1
My feet find their own way, without asking my mind where to go. It's twenty years since I left, and yesterday I heard that he had drowned six years ago. My first thought: it was the death he would have wanted. He loved the outdoors. 2
At the entrance I sit on the rock we often shared, and I hear us, sharing secrets and silences. A familiar damp, leafy smell rises as I venture deeper. In a clearing the grass is no longer flattened by young bodies that lay there dreaming. The tree where we shared our first kiss is taller, and I see remnants of a rope swing on a lower branch. I wander along pathways where thousands of footprints are buried under dead leaves. Did he ever return to this place we called our own? Did he come to remember? To dream? We drifted apart when we left school, and each took a path in life - paths that I know now were never meant to cross. 3
I trip over a hidden stone, and more memories rush back. We called it our post office, where we left notes when we weren't able to meet. I roll it aside, knowing that I will find my answer here. If he had returned, he would have left something that only I would know to find. 4
I open the envelope that is waiting there, and find a silver disc with my name on one side. And I know when I turn it over, I will read another name. HIs. He wore it on a silver chain, always promising that he wouldn't take it off until he knew we'd never meet again. On the back of the envelope, in a handwriting I will always recognize, is the date of the day before he died.5
Author notes
300 Words exactly.
The song "Seasons in the Sun" recently re-recorded by Westlife, kept playing and replaying in my mind while writing this story.
"Goodbye to you, my trusted friend
We've known each other since we were nine or ten
Together we climbed hills and trees
Learned of Love and ABC's
Skinned our hearts and skinned our knees..."
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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I loved this story the first time and I'm glad it won silver.
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It's a very inspiring song, and really did bring a write of heartfelt reminising. Awesome pen Lacy, filled with so much emotion of friendships and life. Congratulations on your winning entry!!
Have a Merry Christmas!
Blessings, Sandi
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A lovely story for this contest. Congratulations on winning silver.
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What a beautifully nostalgic, sentimental story. Fabulously told the description just perfect. Boy am I glad I didn't have to judge this contest! And much congrats on the silver this is really a moving story
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Your word count is right on.
When I read your author comment I thought YES! I grew up with the original of that song and can still sing the entire thing, I did nbot know they had rerecorded it.
I always know when you enter one of my contests that I am in for something a little different, a little unique and again you have not disappointed me one bit.
There are those places and times we would like to go back to aren't there? I will assume, again based on the author ote that this is fiction, but you have done a good job of drawing it as a memory.
Thank you for this wonderful entry and good luck.
susan -
The disc reminds me of one of those best friends matching pendants where it looks like it's been broken down the middle. You write clear pictures and tell the story well. I would like to have known what was in the letter and how he died and I think you have a few more stories lurking in this one. Good luck in the contest.
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It is only 300 words so you can't answer everything but I do wonder what the disc meant. I mean, did he commit suicide or did he have a premonition (or seomething else.) Like I said, I understand the word limitation, and it's often better to leave somethings unanswered considering. Since there is not room for real plot or character development, we rely on issues left unanswered to carry the readers interest. At least that is what I've found to be true. It is less character and more situation generated.
Do you want your readers to look in one of the directions I mentioned? If so, a hint of foreshadowing (and I know how hard it would be under the word limit) would do that.
As usual your style and ability to tell a tale convincingly shine throughout your story. -
wow! this is so good.
and sad.
i think you did a really really great job!
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