My dream

It was one of those spectacular Summer days where the sun was scorching hot and everyone was making the most of it. The green grass at the park looked like a beach; adults were lying about on towels reading books and kids were playing ball games next to them. You could just make out the bottles of sun cream sitting next to everyone, alongside their bottles of water and sunglasses.1

The grass edge surrounded a large lake which was calm and reflective. The smooth surface sat virtually undisturbed with no ripples until one of the kids jumped in. In the distance there were people doing water sports, some on little speedboats and some trying to water-ski. Despite the number of kids there it remained remarkably peaceful.2

I sat back against a tree, always being one who preferred to be in the shade, and took out a book. Just as I was getting into it, an ice cream van pulled up near me and disrupted my peace as children flocked to it noisily. I decided to get up and find another spot.3

As I walked along the water's edge I heard the whirring sound of a speedboat getting closer to me. At first I didn't take much notice but within seconds it sounded like it was right next to me. I turned to look and felt my mouth drop open, speechless, at the sight I was met with. There on the speedboat was my grandmother, she was the ripe old age of 74 and very frail. She sat in the speedboat with just a cotton nightdress, pale pink with little yellow flowers on it covering her tiny frame, and smiled at me.4

"Aren't you going to get in Ellie?" she asked me.5

Still I stood there speechless.6

"Close your mouth, you will catch flies," she said laughing.7

I still couldn't speak. This was a bizarre sight, an old woman in a nightdress, in the middle of the lake on a speedboat. Where had she even got it from? Why did nobody else seem to notice this?8

My grandmother had always been a quiet and private person. She was never loud, always very proper. A real lady if you like. I knew over the past few years she had done some strange things, but that was due to having developed Alzheimers disease. She was senile and for the past three years hadn't even known my name; and now here she was on a speedboat? It didn't make sense!9

"Grandma, where did you get that boat from?" I slowly asked.10

She laughed again. "I borrowed it sweetheart."11

"Borrowed it?" I replied, raising my brow. "From who?"12

"Does it matter dear? We don't have much time, are you going to get in?" She asked softly.13

I nodded my head and she pulled the boat to the edge so I could jump in. The little boat rocked and I took a seat. She started the engine back up but did not go fast, we just slowly floated across the lake. For a few moments we both sat in silence.14

I cleared my throat to speak, one question really bugging me that I had to ask.15

"Grandma, how come you remember my name?"

She looked at me with such gentle eyes, the eyes I remembered seeing as a young child. Her nightdress had blown up slightly revealing her old legs tinged blue from varicose veins. Her skin was paper like with it's soft wrinkles and almost translucent appearance.16

"I never forgot it Ellie, my brain just got a little fuzzy and tired for a while. I could never forget my first and only granddaughter."17

She leaned towards me and cupped her hand under my chin. For a moment we just looked at each and smiled, then all of a sudden she pulled the gear stick hard and we were flying across the lake. The wind was blowing my hair everywhere and she was laughing in a demonic way like a woman possessed. Had I still been a child I would have been roaring with laughter at this, but I was terrified.18

"Grandma, Grandma!" I shouted through the wind, but she didn't seem to hear me. "Please Grandma, slow down, let me drive, I'm scared!" I screamed to her, but she didn't even look around.19

I held on as tight as I could to the side of the little boat and watched as we continued going in a straight line. Up ahead was the bank of the lake, with people lying there, kids playing. It looked like we were heading right for it. I could hear my voice screaming, people on the grass could hear me screaming, but Grandma didn't even acknowledge me. Instead she sat with a little brooch in her hand, polishing it slowly but repeatedly with the corner of her nightdress; that sad confused look had returned to her face, that look I had grown to know so well from the Alzheimers.20

But we were getting so close to the edge and I tried to move past her to take control of the boat. She wouldn't budge and I couldn't quite reach. I felt her cold, frail hand sit on top of mine and give it a little squeeze.21

"Don't be scared child, it's all going to be OK," she said looking right into my eyes.22

We were still travelling at high speed and were now just ten metres or so from the edge. I stood up and jumped off the side of the boat, plunging into the cold lake. When I resurfaced I saw the boat lying upside down on the edge but there were no people next to it. In fact, there were no people anywhere, the whole place was deserted. I swam to the edge and pulled myself out, running to the boat. It had a big crack at the front of it and was empty but the grass appeared to have a wet trail leading from the boat. I followed it for about 100 feet before I came to some bushes. As I got to the back of them my Grandma lay there, peaceful with her eyes closed. I knew she had passed away.23

The moment was heartbreaking and yet so calm. I didn't cry loudly, just a few quiet sobs as I stroked her hair. Somehow I already felt like I had said goodbye and now was just a quiet moment alone together, just the two of us that nobody else could interrupt. I sat there for several minutes, perhaps even an hour and just looked at her, making mental photographs of what a beautiful woman she was. Then, with a gentle kiss on her forehead I whispered goodbye, and walked home alone.