Alright, I've been a Christian all of my life. I grew up in a Christian family. My mom's Christian, my dad's Christian, my grandparents were missionaries for 48 years, etc. So basically it was expected that I would be Christian, right? Well, ya, I guess I sort of was. I accepted Christ into my heart when I was young (not sure exactly on my age); however, I didn’t truly accept his love or grace until just a year or two ago.1
My parents got divorced when I was 4 years old. I grew up without a male role model, so my mom was trying to do both roles – mom and dad. She use to go to work for some different businesses, but then she decided to start running a nonprofit and staying at home. She didn’t make much money so we weren’t the richest family, but she provided for my brother and I and gave us a good house to live in.2
Here’s a poem that I described a little bit of the pain of the divorce: allpoetry.com/Poem/15725823
My older brother (who's 22 now), ran away when he was about 13. He kept coming back and kept running away. He went to several different places, foster homes, secure facilities, etc. He kept trying to start his life over and kept messing up. So it was really hard on me with him. Getting up at 2 in the morning to do a 2 hour round trip drive somewhere to pick him up from jail wasn't fun, if you know what I mean. Now, for anyone who’s wondering, my brother is living in Fort Colins, Colorado. He’s started over his life, is living with some great Christian guys, has a job, and everything is going well for him. The reason I mention him in my testimony is because this really impacted me during the years that I was most hurting and most away from God.4
Now, at 4 years old, you don’t know why things happen. People try to tell you that everything isn’t your fault, but the age of reason/logic is between 7-11, so I didn’t know why everything was happening. All I wanted was my daddy back. I needed the attention to be on me, but my brother got it all with his… revolting, I guess you’d call it. I didn’t get the attention I needed as a 4 year old and it really hurt me. My brother had his way of getting out his pain – anger. What was my way? I really don’t think I had a way…. All of my emotions just bundled up inside and stayed there, not being able to escape. 5
Back in 5th grade (near the end), my mom started dating this guy. At first I didn't really like him... just another guy my mom dated. Then I began to get to know him and he was really cool. I have never had a real fatherly figure in my life (which basically every guy needs) so I began to rely on him. I opened up to him and let him in on some secrets. On July 14th, 2000, Ian Graham was killed in a motorcycle accident. He had been riding motorcycles for a long time and was really experienced. So it wasn’t like he was a newbie and was dumb or something.6
Here’s a poem that describes that day: allpoetry.com/Poem/16425927
My aunt use to run a business where she'd go around and sell candy and nuts and stuff to people who worked at other companies. She had a route and such. It was Mountain Man (if you've ever heard of it). I went with her that day. We drove past the site where he was killed, but at the time I didn't know that it was him. I went over to a friend’s house afterwards and when I came home I found out.8
It was pretty hard on me and resulted in me becoming manic depressive, although not to the point where I ever tried to kill myself. The one man who was more of a father to me than my own father was taken out of my life so basically I was ripped in two. The stuff with my brother was still going on plus some other stuff so it just added to the pain. It was also really hard on my mom so she couldn’t be the best mom I needed at the time.9
My mom and I were traveling a lot at the time because she taught all over the world and I went with her, so I dropped out of public school and became homeschooled. So, then I didn't have any friends and I stopped going to church. I slowly turned my back on God and got farther and farther away.10
I went to a couple of councilors, but no one could help, no one could understand. All of my emotions were bundled up inside and I had no way of letting them out. I felt angry at the world, angry at myself, angry at my dad, angry at my mom, angry at everyone. And it hurt me a lot. I was physically, mentally, and spiritually hurt.11
In 9th grade, I went back to public school. I made a couple of friends. One invited me to go to her youth group. Her name was Hannah Blodget. I went with her and I liked the church (Chapel Hills Baptist Church). It had a nice band and the kids there were really friendly. I started going regularly, but then Hannah stopped going because her other church had just started a youth group, but I kept going to Rush Hour (the youth group). Soon I started going to the Sunday morning service and then I even joined the tech team.12
