I have no right to be alive. I have no right to tell you how I feel. I have no right to speak. I say this, because it is true, not because I want you to pity me or anything like that. I say this, because I am me, and if you know me at all, this should make a whole lot of sense. 1
Nobody 'round here believes in me. Nobody 'round here gives a shit if I live or die. She doesn't love me like I want her to. They don't trust me like I need them to. I don't like me like I wish I did. This is just the way it is, whether I like it or not. I live in a city of beautiful people, but I am just an ugly excuse for a human. All of the people in this city have morals, and I am just an eternally damned monster. I fuck everything up. I ruin the relationships that I want to last. I give myself a bad reputation in front of the people I wish respected me. 2
Maybe the fact that I am haunted with headaches and addictions has put me in this state of subconscious hatred for everything. Maybe it is my personal issues that give meaning to my constant verbal self destruction. 3
What if people really do care about me? What if it's my mindset that is placing me under a veil of self-pity that is incoherent with other peoples opinions. Yeah fucking right, who am I kidding, everyone hates me.
A contest entry
- Dark Stories by Dead Beauty.
380 points, ended November 20, 24 entries
• next story in this contest, • Add to finalists list, or remove from contest - Give me emotion! 1st emotion contest of many, hopefully by ajs back.
100 points, ended November 19, 28 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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This is good...
I can definately see the emotion in this. It is very well done! Not only is it emotional, but it is also very realistic, which makes it even better. Good luck in my contest! -
I don't hate u Tero man! =]
I never felt like this, but i know HEAPS that proabably could relate. Hope ur not one of them, u rock man! Peace -
Dark Stories
That was... painful. Emotional. This is probably one of the best examples of what I am looking for in this contest, and this? well, this story was deep. Thanks for entering (:
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i went to write a comment yesterday and i accidently deleted it.. but what i was gonna say, is i know how you feel in terms of the self-loathing, hate, unrequited love as such, but don't give up..
its hard not to give in to the addiction, what ever it may be. what would you do? turn to your friends who you know would bitch and complain and judge you, or the addiction, the one thing that is accepting towards you, and as you take it in your hands, you begin to see it smile that ever so welcoming, shiny, silver smile that always pulls you into that familiar world of pain... you can obviously tell what my addiction is...
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