Pride

I never thought I'd need someone. I didn't cling myself to people because I knew how horrible human beings could be; can be. They are mean. But then she came. No, I didn't change my mind about human beings, after all, she made me hit the bottom, crawl to her, spend nights awake, wasting tears... But yes, I changed as a person, I needed someone for the first time, I fell in love so deep and I doubt I'll ever find a way back.
I'd had crushes before, but I'd never throw myself in bed, while I'd cry a river of tears, like I used to everytime something went different than I had imagined with her.
When I saw her, I had to put aside whatever I was doing to watch her. The time would go by and watching her and saying hello to her made me like her. I remember telling a friend of mine she was just another woman I'd soon forget.
Days flew by and I couldn't get rid of her. She was always around and I enjoyed that. We had a superficial relationship: we'd say hi, talk about nothing and say 'see ya'. It was perfect for someone like me. Days kept flying by and I felt like I needed more. I'd die if I admitted it, but I knew that, for the first time, I was loving someone. Late at night, I'd fall asleep thinking of her. I'd wake up and she was the one to put a smile on my face. I knew all that bullshit books and poems talk about were real and they were happening to me.
But I found out time flies and life follows it. I didn't feel ready to tell her half the feeling that consumed me at night for not having her in my arms. I was stupid wanting to fake I didn't need her when she was exactly what I needed. But our superficial chats didn't go further than that. She never knew I saw her as more than just another woman. Nobody ever knew I learned how to love. And I never learned how to forget her.