Dear Diary,1
I bet you're suprised to see me back again, thought I was dead, hell maybe even wished it? I know I still do. It was a week ago, I should be dead. In the ground, or the morgue, or somewhere! The doctors said I was lucky to be alive...they don't know that my life is hardly worth living. Luck...what a fucking rip off of people's better judgment...There's only life...death...and the strange ability for people to piss you off. Or those are my three aspects that I find to be guaran-fucking-teed. The counselors the judge made me go to aren't helping, constant surveillance isn't helping. NOTHING is helping. The only time I feel complete is right when I get done crying. The tears help to wash away the sadness. Some may cut themselves, "See how much they bleed", yeah right...that shit doesn't help me at all. Trust me I tried it. Got caught. More counseling. In all fairness though it was my own fault for still being alive. Should of chose something that was more subtle...A knife across the jugular, a bullet in the brain... Too late for regrets!!! Honestly I don't know why I am the way I am. If I knew what was wrong I sure would try as hard as I possibly could to fix it.2
Mom cried. Even Dad cried. First time I've ever seen my father display any emotion about anything. It was probably one of the worst and greatest moments of my life to see that man crying. I knew it was because of me he was crying, but I also knew that it was because he actually did care for me, a kind of love you could say. I try to help myself, its just so hard. Nobody else understands the torment I'm going through, Diary. I'm so scared and alone. I wish someone would come and shine a light into my darkness. 3
Sincerest Wishes for a better tomorrow,4
B.V.5
Author notes
Once again this is completely fictional...DO NOT call me asking If im ok...because everything is peachy. lol thanks for reading.
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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This is an awesome part 2. He's still feels tormented but you can feel the slightest light of hope in the last few words of this entry. It makes me want to reach out and help him. Nice job, you've once again reached my heart.
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I found you-- AGAIN! Haha.. okay, but really, I like the writing you have. Haven't read through all of it, but the bit I've seen. Yay. ^^
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This is really getting interesting. I hope there will be a part 3. You should make this into a book or something. I have so many questions: who is he? what happened to make him this way? how long has he been like this? what will happen to him to change it? will he eventually will himself to death? You simply must write more now that you have me hooked. Thanks for posting this. Keep up the good work!
Sheryl -
Nice! I've always thought that if you felt bad enough to kill yourself failing to kill yourself isn't going to help things much! Wish I had words of encouragement or something to say that would help but I've been looking for those words for myself for years and years and years...take a look at something of mine sometime ok? I'd like to get your opinion...by the way, wonderful use of monologue...i like the diary approach
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I'll shine a light into your darkness any day....I mean, I dunno, I dunno.
Don't like this one as good as the first. Sounds crazy in this one. Tormented in the last one. -
Wait, nevermind. Not sure why I thought the initials were different. Coulda sworn they were but I just checked and they're not...lol, sorry about that, poem still rocks.
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I really like the second entry that displays the author's thoughts along with a little more background and inner feelings as a counter to the first entry that was all action. I also like that the initials are different. That's cool. You've earned my applause.
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fantastic as usaul!
yet agen u cease to amaze me! a fantabulous 2nd part to the dear diary... definetly like the way its showing raw emotion... ooo sooo darn good. I dnt think words can explain how great that was!
well done
much love
Jess
xxx
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