Painful Memory Chapter Two

okay... running away from Hayner does not help whatever is happening. But I need a place to think!My lungs were burning and I could still hear his footsteps.
"Dammit Roxas! Wait up!" Again with my real na- oh shit! I dodged around a giant vase and ran through Hayners room. The place was covered in camo! Too bad I did not have any on... I could just jump into his closet and blend in...
I dove behind his couch, and started climbing into an air vent. We had done this a million times before when we were kids, but Hayner had gotten a bit too big recently. Smiling, I crawled up the airvent towards the roof. 1

Roxas, how do you do that? Do what? I ask innocently. Like I never have any idea what he is talking about... You can always sneek up on people. Like a fucking midget ninja... Hey! I yell Just because I am not as tall as you does not make me short! You are just a giant! I told him, looking way up to his face. I was not even shoulder height to him. He just ruffled my hair and pushed me back into my seat, laughing.2

"Augh!" They are getting more frequent... just get up to the roof, roxas... then you can figure this out.
I kept crawling through the dark. Every couple of minutes, having to stop because there was a huge pressure in my head. I had one cut on my hand, but it only hurt when I sat there, feeling for it.
After about 20 minutes, I finaly got to the roof. I pulled off the air vent and crawled through. I did not bother to get up. I just crawled to the most secluded corner and sat there, with my head in my hands. What was happening to me? What were these, these things? 3

Come on Riku! We are meeting her in 5! We dont want to be late! I yelled to him. We might have to be, Sora. Look at your face. Riku shoved me towards a small waterfall, and a saw another boys face. He had my eyes, he was my height, but he had brown hair, even spikier than mine. Who is he? Why cant I get out? HAYNER! HELP ME! HAYNER!4

I recognized being in my world again, but I still saw his face... Sora's face... who was that?
I rested my head between my knees, and started crying. I stayed like that about 5 minutes before-5

Axel... I am sorry. I did not mean to hu- my words were cut off by his hand again. I I wrapped my arms around his neck, and he started crying. I dont want to lose you, Roxas. I cant. I dont care where you go. I am coming with you.6

I dont want this to happen anymore... I want it to stop! Please, god, or whoever is up there, make it stop! My head feels like it is about to explode! I dont know if I can handle this anymore! Where is Hayner?
"Hayner!" I tried to yell, but it ended up no more than a whisper. Fine. Plan B. I started crawling to the airvent again, making a note to thank Hayners parents for the design of the house. All I had to do was fall... The vent was coushined. I would survive. And Hayner Room was only one floor down.
I was on the edge of the vent, trying to make myself move, when I heard Hayner. "Roxas! Oh, thank God!" I turned around, towards him, and fell down. I tried to land on my side but i was not sure what side was safest7

How red do your cheecks get? "What do you expect? It is cold/" I told him, pushing him and his scent of spice away. It always clung to him. But that was good thing about him... 8

"Simple and Clean is the way that your making me feel tonight, its hard to let it go.." I heard some one say. Er, sing. And I could feel a warm, vibrating spot. I clucg closer to that, and the singing stopped. Crap. I did not want that to happen.
"Roxas?" The voice was happy... wait, that was Hayner! Thank God! Hayner! He can help. He can make me me.. get all of the images out of my head. I dont want to be Sora anymore. I want to be Roxas!
"Hayner..." I said queitly, crying for the... third? time that day. Point for Hayner... a million more if he can get this out!
"Thank God. Are you okay? Tell me the truth. Did you break anything?" umm...
"I dont know... my head is pretty fucked up. but the rest..." I was shifted, and my hair was parted.
" I dont see any blood..."
"Not blood. I see, I saw..." I sank into the fabric of whatever I was on. Soon, a pillow was under my head... but it was uncomfortable. Who makes pillows that hard?
"It is ok, rocky." He said, stroking my hair "it is all gone." He took a deep breath, and I relized I was on Hayners chest. But it did not scare me or anything. I kinda liked it. He made a really good pillow. I hugged him, and pulled him closer, into a more comfortable position. I could smell the licorice really well now... "Glad you approve of my pillow abilities. Or are you just a hugger?" Hayner asked.
"Sshhh. No talking. Only singing." I mumbled as his hand began rubbing my back. Soon I would be asleep...
"Roxas." He said after humming for a minute.
"Hmmmm nmmm hmm" I responded, because that was all i could get out...
"I am going to pick you up now." He said as I felt him leave. I made a disapointed noise and was picked up. I was not fazed, probably because when you are this tired nothing can... I just snuggled into Hayners chest again.9

