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I stand here alone in the dark, with heavy fog moving all around.2
Death steps up, his black cloak and sickle touching the ground.3
He walks around me a few times, pulls the hood from his head.4
And said "I'm here, I'm the keeper, how would you like to be dead"5
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"I have been watching you for quite awhile" As he raises his head up,7
you could see his skeletal smile. I said "WHY WOULD YOU WANT ME? 8
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I'M NOTHING TO YOU" He said "OH YES DEAR BOY" your one of the few.10
I just took one from that house as you are aware, I do this all the time11
without feeling or care. I said go to hell, I don't play your game.12
He said "drop to your knees boy, you will now begin to praise my name"13
He raised his sickle and commented "That's just fine" as I shouted out14
to him, your god is not mine. I pray to a higher lord from up above,15
you can take my life but never take my love. He paused for a moment16
saying; "why should I spare you" fore this is something that is long17
overdue. Just then he begain to grin with a harsh laugh in his voice,18
"Now I must take you, I just have no choice" His eyes begin to glow19
a fiery red & yells; " SIT STILL BOY, WHILE I TAKE OFF YOUR HEAD"20
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I jumped to my feet and ran as fast as I could. I just kept on running,22
he knew that I would. As lightning was striking, and hail begin to pour23
I had reached my house and went through the open front door. I stood 24
there in silence, and the air felt so dead. As I turned around I heard,25
OFF WITH YOUR HEAD! Just then I woke up, & the sweat rolled down 26
my face. I prayed to the lord to hold me, in his loving grace. As I sat 27
up and looked over at the door, that's when I saw the mud on the floor.28
I looked toward the corner and noticed something with a skeletal grin,29
. 30
And he said "don't worry boy, I'll be back someday to see you again"31
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Author notes
This was a dream I had, I woke up in my dream thinking I was really waking up, Kinda threw me over the edge.
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
1 - 24 of 24
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Scary Dream.
interesting approach. The story of the poem was good, yet the flow when it was there it was kinda weak. totally enjoyed it. I'ven never heard of the grim reaper speaking with the object of his desire, this made it interesting.beginning: 1, language: 5, plot: 3, ending: 4, dialog: 2, characters: 4.
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ok
This was really well done and written but poems was not what i was looking for. -
I am used to rhymes being at the end of each line when people decide to do so, so to find them occluded and all over the place threw me for a couple of loops. This piece reminds me of a dream I had once about death, as well, as I remember standing on a cliff, hearing a gruff voice call to me from below, and slipping. Fortunately, an angel caught me on the way down and lifted me back toward heaven. Unfortunately, when I woke up I found myself laying on the floor instead of in my bed (which kinda hurt)
This piece is so eerie, I'd think I'd be (literally) scared to death if I had to face the Grim Reaper. One thing I must praise you for, you make known the importance of relying on God when such terrifying times come. Thank you for this entry, and I wish you the best of luck in the contest.
Many blessings,
Raven Aurora
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creepy, mysterious, dark! wow...really good! love the picture...very well written i think the way it is written is great! thanx for entering good luck!
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creepy.... :( i would be scared!
CREEPY!!! That would scare the crap out of me!!! Very nice imagery! although it's not really a poem... more of a story but it's still very well written! thank you so much for entering my contest! I really appreciate it! I enjoyed reading your writing! I would be very scared if i had a dream like this... I hope you have better dreams! thank you again! and take care! <3 <3-Erin -
The Imagery In this write was AMAZINGLY awesome This one was the IMAGERY piece I needed..... Good Job Pop
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spine tingling
Ehhaya... Turns around to make sure nothing is behind her. Creepy. I love it. made me paranoid. It's great. Unique style, i've never seen anything like it. :applause: -
ooh what a bad dream that was, you did so well at writting this it felt like the beginning of a horror movie... great write scary dream...
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OW! This really was dark! I love the ending! Great Write!
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I've read this one quite a few times, but I don't remember if I
commented on it before. So here goes...to me this is a totally awesome write. There's so many different thoughts and emotions that enter my head every time I read this. Different every time.
The first time when I read this, I wasn't sure what way to take it til near the end. Then I just thought it was really beautiful coz your love, belief and trust of God comes thru...tho I'm not a believer myself, I respect, admire and envy people who have that belief in them. Today, that's not what I see, feel or read but that doesn't matter...it's still an awesome write. Well done!
Peace & love to ya,
Roz.
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Oh, how interesting! Poems inspired by dreams are almost always amazing. This is a very cool piece. It has a nice flow, and the way you presented it was pretty cool too. Good job!
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Wow. in my opinion prettie cool dream. scary, but cool. Anyways you wrote it very well. I loved it. You're an awesome writer. You can come by my site anytime you please. Just keep up the great work. Also Best wishes with you new years.
xXFallenXx -
this is great, GB, i love it. it's sorta scary tho i loved how you made it rhyme. I flows nicely, but you coulda worded it a little better. An overall good piece, that yo ushould be proud of. and I LOVE the picture its like awesome. Well, you get muh point. great job, GBGreat work man
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damn... i was thinking i'd be cheesy when i saw the picture. but hellsa yeah i loved it Hope he dosen't getcha
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Thank you bloodyrazor. You think this is wild. This was a dream I had, and I woke up in my dream and thought I really woke up and seen mud on the floor and red eyes in the corner, then I really woke up and realized I was dreaming and I tripped. Hope you enjoyed, Getsbetter
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this is awsome, its not only a poem, but a great story that all fits together, i love how you wrote this! this one is really sticking in my head, im almost done judging the contest, and this poem makes it much mare harder to figure out who to give the points to. crazy! anyway great job! i look forward to seeing moreof your writting! Jen (judge)
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Thanks dark soul for your great response. MAY THE BOOGIE MAN NOT CRAWL IN YOUR BED TONIGHT!. Just kiddin!!!!, Thanx again!,G.
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HOLY CRAP!!! this poem rocked!! i loved the way you described death and the conversation between you & him fit very well into the poem!! omg wow i really enjoyed it!! keep up the awesome writing!!!!
~Darksoul216** -
actually this was a dream that I had. in my dream this happened and I woke up in my dream (but still asleep) and seen mud on the floor from being outside and running across the yard and into the house. Then I really woke up from the dream. yes it was wild, and you are absolutely right,he will come some day, but not to fear,,,the lords with me.God bless,G.
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This is dark and eerie. We all anticipate death (especially when we get older) but I have yet to invision it as vividly as you have here. The reality is; no matter how we run, that old hooded spirit will get to us all someday. The beauty in dying is the life after, for those who believe. Although this writ is dark, it has light of the Lord. Very nicely penned.
Renee
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An excellent poem.Very Dark.He will never come to get you whilst you have the light of love in your heart.It is joined by another light from a higher plane, God bless, Ros
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Thank you broken, yes a have a few sentances I need to adjust. I've caught them already, thank ya darlin. and thats the way I wanted it scary,G.
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this is great, GB, i love it.
it's sorta scary tho i loved how you made it rhyme. I flows nicely, but you coulda worded it a little better. An overall good piece, that yo ushould be proud of. and I LOVE the picture its like awesome. Well, you get muh point. great job, GB
-sethigirl (a random poet)
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AWESOME man this is great good job i like it-william
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