Standing alone on that street corner, I was beginning to doubt the wisdom of my plan. By the light and warmth of my bed that morning, it had seemed a clever, well thought-out inspiration. But now that it was in action, I felt the overwhelming impulsiveness of it. Sighing, I tried to shake those thoughts from my head. The bulb of the lamppost behind me had burnt out, and I leaned my back against the useless thing, feeling the bite of frozen metal even through my layers of winter clothes. The pole felt frigid, pressed against my palms.1
I wiggled my fingers across the pole’s ridges. Exhaling, I could see my breath turn into visible crystals. If I tilted my head skyward and puffed out at just the right angle, the crystals blurred my sight. Not even a split second later, though, and they were gone.2
A long shadowy figure appeared behind them and I jumped. It spoke in a man’s voice.3
“Sorry,” said the voice I knew so well.4
“ You coulda’ given me some warning,” I remarked, then shrugged, trying to keep the cold out of what I said.5
“Yeah...”6
“Yeah...” I shuffled my feet. Puffed out and followed the crystals up into the air. This was not in the script.7
You see, when I’d seen this conversation in my head, it was pretty smooth. But now, my carefully rehearsed words had vanished. Not to mention the responses I was getting were not quite what I’d imagined. 8
“So...” seemed he was a little at loss too. “Why the random night meeting?”9
“The night’s cool,” I replied, perfectly aware that I was dodging the question. Knowing that he knew it too.10
“Cool is an understatement,” was the reply. He never was a winter man.11
We stayed that way for awhile. Looking at the sky above, the concrete below, random puffs of icy breath. Anything but each other. Afraid to know what was in the each other’s eyes, I suppose. It was definitely getting cold outside, but I wasn’t sure it was the weather. 12
“‘Guess you can just about figure out what I wanna say...” I mumbled. There was gum on the cement, and on better days it might have been green..13
“Guess you could always lemme know, if you want to,” he replied. A pause, then the guilt trip, “I did walk all the way out here to hear something, right?”14
Still not looking up, I took a deep breath and started. “It’s just uh...you know.”15
“Yeah, I do know,” and then the voice itself didn’t sound so cold anymore. I exhaled, and looked up. Was it me, or was he attempting a smile?16
“It’s been awhile since I’ve seen one of those,” I said, referring to the smile, and forgetting that he could not read my thoughts.17
“It’s been awhile since I’ve tried one,” he replied. Maybe he wasn’t so far away, after all.18
I picked up a sharp crackling noise, and suddenly the air around me was illuminated with light. I jumped away from the lamppost and looked up. Apparently the dead light bulb had rejuvenated itself. 19
And just like that, I knew that I didn’t need to say anything. He knew full well what I thought, and no words could really express it better. And for that, I thanked him and the light and the gum at my feet. I thanked it all for being a part of this moment, right then.20
I stepped forward, let go of the icy lamppost, took his hand, and started walking. It wasn’t much warmer, and I knew the light would die again, but right then, right at that moment, it was fine by me.21
Author notes
Something I needed to type up for English class. Length and style were dictated, but I played with the rest. I'm aware of the fact that it's pretty much plotless, but I was just playing with tone and imagery. Anyone who wants to lemme know what they think will be thanked. In fact, be cruel if you wish, I can accept any type of criticism to make it better.
Oh, and as for the topic...nothing really personal to me. Just a scene going through my head. Got an interpretation, you can go for it. I have my own as well.
Thanks for reading folks,
Amanda
BTW, am in bad need of a title. Not even sure if contentedness is a word 
Help me.
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
1 - 21 of 21
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Overall, this moved well. I didn't find too many examples of superfluous verbiage or cliche. One line I didn't like, though, was: "It was definitley getting cold outside, but I wasn't sure it was the weather." The reader knows that it is ALREADY cold outside, so to say that it is GETTING cold, and then making an obvious twist on the different ways we use the word 'cold', seems a rather cheap play on words. Perhaps just reiterating that it was cold, somehow, would be less blatant and distracting.
Also, try to give these characters different voices - to make it all seem less flat. Maybe you intended for these characters to be very similar people, but in something this short its a little dull.
