Erick and Alice

I didn’t want to be late. The narrow hallways of Jefferson High School are always cramped with students squirming past each other, trying to get to their class on time. If you patiently let the sea of people carry you in their rhythmical waves of movement, you still went to class tardy. Fortunately, I had the genius idea of taking the stairs outside, even though it was raining. I walked out to the patio, and noticed the sky inked with gray and the darts of rain bouncing off the cement, soaking the insides of my shoes. I took long strides towards the stairs, trying to get out of the rain sooner. I was in such a hurry that I didn’t bother to hold on to the white, cracked frosty rail, as I should have done. I also failed to pay attention to the dark figure ahead of me, who was also not holding the rail, calmly stepping from one step to the next. Doesn’t he have to get to class soon? I wondered, losing focus on my footing. As I brushed past him, my shoe swerved on the slippery step. I yelped, dreading the suspense of wondering whether or not my hand would grab the rail. I watched painfully as my hand missed, looking like it was swatting the rain instead, and in a few moments we were both tumbling down the steps. When my back hit the floor I just laid there, still in shock. I felt the iced droplets of rain jab my cheeks and the water on the cement sink through the fibers of my clothes. I had to close my eyes so that I wouldn’t flinch every time a dagger of water came towards me, and for a moment I wasn’t at school. I was somewhere far away, but not here on Earth. I then heard a scratchy voice that came from above me, which was when I realized where I was: laying on the school blacktop below the steps, the rain seeping through my clothes. I stood up and made my way inside. The water from my shirt began to drip onto the white tiles of the hall, and I found myself in a panic, twisting the ends of my clothes to drench the water. The door close behind me, and I didn’t bother to look. The same raspy voice that brought me back to reality was there, and he said, “I thought you fainted or something. Why would you just lay there in the rain?” 1

I still didn’t turn. I moved towards the ends of my pants now, trying to wring the denim. “Are you deaf?” When he asked this question I spun. I saw locks of brown hair tucked behind his ears, the strands damp. His emerald eyes seemed to twinkle in the flickering ceiling lights, and his long lashes curled above his eyelids. I then stared at his lips that were round and full, with a modest peach tint to them. Ew, was the first thing that came to my mind, and when I was about to reply, he said impatiently, “Well, are you?” 2

“Apparently not.” I retorted, lowering my eyebrows so that I can feel the folds of skin that form around them. I felt like I knew him. But in truth, I had never seen him before. He raised his arms to scratch the nape of his neck, and asked, “Are you okay?” His eyes were full of sincere concern. I nodded, and whirled on the heel of my shoe, realizing how late I must be. “I have to go to class,” I announced, pushing my shoulders back. “Don’t we all,” he muttered. I looked back and saw him walking a few steps behind me. “I also might as well walk with you,” he said under his breath, and I slowed down. I don’t know why I did. I don’t know why I didn’t take a longer stride or gallop my way to class. Instead I took my time walking with this stranger, whom I barely knew and who I would remember for the rest of my life. 3

Days passed, and I saw him often. I would be pushing my way through the halls and I would see him, calmly letting the tide take him to where he needed to be. And he always saw me. It would be one of those moments where you lock eyes with someone from across the room, and you don’t notice any of the movement around you. It’s just you and that person, and that’s how I felt about Erick. My heart tingles every time his hand grazes mine, and every time his lips arch into a smile, a chill runs down my spine. There was a day where his hand didn’t graze mine; instead he held onto it, dragging me with him. I didn’t resist. As we were carried to the end of the hall, he asked me to go eat dinner with him. My nostrils inhaled his scent of sandalwood and cinnamon, trying to remember the smell. I nodded my head, dazed. 4