As much as life was good at that time, I was still hurting. I still just wanted to give up. A lot of times I just felt like a flake Christian. One of those who goes to an exciting event, rededicates their life to Christ, and then within a week or two, is bad to their regular schedule and had forgotten all that they had learned and done.13
I went to a thing called Dare2Share ( www.dare2share.org ). It was incredible. It really opened my eyes and showed me the light. They gave us a challenge called the 48 hour challenge. This challenge was for you to witness to one of your friends within 48 hours. I went home and that Monday I went to school and I was on fire for God. It was so incredible of a feeling. That's when I started evangelising and learning how to. I really felt led towards Mormons and talked to a lot of Mormon friends. I read books and everything.14
To skip ahead a little bit, now I'm working with a lady by the name of Christy Harvey who has a ministry towards Mormons and Jehovah Witnesses ( Witnesses for Jesus, Inc.). Sorry if any of you are LDS or JW (if you’re JW, get off the internet!!!)… this is my story. She's mentoring me to work with her. It's really cool and I'm really enjoying it.15
Anyways, in about April of last month, a friend and I started a group called The Movement. It's a Bible study for teens to teach them how to witness to their friends. We've been going for about 11 weeks now. Our numbers change, but it's about an average of 8 a week, depending on if everyone shows up. We've covered tons of topics and everyone seems to like it. We meet on Thursday nights from 6:30-8. If you’re interested in coming, ask me for details!16
In June this summer, a group of 15 of us from our church (13 teens, 2 adults) went down to Juarez, Mexico for a mission trip. It was really sweet. I got to meet a lot of cool people. It was my first mission trip so I really learned from the experience. If you're interested in seeing my journal from that trip, send me a message and I'll send it to you. The main thing that impacted me was the poverty. I know probably a lot of people would say this, but you haven’t seen poor until you see people living in shacks and they are happy.17
In July, my youth group went to a camp called Student Life Camp. Chris Tomlin led the worship and Louie Giglio (not sure how to spell it, sorry). It was really, really an amazing experience and a great bonding time with my friends. In October I went to Utah for a short 2 day mission trip. It was incredible witnessing to Mormons on the street of Utah during their General Conference which ends up having a lot of Mormons there. It was an incredible experience.18
UPDATED SECTION19
I have decided to change this due to that my life has changed. Before I had about 3 paragraphs saying how much my life sucked right now and how I was depressed and such like that. So here I am deciding to change it because life is constantly changing as does my testimony. Right now I am doing good. My life is right on track, although I am having stress with what to do this summer - get a job or go on mission trips and go to summer camps. It's a tough decision, but I'm sure the Lord will help see my through it. 20
I am continually growing in my faith and in my relationship with the Lord, although I do struggle from time to time. I've memorized a lot of verses and I find it easy to memorize new ones so whenever I'm down or sad, I always have a verse come to mind to encourage me and lift me up. If you guys haven't ever thought about memorizing, I definately encourage you to do it.21
All the glory to God forever and ever.22
Author notes
Thanks for reading and ask any questions you want.
Last Updated: March 7, 2006
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Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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Its wonderful to see how far you've come! Last month Chris Tomlin and Louie Giglio (sp?) and Matt Redman were at our church for the Indescribable Tour...what a wonderful worship time we had! Thanks for sharing! God bless you!
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Wow you know some of the things you stated in your testimony I myself have struggled with I love you stil struggle sometimes. But you know god is good and no matter what hes always there and picks me back up as Im sure he will you. Wonderful testimony this touches me.
God BLess
Mary -
AWESOME!
This is very inspiring and I truly enjoyed reading it. WOW! When I found out that u are 16 I couldn't beleive it! U are VERY mature and wise for your age. It is awesome how the Lord works isnt it? Praise God!! This story really encouraged me! I love it!! Keep it up and remember.....NEVER give up!! God is ALWAYS right here with us! Whether we believe it or not!
