The Awakening

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She opens her eyes but all she sees is darkness…she doesn’t know where she is or why she can’t see…she knows she is lying down in a bed and can feel bars on the sides, like a baby’s bed and she can feel a needle with a tube attached taped to her arm…2

“What is going on?” she hears herself saying though with a raspy voice she hardly recognizes. … 3

“Is any one there?” she calls out. Now she is really scared and starts calling for some one to come and help her…soon she hears footsteps and a voice says:4

“Well, my goodness…finally! You have been asleep for a very long time missy…just a minute and the doctor will be here to talk to you.”5

She’s afraid…she can’t see and doesn’t know where she is or even who she is…all she knows is she is afraid…more footsteps and a deep but not unpleasant voice says “Hello, we‘ve been waiting.” Now she really is scared!6

“Where am I, what’s going on, why can’t I see…” 7

“Whoa there…not so fast. I am Doctor Fitzgerald. Now can you tell me your name. We’ve had you listed as Jane Doe since there was no identification on you when they brought you in to the emergency. I‘ve been taking care of you since your arrival here at the hospital. 8

“My name? My name is…. Oh my God! I can’t remember …...” 9

“Shuuuush!” He says. “You’re going to be fine. We’ll talk later. For now just let me check you over, Make sure everything else is okay.”10

After a brief check up the deep voice explains to her that she has been in a coma for quite some time caused by a really hard bump on the head as the result of a mugging. He starts asking her questions and learns she doesn’t know who she is, where she is or even what she looks like. Since the doctor has not been able to learn any of this in the months she has been under his care he has as many questions as she has…but first he tells her a few things about her physical self hoping to allay some of her fears so they can proceed with the necessary mental care she is going to need. 11

He tells her she is probably between 45 and 55 years old, has lovely auburn hair with a few strands of grey and beautiful green eyes. He is not usually so descriptive to his patients but this one is special…He tells her she is tall and slim of figure, like a model. Something he noticed right away. She learns she had a suitcase filled with clothes of high quality and design, a portfolio with drawings of many different articles of clothing but no purse or any form of identification. The police searched the area for something that would tell them who she was but came up with nothing. She was brought here to Mercy General as Jane Doe patient and has been under his care since then. Hi tells her it is May in New York and the year is 1952 and she was first brought into the hospital New Year’s day. 12

He is not overly concerned with her lack of eye sight or her lack of memory, said it will return naturally within time. It is psychosomatic as a result of the trauma. He ask her if she remembered any thing before the incident.13

She lay there trying to conjure up some sort of memory but got nothing. This caused her to be come so stressed she started to cry. The doctor prescribed a mild sedative and told the nurse to remove the needle and tube from her arm. She would not longer need it. 14

“Don’t worry” he said. “It will happen” It is rare that a person does not regain their memory. It just takes time.” With that he picks up her hand and pats it gently and says good by. She hears him walk away. 15

She is afraid!16

The room is quiet as she lays there listening and wondering. She may have lost her memory but seems to have a heightened sense of hearing realizing she must be in a city since she hears constant traffic and horns out side her window. She hears the tapping of a typewriter just out side her door, different sets of footsteps clicking down what she perceives to be a hallway. As she lays there her eyelids get heavy, she closes her eyes, letting the din of the traffic lull her to sleep. 17

Soon she is again awakened by some one gently shaking her shoulder and telling her it is time to eat her dinner. She opens her eyes, gasp as she realizes she can see slight movement and dim figures in the room…looking around she seems to be surrounded by many figures in white. Slowly they all blended together into only two people. Someone carrying a tray of food and the one who shook her awake. Smelling the food she realized just how hungry she was. For months she had existed on liquid from a bag hanging beside her bed. 18

But first she had to explore this blurry vision she was getting…fascinated she kept trying to focus until finally the two figures became reasonably clear to her eyes…19

After telling the nurse she is able to see a little the nurse pushes a button which turns on the light over her door but out side her room, alerting the doctor that he is needed. He arrives shortly and re-examines her eyes…20

”See” he says. “I told you your vision will come back and it will continue to get better. Just be patient. . Now go ahead and eat your dinner so that we can talk a bit and do more checking after you finish off that delicious meal the staff prepared. Just be careful to not over eat since it has been a while that you tummy has seen any thing solid. We don’t want you to get sick first time out.” 21

