Chapter 1 1
I wept at my father’s feet, begging the captors to let me stay. They cruelly shook their head and carried me off. I screamed and cried as they carted me off. I looked at my father, his head held high as he looked at me coldly. All of his people were watching, so I understood why he was acting like that. It didn’t make it hurt any less. 2
I was tempted to cry out as the drug my bare knees across the raw tile on the ground. I watched as my father faded from view, a single tear streaking down his face. Suddenly, I felt like the rightful princess I was. I shoved a guard off me and stood up, picking up all the dignity I had left. The guard bared his teeth at me as I stood up straight, dusting off my ripped dress. He took a tighter hold on my arm as he led me out of the palace, my palace. 3
As they loaded me up in the cart, I thought how lucky I really was. Compared to all the people they captured, I was one of the few that would make the ride to Egypt alive. Either they would torture some slowly, or they would die from sickness, starvation, etc. I heard the moans from the back of the cart. I bet they wish they hadn’t been scheming, I though bitterly. 4
So, why were we in this situation? The people of Algeria wanted to attack Egypt. The people were jealous because of Egypt’s wealth due to their rich farmlands. Everyone in Algeria agreed whole-heartedly, excluding my family. They were the King and Queen of Algeria, so they were left alone, of course. Although my parents were against it, they did not stop the people, fearing that they would over-power my father if they all were against him. If we had any inkling of an idea that we had a snitch in our mist, we would have immediately put stop to the invasion.5
Once Egypt had heard wind of our plan, they invaded us. They had slowly killed off the families involved. We had hidden for about two weeks before the Egyptians figured out where we were hiding. My family was spared though, people vouched that we had nothing to do with the invasion. (syn.) To show our people what the Egyptians were capable of, they took me as a prisoner. My mother and father had taken it very well that their only daughter was being shipped of to some far away city in Egypt. My father had always been a proud person though, and my mother stood with him no matter what. I didn’t blame them.6
A scream of pain brought me back to the harsh reality. I put my hands over my ears in an attempt to block out the horrible noise. When I removed my trembling hands, I heard cruel laugher from the guards. I glared at them with malice in my eyes. The people being murdered were my friends, people I helped on occasion, people I had played with when I was young. Tears filled my sea green eyes, but I hurriedly wiped them away, hoping the guards had not seen me. 7
I managed to wait out the rest of the horrible ride that day in silence, refusing to talk to the evil guards. They taunted me, toyed with me, and even sickly complimented me. I closed my ears to them though, and sat the rest of the ride out with my hands folded up in my lap. 8
When the sun started sinking in the sky, they Egyptian guards stopped to make camp. I was shoved out of my seat and put to work building a fire, something I had never done before. I struggled to make a spark in vain. I screamed in frustration and threw the rocks on the ground. I began to weep from frustration, exhaustion, and sadness. I missed my home, my family, and all my friends. I felt a hand on my shoulder and I turned around to see an elder from my home. 9
“Eli!” I called out, wrapping my arms around the old man.10
“Princess,” Eli said, bowing deeply.11
I flushed a deep red and pulled him up by the arm. “Not here,” I whispered.12
He nodded and smiled toothlessly at me. “Do you need help?” he asked, gesturing to the rocks. I nodded and he stooped over, patiently rubbing the two rocks together until sparks flickered like wildfire off them. I bent down with the old man and began adding kindle, dried up leaves, and small twigs. Eventually, we had a fire big enough to cook something on. 13
The guards cooked up a strange looking meat and set it on clay plates that were passed to each of us. Everyone before me took a small piece and set it in their lap or on the rock they were sitting on. I took a small chunk of the odd meat and set it on the rock next to me. Next, they passed around a large pita from which everyone took a larger chunk. I too took a large chunk and set it next to my meat. I saw them pull another plate off, this one piled with stalks of green vegetables. I heard the guards calling it celery, a word I had not heard before. I hesitantly took a stalk of this ‘celery’ and set it away from the rest of my meal. Last, they passed around a clay mug filled with the popular Egyptian drink, beer. I drunk heavily and passed it on to the next person, wiping my mouth quickly.14
No more plates came out, and I noticed that they hadn’t fed all the people captured. I looked over at the hungry eyes of many men, women, and children, my people. I was tempted to eat all the food by myself, but I couldn’t deny my people of their right to eat. I beckoned Eli over and gave him half of the meat, and all of the bread and ‘celery’. He gave me a big grin and rushed over to the rest, attempting to pass out food in an orderly fashion. 15