Thank u for sharing ur story!! really inspired me!
God Bless,
Ashley -
Aw, your story is really inspiring. It gives a lot of hope. Really though, I can't relate to you much at all. Because in my family, my mother doesn't date, I'm the rebellious one, and my brother's something of a bastard. As far as our likenesses go, the only thing we seem to have in common is that our parents are divorced.
Still though, your story offers a lot of hope, and I'm real glad you posted it.
Take care and god bless.
Love always
-moi -
A+
Wow...I can't believe you are just 16 years old. I don't believe I was as articulate and well versed as you when I was 16. I can relate to your divorce experience because my parents split when I was 14; my mom, sister, and I moved from Illinois to Louisiana because that is where my mom's relatives are. My sister and I stayed with my maternal grandma(Grandma Susie) and finished out the school year. Talk about traumatic experience..everyone kept saying I talked funny because I didn't have the "ya'll" southern drawl that they did. Basically my parents split because my dad attempted suicide by drinking clorox; of course it didn't kill him; they pumped his stomach and he wound up in the hospital; eventually in the psych ward. As if that wasn't bad enough, my dad chose to do this stunt in front of me; my mom was sleeping upstairs. My mom was a nurse and she had just got in from the night shift. I've forgiven my dad for the hurt he caused my family but even today ...some 30 some years later I don't feel close to my dad. My sister, on the other hand calls him all the time and has even been up to Illinois to see him. She's three years younger than me, and she wasn't home when the suicide attempt happened. As I recall, she was spending the night with a friend. You have a lot of insight for someone who is just 16. I can vaguely remember my being 16; that was when I began attending a little Baptist church in West Monroe, LA where in the summer of 1970 I made a profession of faith, and later was baptized. Looking back now, I wish I had stayed in church but sad to say..I didn't. By then my parents were in the throes of the divorce and my mom was just trying to take one day at a time, trying to make a decent living for my sister and me. There wasn't much money for extras but we never went hungry. Every now and then my dad would send my sister and me each a check for like $25 or $30...but those checks weren't real regular. I suppose he was struggling to get back on his own feet after his little setback. I've just always wished that I had a normal family, but for some reason God had a reason for placing me in the birth family that He did. Maybe God wanted to teach me something; still trying to figure that one out. How I got from there to where I am now is another long story. Maybe someday I'll sit down and write it all down; maybe in AP...call it the memoirs of Suanne Waso Pritchard...Basically because I also didn't really have a decent father figure through my teen years, I didn't choose my husband well, and after 8 years of marriage we split with one son born to the marriage. Billy was 7 when his dad and I first separated. Billy and I came to Atlanta, LA to live with my mom because it was either that or be homeless is what I felt at the time. Johnnie(my exhusband, Bill's dad) packed up his clothes and tools in our only vehicle and left me with a scared 7 year old boy and the few material possessions we had accumulated during the marriage. Oh yeah..he also left me with a lot of unpaid debt, and very little in the bank to cover that unpaid debt. Then he fled back to Montgomery County, TX where his family is from. Well...here I was with no wheels, no job, a 7 yr old son to support, no husband' hence I went home to Momma. I had to apply for food stamps and afdc because Johnnie chose not to pay child support and the local da's office chose not to prosecute him. That is still a touchy subject with me and my son; deadbeat dads...nonpayment of child support. Looking back now, I think God wanted to teach me to be more compassionate towards those less fortunate than me. God also led me to my current church family, Atlanta Baptist Church where I've been a member since 1989. Billy made a profession of faith and was baptized there. We both consider our church family to be a vital part of our extended family. There are two or three families in my church I am especially close to; the Hoffpauirs for one because they used to be Billy's youth leaders and kind of took Billy under their wing and helped him a lot when he was going through his dad and my divorce. Mr. Mickey coached Billy's LYBA basketball team as well as taught the youth sunday school class with his wife, Jeannie for many years. I feel like God sent them in our lives knowing that we needed some spiritual and emotional support. Back in 1988 my favorite Bible verse was Isaiah 40:31...because reading it over and over just comforted me...I like the idea of soaring on wings like eagles..running and not growing weary.....walking and not being faint...More recently I've found Psalm 37...especially beginning with verse 3 a real comforting promise to me. Ok..this is getting to be a really long comment. I guess your story just opened up the floodgates so to speak for me because I've just basically told my life story here...just wanted to let you know that there is someone out there that can empathize with what you've been through...and I wanted to say to you keep on keeping on...don't give up...Psalm 37...very thought provoking write, my friend
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Inspiring story
This is an amazing story, and how easy it is to forget that we are only pilgrims “wrestling against principalities and spiritual wickedness in high places.” Amazing how God's Grace and your courage shines through. Also, it’s interesting that in the Old Testament books (regarding God's ruling kings), that at the end of each Book, He’d give a report (sort-of a grade) "indicating weather or not they removed the high places."
