Runaway

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“I hate you!” she screamed as she smashed the door and ran to the park. Tears ran across her face while she was still sprinting. Her mind was empty but her legs knew the way.
After a while she became slower as she reached the place; a footbridge. It was her little secret, here no one could find her and she was alone. No bitchy snob mother who reminds you everyday how worthless you are and that you shouldn’t be alive. No brother who teases you because you wear black jeans and shirts and because you’re a little bit chubby. No dad who yells at you because his wife is screaming. It’s just a little footbridge surrounded by plants and water.
Sitting down in the middle she burst into tears. She was praying to God to bring her the only person she loves. She just wants to be holed by him, to smell his odor, to feel his breath, to hear his voice. But this seems so unreal. Like this would never happen. Like a dream where you know that it will end up in a nightmare at the start. She just wants this pain to go away to leave her alone for God.
Everything started when her mother went depressed and her grandmother died. “Its starts with the end”, that’s what someone said long ago. She loved her parents. She was the little girl every mother wishes; always nice, well behaving, excellent at school, never too loud, never too late. But that is long ago. Her mother started drinking, her dad was never home and her brother didn’t care at all. Finally she went depressed to but no one noticed because she hid her emotions deep inside. She was known by the police, she drank way to much alcohol she, started to take drugs. At the beginning she took soft drugs like marihuana, then she took ecstasy and LSD, finally she got intravenous drug addicted. But she came back to the surface; she stopped with the drugs when it was the worst. She didn’t need any help. She has done it on her own. But she was still depressed and she felt no way better than be for.
Suddenly it started raining and she stopped meditating. She noticed that she lay rolled-up and that she was crying. She sat up and dried her face. “I won’t go back home today” she thought as suddenly she felt her cell phone vibrating in her trouser pocket. It was Alex. She really liked him, he was like her brother, and he cared about her. Maybe he saw her running away and he’s worried now. “I bet he’s staring out the window” she said to herself as she got the phone. “Hey dude”, she said trying to sound normal “what’s up?”  
- “I want to know where you are right now”
- “Well, hums. I went for a little walk”
- “Don’t lie to me Cyn. I don’t think you go for a walk for 4 hours running down the street. Neither I could run behind you. You were faster as I.” Shit. So she’s been here for 4 hours “Tell me where you are or ill run through the whole city and search you.”
“Meet me at the park access” she said as she hung up. “Shit” she repeated to herself hundreds of times. Quick she cleaned her face and tried to look normal. If Alex knows she has been crying he would question her again and she doesn’t want that.4

After 10 minutes he arrived at the park access and saw her sitting on the park bench. She smiled and he immediately knew she had cried.
-Sweetie what’s wrong?”
-“Alex, don’t call me sweetie. I don’t like it. I’m not sweet at all. I’m ugly”
-”Hey, I’m gay but I know that you’re not ugly. You have beautiful eyes but I miss the twinkle in it”
-“Is that everything you wanted to say?”She answered kind of annoyed.
- “No. I want you to come with me to my place. It’s late and I don’t like it to know you’re outside here.”
-“Can’t you just leave me alone?”
-“Nope.” He laughed and hugged her.”Now move your ass in my bed”
-“Hey!!”
-“I’ll sleep on the couch.”5

The conversation was over and she followed him to his place. He understands her but he doesn’t know about anything in her live. She feels bad.
She slept there and he carried all the time about her. He never left her alone. Not a whole minute. She wasn’t even allowed to go alone downstairs to get to the toilet or to get something to drink.6

The next day she sneaked into her house and went to her room and hoped she didn’t wake her brother and his girlfriend. Her parents went working. ”I bet they didn’t even notice I came not home yesterday”
She next days were normal. Even if she didn’t talk or make any sound, it felt normal for her.7

Then, one day everything went worse. Her mother was so drunk that beaded her again. The girl was so angry and sad that she saw no way out. She ran again out of the house in the middle of the night. But this time she wasn’t running to the little footbridge. She ran further, to the white water. It was autumn and it rained a lot so water was even more aggressive. “The water should be cold.” She thought while staring down the hill one hand clinging to the cold, frozen metal from the balustrade.
She climbed down to the ground. She felt a mixture of sweet, inky black and cold, cruel white on her feet. Her thoughts were running through a marathon.
“They have forced me to this point. It’s their entire entire fault. They’d never cared about me. I bet they will even notice I will be gone. I’ll finally meet my love in heaven. I’m going to wait for him.”
She jumped into the cold dark water. The air rushed pastes her as she fell. She gasped as the water met her soft skin, knocking her breath away. Dirty water filled her mouth and her lungs. She gulped it down eagerly, unable to wait for the afterlife to come. Her heavy clothes weighed her down and dragged her deeper into the water. Soon the rapids ended, leaving her to be pushed along in the current. Her lungs burned, hungry for the oxygen that they would not receive. It would only be a few minutes longer now. The temperature kept her from feeling most of the injuries I’d received from the rapids.
Suddenly she realized what she has done. “I’m such a selfish whore” she thought. Trough it was to late. She started fainting. Her mind was filled with disgust to herself. She felt how she slowly got separated from her body. Then everything went dark….8

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She slowly opened her deep drown eyes. She was in a bright white room. She was surrounded by humming machines. She closed her eyes again.10

Suddenly she heard a stranger voice. He was calling her. She hardly opened her eyes again. She was looking to her loves eyes. How did he get here? Did he die too?
-“Hey beautiful.” He whispered softly
-“Are you dead too? ” she asked with a weak voice. “What a pity. At least I wanted you to enjoy life.”
“Everything will become right. Don’t worry. You’re not dead. You just have to hold onto life.”
She did what he said. And she survived.