I nibbled on the spicy meat, and almost consumed it in one bite. It was wonderful. Spices and juices all packed up in one piece. We didn’t have food like that where I came from. I didn’t know if it was utter exhaustion or hunger that made the food taste so good, but it did. When I started to wonder if I could have more, the plate filled with meat was passed around again. The guard to the left of me pulled of a big chunk and passed it to me. I stared at the meat and then pulled a bigger chunk off, leaving little for the other guards.16
I heard hearty chuckles behind me as one of the guards called for more eagle meat. I gagged loudly along with the rest of my people. We were forbidden to eat any bird that scavenges, which is exactly what an eagle did. In my Jewish religion, we were forbidden to eat many things. I threw the meat on the ground and stepped out in it, dust completely overtaking it. I heard yells of anger and yelps of surprise from behind me, but I didn’t care. I was completely disgusted by what these… heathens would eat. 17
Someone behind me pulled me by the arms, jerking me away from the warm fire. I fell backwards on the rough ground as he dragged me back to the cart. “Maybe this will help you learn a lesson about wasting food,” he hissed, as he shoved me in the dark cart. 18
I sat curled in a ball in the corner of cart as I heard my people moaning outside. I shivered violently as I thought of the warm fire outside. I could imagine the shame they must feel because they disrespected Yahweh, the shame that I now felt. I put my hands up to my head to cover my face as I prayed repentance. 19
I was interrupted by a guard coming in to the cart. A soft light poured in as he climbed into the cart. He was carrying a flickering torch to illuminate the pitch-black cart. “Don’t you know you aren’t supposed to interrupt a woman when she is praying?” I shouted at the man.20
He nodded impatiently and crouched down next to me. I studied him for a moment as he sat there silently. He was in his late thirties and it looked like he really didn’t want to be here. “I’m Tau,” he announced after a minute.21
“Nanu,” I said crisply, refusing to be kind to this man.22
He nodded. “I was sent in here to tell you what’s going to happen to you if you don’t stop giving us trouble,” he warned. I opened my mouth to give him a piece of my mind, but he stopped me wearily. “Listen, you’re lucky you are alive. All of your ‘people’ out there, they’re either going to die or are going to be slaves for the rest of their lives. You’re lucky. You’re going to go to our palace in Egypt and spend the rest of your days as someone’s lady-in-waiting. Then, when you get older you will probably be married off to a clergy’s youngest son. You’ll have it pretty good, and you’re very lucky,” he finished.23
I knew he was right, that I really was very lucky. I sat there, with tears in my eyes as he stood back up and got ready to leave. “Maybe even Cleopatra’s lady-in-waiting,” he called over his shoulder, chuckling (syn.) to himself. 24
I was confused, but I didn’t let it show. I had heard stories about Cleopatra before. How she was the first woman to rule all of Egypt. I had heard stories about how beautiful and seductive she was. And others about how cunning and brilliant she was. I watched as the man exit the cart, leaving me with no light. I curled up back in my ball, and slipped into an uneasy sleep.25
Chapter 2 26
The rest of the trip mainly consisted of sleeping and talking occasionally to the guards that gave me my food. I didn’t eat much of the food they gave me, I refused to. They kept on feeding me the eagle meat, and each time I refused with more venom. I threw it in their face or pitched it out of the cart. Each time, they patiently picked it back up and ate it themselves. The moans of my people never stopped, but slowly, the loudness decreased, there were enough of them left to make it as loud as it once was. (re-phrase)27
Eventually, I heard shouts and cries of “We’re there!” I bolted up and peered out of the cart. A guard ushered me out and let me take a minute to take in my new surroundings. A huge palace lay in front of me. I almost passed out, I was so overwhelmed. I thought my palace back home was big, I was wrong.28
The beautiful palace that lay in front of me was built completely of a pale marble. It was bigger than anything I could ever imagine. There were slits for windows, so dust and heat would not come in the palace, but were covered by colorful cloth; reds, blues, purples, yellows, any color you could imagine. Faces poked out of the windows occasionally, watching the approaching cart. Strong, sturdy looking walls enclosed the palace. Swirls of colors decorated the clay wall beautifully. I was in awe. The walls were guarded by four men clutching spears to their chests.29