We were walking down a really dark street... it is raining. Me and Axel are holding hands. That is the only warmth I feel right now.. all I can feel. Suddenly, I stop. Axel stops when I do, but I still get pulled forward a bit. "Axel..." I say... barely able to talk. "I- i'm going to leave for a while.." Immediatly, Axel is right there in front of me, wiping the tears off my face.
"Roxas.. you have to tell me. I can't help unless you tell me..."
I look at him, and trace the lines of the triangle tatoos on his face. "You can't." There. I said it. The truth. Axel can't help me any more...
Axel is angry now. "Roxas, I don't care what I have to do. I will fight to the death if I have to. I am going to protect you. Now tell me." He had that serious look on his face. The one not even Xemnas can say no to.
"I am not even supposed to know..." I tried, still. I did not want him to know it... I just wanted to warn him I would not be here in the morning...
"Well, you do! God dammit Roxas! Tell me!" He was angry... at me. He had not been angry since my first day, when I fell off my chair in the main room. He had to go get me. It was far enough down he had to portal...
"Di-diz and some new guy are going to.. to kidnap me. They are going to take all my mermories. I won't remember any of this. At least, for a while. But I think some might leak through... so I'll be fine. I'll remember you in my little cyber world...." I was babbling. I always did that when I was nervous... But then, Axel clamped his hand over my mouth. It sent me back a bit, but he caught me.
"Diz? DIZ? I swear to god, Roxas. They will not get any where near you! I am going to gaurd you, ok?! I am going to be right beside you the whole time! You are NOT going to just forget about us, about
YOU."
I moved his hand away. I did not want to say this but i had too. "Axel... I'm NOT me. I am just part of Sora." And I broke down there. I sank to the ground. And I could not move, ecxept for when I was crying so hard my body was shaking. "And starting tomorow, I will be dying. I am going to be disapearing. Slowly, but it will happen. I dont own myself anymore. I can only feel what Sora does now." And through all of that, Axel knelt down and held me. He started crying too, but he made sure to comfort me.10

Crying. Who is that? Is it? Could it??
"Axel?" My voice sounds too eager! He will have fun with that... And it was a bit too scratchy too...
"N-no Roxas. It is me, Hayner. Did I hurt you?!" He looked at me, and I saw that determined look of Axels. He would wait forever for an answer.
"No. Why would you? All you did was..." I had to stop and remember.. it seemed like that was years ago. I remembered SO much about Axel... "Carry me."
"Ya. And a few minutes after I did, you started screaming, but you were asleep. What is going on Roxas? You have to tell me." Again, just like Axel... And i started feeling tears in my eyes. I knew he would never believe me, but I had to tell him... I had to let him know about Axel and Sora..
"Listen, Hayner... I'm not sure about all the details but... something is happening to me."11

ROXAS!12

Ignore the memory... it is just a memory.. wait, that wasnt axel... that was... DIZ?13

Roxas, you must not tell them!14

And hell I wont. "I have not lived here my whole life. I only figured it out recently. I have seen you try to figure it out too. Something about me does not add up. You look at me funny, and you-"
"What are you talk-" And he stopped. Literally. Everything around us froze, even him. The clocks did not tick, the hands did not move, the sound of Pence and Olette yelling my name stopped. There.was.nothing.15

