Mister Seymoure-The rewrite.

I was sitting there in that stupidass classroom.1

Its stupidass walls covered with stupidass posters about teamwork and how winners never quit and quitters never win were staring at me. 2

One word to describe the whole room was stupidass. 3

I hatehatehate this stupidass room.4

I was just waiting for fat stupidass Mr. Seymoure to waltz his fatass in there. 5

So far, I was the only one in the stupidass classroom.6

Then Erica FINALLY walked through the door.7

“Hey bulldyke,” I said to her.8

“Stop or I'll lick your mother,” she responded.9

I looked at her with quite a disgusted look on my face, picturing her doing yucky lesbian things with my mama.10

She was definitely what you would call butch.11

Her hair was in a dykespike and she dressed mainly in flannel shirts and cutoff jeans.12

Erica was quite the ladies woman.13

I guess it was her multiple tongue piercings.14

While I was lost in thought about the sheer dykeness of my bestest friend, HE walked in.15

HE is Taryn.16

HE is gorgeous.17

HE is six feet tall.18

HE is muscular without being gross and huge.19

HE dresses his fine ass with the tightest jeans, the coolest shirts, and hella awesome kicks.20

HE has the best hair, perfectly messed up and purple.21

HE has one ring through his lower lip.22

I am Johnny.23

I am not gorgeous.24

I am only 5'4.25

I am too skinny.26

I wear my 13 year old sister’s pants because my father does not approve of buying me women’s clothing.27

I have black hair that my mama wont let me dye.28

I have no piercings because my pappy is a douche bag.29

I have had a crush on Taryn since I was in fifth grade.30

HE walked hand in hand with his best friend, Natalie.31

All the straight boys want her32

She’s pretty much hot.33

And if I’m saying it, its gotta be true.34

Because I wouldn’t go near a vagina if my life depended on it.35

She had the big tits, the perfect blonde hair, and the greenest eyes you’ve ever seen.36

Following them, were Cory (aka the evil whore ex boyfriend cow fucker) and Cody-the biggest douche gay basher on the planet-with his flavor of the week, Jamie.37

“Ugh,” I said at all of them.38

That was when HE sat his fine ass in the chair next to mine.39

My heart nearly stopped beating.40

“Hey,” HE said.