"Laila. I've been meaning to ask you something."1
It was a week since John and Lizzy had told the lie about Ben. John, Laila, and Lizzy were sitting at lunch with the rest of the crowd. With John's crowd. John was stunned when Ben came all the way over there, chancing getting beaten up, just to talk to the girl who had been avoiding him.2
"What?" Laila turned to face Ben. "Oh. You. What do you want?"3
"Laila, what did I do? Why are you treating me like this? I did nothing to you!" 4
Laila turned away. John glared once again at Ben.5
"Go away. She doesn't want to talk to you."6
The eager look which had been in Ben's eyes when he had first spoken evaporated. John yet again felt guilty.7
"Please, Laila. Just tell me. What did I do? Please."8
Ben's pleading softened Laila's expression. She turned to Ben once more.9
"Fine. Let's talk."10
The two moved slightly away from the group, who by now was attempting to eavesdrop about what Ben of all people could have to talk to a member of the popular crowd about.11
"Laila. I don't know what I..."12
"They told me what you did. God, Harper, you really have no heart, do you? Walking right up to Lizzy and trying to get your claws into me next? Right with her still there?"13
Ben froze. "Harper. So you're destined to be one of them now. I get it. Have a nice year, Laila. Oh, sorry. Marques. I won't bother you again."14
And Ben was gone. Laila's eyes trailed him, clearly feeling awful. She returned to her seat between John and Lizzy. She turned back to see where Ben had gone. John's eyes followed her gaze. Ben was sitting on the ground with his back to the wall. Christian was talking to him, but it was evident that Ben was in tears. The two got up and left.15
The guilt which had escaped John returned at this sight. He turned back to Laila.16
"Hey, I've been meaning to ask you something."17
She kept staring at the door through which Ben and Christian had just disappeared.18
"Laila. Forget him. He's a jerk."19
"I know. It just seems... So wrong."20
"Umm... I know this is probably the worst time to ask you this. But I've been wanting to ask you for a while now, and... Will you go out with me?"21
"Oh, come on. I barely know you, John!"22
"We could change that! We hang out all the time, so we might as well..."23
"You're right. I'm being stupid. Yeah, sure." Her eyes were still uncertain. But it was official. Laila and John were dating.24
Author notes
I will add chapter four as soon as I get it written. Right now, all that's there is a paragraph, so I'm not uploading it. No point. I'll add more to it soon enough, I promise 
In a list
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
-
I wished this chapter was a bit longer.
Till now the story has a good flow, it's easy and a pleasure to read.
I'm waiting for the next chapter. Keep writing.
beginning: 4, language: 4, plot: 4, ending: 4, dialog: 5, characters: 4.
-
-
Yeah, I was thinking of extending this chapter. It ends rather abruptly. I'll let you know when I add either the next chapter or adding on to this one.
-
-
Still a bit fast
para 15> "Ben was in tears" don't know many guys who would be this destroyed at this point, but I'm a dinosaur. Pretty good dialogue, flows pretty naturally.
-
-
Again, I suck at showing the passing of time. It had been a month or so, but I didn't show that amount of time very well.
Thanks!!
-
-
Hmmm ... that last line where she says yes, seems a bit off. Change the wording or include more talking, maybe? That´s just my opinion of course
*wants to know what people look like*
maybe I should wait with reading these until detail has been added ...
But I am liking the story.
-
-
I'll be adding detail after I get past the writing of chapter four. Because I'm a little stuck as of now. Literally I've been in class and something pops into my head and I write it, but it's hard to fit into the scheme of where this is taking me.
*rereads that section*
Yeah that's a little awkward. I'll reword that. Thanks for pointing that out.
-
-
No problem. Happy to help
-
-
-
-
Adding your comment:
1 - 8 of 8
