Leaves rustled as a cool breeze floated through the trees. The snapping and crunching of leaves and twigs could be heard as something forced its way through the brush. It passed between the tress into a small gap, an empty space through which the night sky could be glimpsed. There, in the stream of silver light stood a man.1
As if asleep the man's gaze slowly shifted towards the source of light. His head throbbed steadily as he stared up into the cold night. His vision was blurred from exhaustion. His mind was fogged and muddled. His thoughts slowly tried to form themselves. His breath was ragged as he breathed the chilly night air, clinging to consciousness before collapsing on the ground.
Author notes
This is kind of a new story. The prologue is kind of a third person thing, but the story I think I'm going to do in first person.
In a list
Comments
-
Fab!
This is very good but there shouldn't be such a big gap between the second sentence. Also the his in paragraph 2 sentence 4 should be capitalized. But other than that its perfect. -
-
Gap
What do you mean by gap between the second sentence? Do you mean paragraph?
-
Adding your comment:
