Parallel

Isn't it funny how life sometimes feels like a dream, with everything going around you, but not actually real? Like its all some elusive drug induced cocktail of a ride, with slow-mo graphics, and distored images of those you hate. Like somewhere someone's watching this as a film, watching all the little things happening to you and laughing and crying when you are. Like someone out there is watching, constantly watching, and your life is nothing more then a show where you cannot control what happens, purely for someone's entertainment in another galaxy.1

Ever felt that when you're watching a film, that you're actuallly just watching someone else's life somewhere in a parrell universe where everything and anything can happen? You can relate so strongly to the character, that you're sure they exisit somewhere and their lives are mirroring to yours, that you watch their lives in a film, and in return, they watch yours? 2

Like these films are unfolding all across the world, every individual 6 billion of them, with different things, similar situations shared, but different responses, different characters, and different lives, unique lives. And most the time the film that is your life isn't even being watched by someone, you think it is, but its like a TV left on for a period of time, and every now and then someone glances at it while doing a crossword or something. But addictive, so addictive.3

When sometimes a musical high can give you such a buzz, that it doesn't compare to anything else in the world. And you're not sure if you're actually listening to the music physically, or whether its in your head, but you just turn the radio off in your mind when you don't want to hear it anymore. Like that little voice that says everything, but when you're into something else you don't even hear him, you switch him off to enjoy the moment. 4

Knowing you feel something as strong as love, but not a single person you can attach it to. Ready to accept a relationship, but not ready to make the jump. Well maybe you're not ready then. You can waffle all you like about the movies but you know that in films people aren't too shy to ask someone out, that they get on with their lives, and face the rejection head on. They are couragous; Can't relate to that one though.5

Not quite able to explain the passion that fills you, the need, the hunger, the want to explain yourself, to justify yourself, to EXPRESS yourself in all ways shapes and forms avaible. Just to reach out, and grab that star and paint with it, until the edges are broken, until the points are dull and its glow has left. Its just fear that fills you, from the second you wake up, to the second you sleep. And where did it come from? Why do you feel it? Though you hate it, you can't really change it, because you're too scared..6

So deal with it. Be a mouse.7

You fucking twat.8