Tough Cops

Joe was a TOUGH COP.1

Bob was a TOUGH COP.2

Vince was a TOUGH COP.3

Tom was a TOUGH COP.4

Chris was a TOUGH COP.5

Jim was a TOUGH COP.6

Six TOUGH COPS.7

All in one unit.8

Welcome to the land of...9

TOUGH COPS.10

Tough Cops - Day One:11

Some suicidal guy on the streets of Burma, which the TOUGH COPS were invading at the time, mouthed off to Vince. Vince beat the crap out of him and threw him in the door of a Chinese restaurant.12

Meanwhile, Jim, Chris and Joe were investigating a murder. 'Are you guilty?' Chris asked someone who came up to him. The person did not respond. Chris beat the crap out of him. 'I ask again. Are you guilty?' No response. Chris pushed the guy in the direction of Joe. 'Take 'im to the HQ. I think he's guilty.13

The other two TOUGH COPS, Bob and Tom, were back at the HQ, drinking beer and smoking weed. They were very unlawful TOUGH COPS. But they were damn TOUGH. And that's what counts.14

Tough Cops - Day Two:15

All six of the TOUGH COPS got together. They'd be taking a jet to Kuwait, where they would 'investigate' a crime. A threat made by terrorists, to be exact. They arrived at the scene at seven AM. Jim and Bob got in a fistfight over who got to beat the crap out of a witness to see if they were guilty. Eventually, Vince just took over. He beat the crap out of Jim and Bob, then out of the witness, who they eventually sent back to the HQ. Then, Vince fell through a hidden trapdoor and into the terrorists' lair. What do you know, they weren't from the Middle East. They were from Iowa. Yup. Iowa. Vince, being a TOUGH COP, beat the shit out of all twenty-seven of the terrorists. Who were, may I reiterate, from IOWA.16

So these terrorists, from Iowa, were all dead now, because Vince, who was a TOUGH COP, had killed them all to keep his reputation.17