We tend to forget that we are also in God’s army. Not too long ago I related a similar story to God about my life. And I was surprised that He compared me to a brave shoulder. The apostles "turned the world upside down," Acts 17:6. Paul was accused of troubling the city of Philippi of "advocating customs which were not lawful for Romans to accept or practice," Acts 16:21. The Gospel "casts down everything that exalts itself against the knowledge of God and seeks to bring every thought captive to Christ," II Corinthians 10:5.
You may not see your spiritual muscles; but I’ve travelled the world and can clearly see “such depth of wisdom and maturity in your young life.” Be encouraged, the Hand of the Lord God Almighty is upon you to protect and guide you to His desired heaven. Take care, “my brother.”
~*Milly *~
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hehe i hav found u! (dont ask its elizabeth... from whenu came to france all those yrs ago)
dude i didnt no u was thru so much pain... *yells : y didnt anyone tell me???* heh
so u write too huh? figures... u seemed like that kind of person... ^^
a well just lettin u no im on ap... and that im not the brat i was
*tho u might hav to find that out for urself*
God bless!!
mushy -
Wow Grace.... It really is amazing how much we're similar... Wow... my mom is like 49 this year so our Mom's are like similar in age. And my brother is 22 (I think)... I'm the youngest like out of all my counsins and everything. Kind of sucks being the youngest... ya. And it's okay to ramble... I like it... you can ramble anytime you want. Thanks for reading this.....
--Tim -
Dare2Share OMGOODNESS!!!!!! I went in sixth grade so er um. woah, can you believe that was the same one!!! HAHA!
I went to Baja mexico and woah man, I was the youngest. lol. everyone else was in 8th or higher.. lol. The thing that impacted me the most was this one experiance. We were asking if anyone wanted to accept Christ into their heart and we prayed with them. One man said "Christio en me corazon." That changed me. Amaising.
My uncle lives in Utah... lol.
"every time I get feeling better, my mom seems to drag me back down to the ground." wow. THats how I feel too!!
"midlife crisis." you must be old!
A great ending! I really care about you Tim. Know that. Its amaising how similar our lives are, its almost freaky!
I have to admit that I have never lost a loved one, the clostest thing was my cat Striper (stir I perr)(not stripper...lol). You see, my mom was very sick while I was a child. The cat actually nurchered and cared for me when I was young. Sounds like a fairytale... wow! But because I am so young while the rest of my family is at least 20 or above, heck my mom is 51...or 52. lol. Most of my friends moms are in their early 40's... I know I am going to loose alot of my family soon because they have all reached their prime, well except the younger generations. Thats a fear of mine. Sorry I am rambeling. lol. I just wanted to let you know that I appriciate this because I thought you would never open up, and well God is working in you, because a month ago you wouldnt tell me how much you were hurting. Thats awesome that God did that!!!!!!!
*rocks on*
Grace
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