Come to the struggle Arena. Immediatly.16

Why did Diz sound like a pissed off dad? ... And why did that worry me?17

"Okay, Roxas... I dare you too... "18

Ugh! Stop it! I already know about Axel, and Demyx, and every one else! Stop it! I know I have to go to Sora! I have to die today! Let me die sane! Fine! I'll go to the fucking struggle arena... if that will please Diz...
I took off running, taking one last look at my friends. I wanted to leave a note, but I doibted they would remember me...
I went throught the town, dodging Old ladys and carts. I hit one lady, but I stopped and pulled her back up... much to Diz's disapproval...
When I finally got there, I could see Seifer frozen in time, training for the match. Fuu was yelling at Rai about something... and vivi was... MOVING?! Vivi was coming faster towards me, running at me wit his struggle weapon. Now I knew that the littke guy was not very good, so all I did was step to the side. I dodged it, but he swung back around and hit me. That was IT! I had had TO MUCH happen in the past THREE HOURS! I was not about to let this useless.. kid beat me up! I ran by Seifer and grabbed the first weapon I saw... a traditional stuggle bat. I did a backflip and hit vivi right on the head. Hell yes! point for Roxas! But I was not about to show mercy. Maybe Diz was throwing me a bone. Doesn't want me to get rusty. Some of that might pass to SORA!
As I was thinking, I was hitting Vivi. One shot after another. He was literally twitching. This was worrying me for a second.. but then he pounced on me, comvulsing and growing out of his clothes. He was stretching and turning white! I started screaming and kicking, but there was no one to help.
"The keyblade!" I froze. Namine! "Use the keyblade, Roxas!" Dont say anything. Diz already knows you know about the orginization... does he know you know about Namine? Oh, shit! Vivi was turning into a dusk! How the hell do I summon the keyblade?! Then it just... happened. It exploded out of my hand, pulling itself toward the dusk. I simple let it do the work. The keyblade felt perfect in my hands. Like we had never been seperated. But this wasn't mine. It was all Sora...
Vivi exploded into a cloud of dust, and I started grinning. I had the keyblade back! Maybe I could get out!
"Roxas...?" The voice was tenetive... and it made me start hypervenalating. I turned where the voice came from, still forcing myself to breath, and clutching my chest.
"Axel!" I practicaly screamed as I tackled him. He still had the same scent of spice... He had not changed at all. His hips were still way skinny, and he seemed a bit girIlish; his too red hair still stood up to ungodly ends; and he still had the same look in his eyes. The one with me reflected in it.
"I told you i'd find you. Oh god, Roxas. You don't know how long I have been searching..." Then a flash of pain went through his face. "Do you really remember? Or is he telling you this?"
"I remember, Ax..." I said, almost crying. We were on the ground, and I was in his lap. Just like what we used to do. Only we were in giant chairs that were 50 feet off the ground."
"What is our bosses name?" He asked, a harsh tone in his voice. He really did not believe me...
"Wh-which one? Any one above your eight and my thirteen is our boss. But number one, superior, Xemnas, is the primary boss." I rattled off, like I had known forever.
Axel hugged me then, a hug so tight I could not breath. But the entire time I was just crying. Axel is back. Axel is here. He really can save me.19

Roxas! This man speaks nonsense!20

Oh shit. not again. please no no no...
"Diz! Show yourself!"Axel yelled, pushing me off him. He began looking around everywhere, pushing me into a corner and gaurding me. "Where the hell are you? You arent going to take him again, dammit!"
He appeared on the arena, smirking. "I have been here the entire time. But I must apologize. Roxas was not supposed to remember this soon..." He looked at me as if i disgusted him, and Axel moved a little closer to me. I knew he just wanted to help, but... would he really fight to the death? Why?
"Roxas, this man speaks nonsense. Trust me. Do you believe Hayner and Pence are just some figments? Or is this man, the one who appeared without explination the figment? What proof do you have to validate his statement?"
Axel tensed. I could tell he was worried about what came next. I heard him whisper "Don't let him decieve you. Believe what you think is real."
without missing a beat, I looked around Axel and at Diz... which was pretty hard considering how tall Axel was. "The proof is in my heart. Axel is real, and he is right here. I am going with him." Then I grabbed Axels hand. I could see the surprise in Diz's face. He did not know I had remembered so much. Then he recovered.
"Simple nobody. You do not have a heart."
"I hold half of Sora. Just as Axel holds half of his somebody. We have half of their hearts, and shape it to ourselves. We DO have hearts. And I am following mine."