We went to a Pizzeria, and even though I expected a fancier restaurant, it was perfect. My stomach churned at smelling the melted cheese of the pizza sizzling on the tomato sauce. He practically wolfed down the pizza, and I can’t blame him. It was delicious. I ate my slice with slow, cautious bites. I couldn’t stop thinking about how I was here, sitting across from him. I wiped my face constantly in case of red sauce being smudged on it, and I licked my teeth so that there wouldn’t be anything between them. Why was I so conscious about the way I looked? If he liked me, he liked my personality. I shouldn’t be worrying about the way I looked…but I am. When we had both finished, it was a bit awkward. An odd silence crept on my shoulders as I watched him wipe his mouth with the napkin. He missed a spot of tomato sauce on his cheek, but I didn’t point that out. “That was good.” He said, placing his napkin on his plate. I nodded, and waited for what came next. “What kind of music do you listen to, Alice?” he asked. “I like The Smiths, Guns n Roses, Pantera, White Snake…” I replied, giving him a long list of my favorite bands. When I finished he nodded, and he and I discussed these. It turned out that he liked them too. 5

From that night on, we went out for at least once a week. We would go to different places; we sometimes went to the arcade, bowling, ice cream, the park, or we just hung out. Once we went to go see a scary movie. It was rated R and I was terrified about seeing it, though I didn’t tell Erick. Halfway through the movie I noticed that my hand was clutching his. My faced burned with embarrassment. I felt my hand begin to perspire lightly, and I was about to let go until he gently squeezed my hand. With that squeeze my spirit seemed to lift, and I wasn’t embarrassed anymore. In fact, I would grip his hand purposely. And since that night at the movies, our relationship had escalated. He began to sneak kisses on my cheeks that eventually led their way to my tongue, and his hands explored my body. I let him. I enjoyed the sensation of his rough fingers caressing my skin. 6

Erick and I thought about our future. We planned it out, even. We would live in Los Angeles, teaching our children the alphabet in our two-story house. The house would be freshly built and painted white, and we’d have particular etchings engraved on the walls. Our lawn would be a vibrant green and feel like plush beneath our feet, so we wouldn’t have to wear shoes to walk on it. Erick would build our kids a tree house in the oak tree that would tower over our house. I could picture it now; we’d be one big happy family. 7

One afternoon Erick and I were sprawled on the grass of the park. It prickled my legs and my elbows were itchy because I had pressed them to the ground. As we both stared at the pale blue sky, an idea suddenly popped in my head. Why not introduce him to my parents? Our relationship was serious, and in a few years we both planned to marry. Why not get him acquainted with my family? As I told this to Erick, he smiled. “I was wondering when you were going to ask,” he said, kissing me fully on my lips. 8

The next day Erick and I had planned for him to be at my house at 7:00. We’d have dinner with my family and talk. I explained this to my parents, and they agreed. “Honey, I’m glad that you’re going to show us this young man,” her mother said, washing plates. Her hands moved in a circular motion, her fingers wrinkled by the water. “I’m glad too, mom. I know you’ll love him. He’s perfect. He…” “I’ll see for myself tonight. Have you told your father?” she asked, drying the plate. “I will, when he comes home.” My mother nodded, and as she put down the plate, she walked over to me and embraced me. “Alice, dear, I’m very happy that you’re going to show us this gentleman, but, may I ask why? I know you’ve had previous boyfriends in the past and none of them actually had stopped by.” I didn’t have to think about that question. My lips were already moving before I could think of anything. “Because he’s special.” 9

That night I was in a state of frenzy. I couldn’t arrange my hair in the right way, no matter how many minutes I stood in front of my vanity. I combed my hair with one technique then experimented with another. My hand soon exhausted itself, clutching the handle of the hairbrush. Before I knew it the clock read 6:55, and I immediately rummaged through my clothes. What do I wear? A skirt, a dress, a tunic, a blouse, what? I eventually threw on a dress that suited the occasion. As I flitted down the staircase, the doorbell rang. I knew it was Erick. I ran to the door, smelling the honey roasted ham and mashed potatoes that awaited us in the dining room, and I couldn’t wait. I knew my parents would love him. He would come to my house often, and they would know each other so well, they wouldn’t say no when we chose to marry. 10