The grounds surrounding the palace were almost more beautiful than the palace itself. A huge pond with brightly colored fish was to my left, a grove of grape vines to my left. Sunlight streamed down on the pond, making it sparkle beautifully. Rows and rows of delicious grape vines stood temptingly, children picking the small fruit off and cramming them into their little mouths. A path of golden bricks snaked its way through gardens of freshly grown vegetables and trees of ripe fruit. Beautiful men and women strolled across the garden grounds carelessly, not even glancing up to see the battered cart approaching. 30
Men playing drums loudly attracted the attention of most of the people. People surrounded the man throwing, coins at him and dancing with the music. The dancing men were dressed in loincloths that hung just above their knees with coats made out of animal skin wrapped around their muscled bodies. The swaying women wore tight, straight dresses with shoulder straps that reached from above their chest down to their knees or ankles. Rainbow colored cloaks laid on their shoulder as they danced, the cloaks swaying (syn.) in the slight breeze. The richer women wore collars of jewels, the less rich ones wearing collars of beads. None of them were poor, not at all. Some of them were just richer than others. 31
Older children were playing in a stable filled with camels and horses. They were feeding vegetables to the horses and sitting on the camel’s humps, giggling as the camel struggled to flick them off. The horses were mellow and relaxed as the children climbed on them. A few bold and risky children played in the chariots lined neatly against wall. I turned away as one of the children shrieked as a wheel broke off, a small smile playing at my lips.32
Rows and rows of wheat, corn, barley, and cotton surrounded the palace. I knew Egypt had very fertile land compared to the rest of Africa, but this was unbelievable. The Nile River rushed past steadily, the source of all this beautiful land. Small fishes swimming in it and little children attempting to catch them. I thought of my place back home. The starvation, the thirst, the- I shook the thoughts out of my head and studied my new home a little bit more. 33
A boy, probably about the age of sixteen or seventeen, was the only one to notice the cart. All he wore was a too small loincloth that was a couple inches above his knees. He reached up to wipe the sweat of his brow as he picked up the heavy bags he had been carrying. Cart forgotten, he turned back around and up to the palace.34
I was jerked back into actuality as a guard pulled hard on my arm. I yelped out in surprise as he dragged me through the gate, nodding twice at the other protectors. He banged hard on the door leading into the castle. My mouth fell open when the door swung open to reveal the inside of the magnificent palace. 35
The door revealed a luxurious entrance hall. Splendid ebony tables were pressed against the walls, papers littered the top and red or yellow candles burned brightly, leading the way through the glorious home. Beautiful pictures of grand men and women dressed in fancy clothes hung on the walls to be seen by all. The Grande Staircase led up to many different divisions of the palace. I longed to travel up the staircase, but instead the guard heaved me to a side door.36
As we made our way along the dark corridor, I struggled to make out faint outlines of shapes in the dark hall. I managed to make out the faint shape of a broad statue just before he pushed me into another side door.37
That was the first time I saw her. She was sitting in a royal chair, not a throne, but definitely a royal chair. Despite all the tales I had heard of her being so beautiful, she really wasn’t. She had a long hooked nose and very masculine features, broad shoulders and a squared jaw. Her slender lips were a deep red color and she was wearing kohl. She wore a band around her neck covered with diamonds, gold, and shiny gypsum. She wore diadem around her head, a sign of royal power. She glared down at me with dark gray eyes, I was almost afraid just to be in her presence.38
The guard must have felt it too, for his grip on my arm tightened ten fold. I fell to the ground, knowing not what else to do. 39
“My Queen,” said the guard, uncertainly falling on the ground along with me. I glanced over at him and saw the fear in his pale blue eyes. For an instant, I felt pity for this man. It was immediately replaced by fear as Cleopatra spoke for the first time. 40
“Who is this?” she asked in a voice that made my blood run cold. Sure, it was a beautifully musical voice, but there was an unexplainable edge to it that made me fear her. 41
“A girl we captured,” the guard said in a trembling voice.42
“Then why do you bring her to me?” asked Cleopatra, malice laced in her voice. 43
“Her parents were not going to attack us, they disagreed,” the once mighty protector said in a weak voice. “I didn’t know if you wanted to spare her life or not.”44
Cleopatra stared down at the quivering man. Her gray eyes narrowed at me and frightened me more than I could ever tell. She waved her delicate hand at the guard. “To the dungeon with her while I figure out what to do,” she said in a mighty voice. She turned back around to do whatever she had been doing before we entered her room. 45
The man stood back up and looked at me, compassion in his blue eyes. I didn’t know anything about the dungeon, but the way the guard looked at me, I didn’t have a good feeling about it.46
