ScientLULZogy

I think that the Scientoligists should count their losses, and stop now...1

They have already taken Tom Cruise, and turned him into a batshit pig-fucker. It's not as if their cult-- sorry, 'religion' makes much sense anyway, here's what they belive (I think): An alien came down from... I dunno... let's call it Pervertland (You'll see why in a second), now aliens from Pervertland get really horny, so this alien crashes on Earth... now, because he's from Pervertland, he's really turned on, and needs to fuck something... desperately... so he see's an ape-woman, and raped her... (I could be wrong about this)2

This is perhaps the most second most bullshit religion on the planet, right next to Mormonism, which just adds a layer onto the humiliation of man.3

The religion, is mainly for celebrities who aren't getting enough publicity... both of them...4

This rant was originally going to be about Scientology, but just after writing the above paragraph, I thought, we need to rant about the Mormon's too5

Never leave their cultish bullshit out...6

There's honestly not much to say about Mormonism, they just believe in some modern prophet... well 19th Century prophet7

They've also completely trashed the few 'believeable' bits of the Bible, and added there own rubbish in for good measure8

So, you'd say:9

"But hold on, Ranter, wouldn't that make it a denomination of Christianity, rather than it's own seperate religion?!"10

Well, I suppose you're right...11

...12

Seriously, that's all I have to say for that. Everyone calls it it's own religion apart from Wikipedia... but, although reliable, this particular point has no source pointed to it.13

And it doesn't say "Mormonism is a denomination of Christianity, rather than a religion, it justs lists it as a denomination, so I think it was just some pillock, who thought he was better than everyone...14

...15

...What?16

Christians have wide and varied beliefs, and each denomination say's you 'can' believe this. Mormoinsm based the full religion on being racist, homophobic, but for some reason, they think that Jesus went to America, and talked to the Indians...17

Yeaaahh...18

So the whole reason the Indians didn't listen to the teachings that claimed the divinity of Christianity/Judaism, and instead followed their own faith was just because they thought that, that God couldn't exist, despite the fact that they saw someone swoop down, and claim his existence?19

Yeaaahh....20

The most Mormonism and Scientoligy have done, was send death threats to people who abandoned the religion.21

But, we live in fear for the day when both religions combine...22

Fuck...