I opened the door, and saw Erick. He had on a pair of slacks and a faded dressing shirt. I smiled at him ecstatically, my heart nearly combusting out of my chest. “Hi,” I exclaimed, wrapping my arms around him. “Hello,” he mumbled, kissing me. I had that strange rush go through me again. “Let’s go to the dining room,” I muttered, pulling my lips away from his. I grabbed his hand and led him to the dining room, scanning the room for my parents. My father was seated at the head of the table, and my mother seated beside him on his right. My father motioned for Erick to be seated beside him on his left, smiling. My mother, however, stared at Erick bug-eyed. I saw Erick smile uneasily at her, probably wondering why she was gaping at him. 11

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Mr. and Mrs. Sherman. I’m Erick,” he said, extending his hand. My father smiled broadly, and said, “Erick, I admire your character. It’s a pleasure to meet you too.” They firmly shook hands, each grinning from ear to ear. As Erick turned to shake my mother’s hand, she gave him a limp, lifeless hand, contradicting her usual firm handshake. She then turned her head towards my dad, and said, “Richard, may you go get my purse? I left it in the kitchen.” He cocked his head in confusion, and replied, “Your purse? We’re eating dinner!” My mother gave my father a harsh look, and squinted. “You know what I mean,” she said. My father nodded, and got up and left the dining room. 12

I was confused. Why did she have my father leave the dining room? Why was she looking at Erick with such disgust in her eyes? If she dared to offend him, I already have bullets of accusations to shoot her with. As I held Erick’s hand I watched as she crossed her legs and folded her hands calmly on the table, her eyes still filled with odium. She then let out a deep breath, and I saw Erick’s eyebrows furrow. 13

“Alice, honey, sit. You too, Erick.” Her voice seemed to fall when his name rolled off her lips, which I knew wasn’t a good sign. My mother closed her eyes, then inhaled through her nostrils, and began. “I would have never thought that today would be the day that I would have to discuss this with you, Alice. But I can’t hide the truth forever. When I was with your father, there was a time in our marriage where not all was pleasant. I thought he was cheating on me.” She took another breath, and continued. “So, I decided to get him back. I had an affair. And in that affair, I had a child. A year later, I bore you. The child from that affair was you, Erick. I still keep in touch with your father, and he’s shown me pictures of how you’ve grown over the years. But this…I would have never guessed that you too would actually fall in love.” My mother buried her face in her hands. 14

I was still letting it sink in. I’ve been in love with my half brother? I’ve been kissing him and…oh God. We instantly let go of each other’s hands. I felt like jumping into a tub of hot, steaming water and letting it raw my skin. Instead I stood there, still in shock. Erick, I saw, wiped his lips, and said, “I had no idea, Mrs. Sherman…Excuse me.” He leaped across the room, and ran through the door. 15

My face boiled, and suddenly I was crying hysterically. Hot spit and sweat crept on my face, and I hiccupped. I couldn’t believe that he was my half brother. We had our future planned out… We’ve done so many wrong things, things that brothers and sisters shouldn’t do. As I cried, I wiped my lips in angst. “But…I loved him!” I managed to say through my hysteria. I should crawl in a hole and never come out, I thought. Oh, and rumors will spread. When we don’t talk to each other on Monday, then what? 16

I didn’t notice that my mother was still sitting there, her faced in her arms. She looked up, and said with authority, “Enough, sweetie. I won’t be able to deal with this…this town will remind me of this, and we’ll get a bad reputation. We are going to move out of here, soon. I’ll tell Richard.” She got up slowly from where she was sitting, and made her way to the kitchen. 17

In less than a week we left the house. We moved with my aunt in her large apartment for about a month, and then we finally got our own place in that area. It was freshly built and painted white, and it had particular etchings engraved on the walls. Our lawn had a vibrant green and felt like plush beneath our feet, and we could walk without our shoes on.18

I hated it. 19