As for a title, if you even sort of like "contentedness", maybe just shorten it to "content". If you want something different, just consider the various important pieces of this story (winter, lampost, light, cold, warmth, darkness) and a title might just come to you.
Keep up the good work.
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I like the mystery that surrounds every aspect of the plot- you're right, it does make it pretty useless, but it's written with more zeal and talent than many stories that are choking with storylines. So, congratulations. Now you've got me wondering if contentedness is a word...it certainly is awkward, isn't it....Anyway, back to the mysteries that make it so delectable. The interesting part is- there's no real need to know anything about the characters' pasts or presents, except that they're here, and it's cold, and it was awkward but now it's better.
I'm a simple person, and I tend to oversimplify things, but this is one story I would be hard pressed to summarize. I did really enjoy it, it was the epitome of a short short story- one isolated incident, no real background mush to slog (speaking of made up words...o.o) through, and just enough imagery to make it real. This really is exemplary. 
beginning: 3, language: 5, plot: 2, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 3.
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WONDERFUL IMAGERY BUT IT COULD HAVE HAD A BIT MORE TO EXPLANE WHY THEY WERE MEETING THERE. EVERYTHING WAS EMPLYED BETWEEN THE TOO PEOPLE AND WHY HADN'T HE BEEN SMILING.
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Amazigh: By all means, if you have anything that you think you can contribute, do so. You sound like someone with an honest opinion, which I"m interested in hearing from,
Amanda -
TheNatalie: Gee, wonder what your name could be? Thanks for the comment, and for enjoying,
Amanda -
Chaos Reclaimed: Read it again, eh? Haha, so glad that you found it good enough, thanks much for reading,
Amanda -
Blue ISIS: Thanks for the comment, and I'm glad this was a story that sort of caused you to wonder. If you've remembered it still, then I"ll definitely be flattered
Amanda -
grannyeri: That's one thing I liked. At the time, I couldn't think of much of a complete story, so I just wrote what I thought. And I don't want to add more, it's a fill in the blank kinda story. What you want it to be, based on your life and experiences. That's what the background is. Thanks,
Amanda -
That's not an effect I'd thought of, but it's a good one all the same I guess lol. Thanks for reading,
Amanda -
Hmmm. Not my usual read. I cannot say yet, I will bookmark and read again later and come back.
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Awesome!
I liked it! And as the others said, Just couldnt stop reading it! I miiight read it again.
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Creativily written. Clearly pictured. Enjpyable write. Keep writing!
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What a great write! I loved the story! very clever and unique. loved every moment, it just made me want to read more! LOL!
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Makes me wonder about their past, and what's happened previously to bring them to this point. Were they lovers, co-workers, friends? Story leaves one wanting more. Liked this.
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I really liked this write, it made me feel safe and warm in my home. Great job
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I happen to like my name too. I'm glad you found it kind of interesting, but if you want to elaborate on "can't say nice write" than that'd be cool. Otherwise, thanks for reading,
Amanda -
Obit, first I have to say I love the name warrior hobbit, its just so scary. lol sorry, can't say nice write but it was kind of interesting, hope you got a good grade image and Visions
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The part where the man smiled or the part where they were talking of his smiling? In that, I was trying to give a sense of a relationship that was very close, I'm sure you know what I talk about. So close that sometimes they can tell what you're thinking. There's a rift, but it's not infinite. That's what I was getting at. Thanks for the critique.
Amanda -
Kash: Because of my assignment restrictions, the imagery is what I got to play with the most. And I'm very glad that it went over well. I had to write something personal, but I didn't just want a diary entry. I'm glad you found it impressive!
Amanda -
This was very well written. What Kash said is what I want to say. The imagery IS great and it was like you were inside the girls mind. I liked the dialogue between the two people, especially the part where the man smiled. Wonderful job, keep up the good work.
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Perhaps "Warmth in Winter" for a title? I can't think of any good ones either...
And, plotless, you say? :-D I think it portrays the best plot of all. You did very well with this, the imagery is stunningly real, and it doesn't seem narrated at all. It's more like I'm there inside the girl's mind, listening to her thoughts as they drift by. Very impressive.
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