Chapter 3 47
Cleopatra had been staring out her slit of a window when the guard and young lady had entered. She could feel fear radiate off of the two of them like a hearth radiating heat. Cleopatra had stifled a laugh when the girl and guard both had fallen weakly to their knees. She loved it when people were scared of her, and it was extremely obvious that they were.48
She took in the appearance of the trembling girl. She had long black that fell above her hips and green eyes that were filled with fear. Cleopatra could tell that the girl’s eyes usually weren’t fear-filled. She looked like a strong girl that would speak her mind if she had to. Cleopatra decided she liked the girl. She would keep her as a… lady-in-waiting. Cleopatra was surprised at her own thoughts, but she would keep the girl.49
She would force the girl to spend sometime in the dungeon though, to show her what Cleopatra was capable of.50
Chapter 4 51
I was trembling in the dungeon when the door opened and a soft light poured (syn.) in. “Oh, thank you,” I said quietly to a man that picked me up and steadied me.52
I clutched the unfamiliar man as I willed my head to stop spinning. I felt something warm in my hand and I looked down. A large pita (syn.) was in my trembling hand. I stuffed it into my mouth. After two days of no food or water, I was famished.53
I looked up into the eyes of my savior and saw the same boy I had seen when I we had first came here. “Th-thank you,” I said quietly. 54
He nodded and handed me a cup filled with a spicy beer. I coughed loudly and spat it out, disliking the taste. “Water?” I begged. He shook his head and bit his lip.55
He took the cup from my hand and dashed off, speeding away. Tears filled my eyes and I sunk to the ground, knowing I was going to die in this horrible place. I put my face in my hands and cried. I felt a cool hand on my back and I bolted up. I saw the kind brown eyes of the young boy and another cup in his hand. He handed it to me.56
I took a hesitant sip, not able to see the drink in this light, despite the light that illuminated the horribly dirty dungeon. I tasted the cool liquid of water on my tongue and sighed happily. I drunk graciously from the cup, only pausing to catch my breath.57
After every last drop was gone, I was content to let this mysterious boy lead me to my fate. “Are you ready?” he asked. I nodded silently. He started walking quickly ahead of me, and eventually I was running to keep up.58
“Can you slow down?” I huffed. Leaning on the stone wall. “Where are we going?” I asked him when he came over to me. 59
“Cleopatra has decided to keep you,” he told me simply, shrugging.60
My mouth fell open. I wasn’t sure if it was a good thing or not, but I figured it must be better than living in that dungeon. As he leaded me down the winding passages, I became more nervous to see Egypt’s Queen.
Author notes
I've published part 1, but I decided to do all of it here. Enjoy.
A contest entry
- ~~ Go For Gold ~~ by IceCrystal7.
1100 points, ends November 28, 16 entries
• next story in this contest, • Add to finalists list, or remove from contest - Story Contest #7 (Be creative. Sway me. Get lucky.) by VelvetWings.
350 points, ended November 18, 13 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - --->Originality and Creativity by Stars-are-Blind93.
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What did you think?
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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this was good
were the historical facts real? or did you invent them?
you should continue this, and add some interesting twist to it
good luck! -
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All of the facts are one hundred percent true and up to date. Thanks for the comment.
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Very good. I read the vast majority of it, as the page began to grow a little fuzzy. Maybe I'm just tired.

Anywho, great story idea. I like the idea of it, so good job. I wouldn't even be brave enough to attempt something like this. Too much research makes my brain go *pop*!! Lol.
That's why I gotta make stuff up as I go along. You know, improvising and whatnot?

love
and most importantly
Ink ~ -
Hello and thank you for the contest entry.
I love stories about Egypt and Cleopatra, although I felt this was a bit dry and drawn out in places. I noticed a good few grammar errors here and there that also detracted from the reading of the story.
But aside from those things, I really like it. There's a lot of conflict, and Nanu is a very believable character. Unfortunately with the chapters, it's not a complete story on its own and I find that difficult to judge for my contest. I'll definitely keep this in mind though.
Partially swayed.
~Sparrow -
The story seems to be pretty good. I think your pacing might be a touch slow. It seems you are dragging somethings out. The prose and writing is has been done very well though. I look forward to seeing more.


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I have to say I really really enjoyed this! I havn't read a good historical fiction in ages, and this is one I would love to read more of!!


1 - 6 of 6