With that he left her to go on his evening rounds. 22

She looked at her dinner tray and thought who in the world could ever over eat with that little bit of food on their plate. Smiling she picked up the spoon and started eating…Soon she realized that only a couple of spoonfuls of the soft food they had given her though tasty completely filled her up. Over eat, no way!23

Pushing away the dinner tray she lay there thinking of anything she could bring to mind…Hoping some image would trigger a thought or memory. There were hazy thoughts of cookies that brought nice feelings to her but then visions of vast water and being sick ..those weren’t so nice. Exhausted she again started to feel drowsy. How could she be so tired? 24

The doctor came as soon as he finished his rounds and the two of them sat and talked for a long time. He was quite handsome, looking to be about 60, maybe a tad younger. He, asking questions of her and she, asking questions of him. Some brought answers to both and some brought frustration to both but the doctor felt progress had been made. Saying good night again he patted her hand and assured her all would be normal soon. 25

The next morning when she opened her eyes her vision was again perfect. So perfect in fact she didn’t need her reading glasses any more. Not like when she was in school in Paris Wait, she needed reading glasses in the past! She was in Paris! Oh my Gosh! A memory. She is so elated she can’t wait to tell the doctor when he comes in. 26

A few more days pass by and the doctor said she was healed physically and was to be released from the hospital. She had continued to have flashes of memories; faint memories of sailing on a ship with her family, memories of happy times with her grand mother, living in a tenement in New York. Lots of memories of her early years when she was a young girl with dreams but the only memory of her grown up years was a faint memory of being in school in Paris. Just which school and why remained a mystery for the time being.27

What school? How did she get there and why and when? The doctor said not to worry, they would all return in due time. So she quit worrying and went about the task of picking up pieces of a life she could not remember. 28

She adopted a new name with the help of the friends she had made on the hospital staff. Her new name is going to be Iris Delaney. With that red hair and green eyes she seems to be of Irish decent and that seemed like a nice Irish name and would work until she finally remembers her real name. 29

With that decision made she checked herself out of the hospital, left with her only worldly goods, a suitcase of designer clothes and a portfolio of drawings and took a bus over to a rooming house not too far from the hospital. The one that was recommended by the head nurses at the hospital. It belonged to her Aunt and was clean and affordable, and comes with home cooked dinner each day and a private bath. 30

She had a small gift of money from a collection taken at the hospital and a loan from the doctor, she would have it no other way. Enough money, if she was frugal to see her through the next couple of months which would give her time to get back on her feet. What more could she ask for. 31

After getting settled in her new home she went on a job search at some of the agencies recommended to her by the staff that had taken such good care of her for five and a half months. 32

She may not know who she is or where she came from but she does know through gut feelings that she has always been resourceful and taken33

care of herself. And she can speak French, again the memory of school in Paris. Where it came from she does not know…but she is fluent in the language and will put it to good use. 34

Several months have passed, since Iris woke up in the hospital a blind and scared woman with no memory. The city is in a holiday mood with decoration on every street corner and carols floating playfully through the air. She still has not fully recovered and still doesn’t have enough memories back to know who she is and who she was but she is happy. 35

When Iris was released from the hospital she moved into her new home at the boarding house. After getting settled she found a job at a small deli near by. While working there, with many solitary evenings to fill, she discovered she had such a keen ability to draw the most wonderful couture dress designs…. and finally decided all the designs in the portfolio, that had followed her to the hospital and out again, must belong to her…36

…Fate smiled on her when one afternoon. After working for only a brief time at the little deli near her rooming house, she heard from one of the many French patrons that had befriended her, that they were interviewing for the position of ‘designing assistant‘. at the local art school right around the corner. She had passed by the school many times and had it on her list of places to explore but so far had not had the opportunity to do so. The person who had the job was taken ill and had to move back to her home out of state. 37

Following her gut feeling and acting quickly she ask for the remainder of the day off and gathered all her drawings, her portfolio and the suitcase of already sewn garments, changed into one of the designer dresses from her trunk that she had hung in her closet, ran over to the school and requested an interview. Not having any credentials didn’t stop her at all…she just stood her ground and insisted they would not be sorry for seeing her. Finally, after a long conversation in French she was able to get on the schedule for an interview that very afternoon when every one else was gone…She did not mind the wait at all. 38

She sat patiently and let her memories, the ones she had been able to recall, carry her away to a far away place where she was known to many for her talent. No name of her own ever came to her though and so far she had not remembered any names of people in her past life to jog her memory but she had hopes. In the meantime she just let those memories she did have loose to explore, hoping one of them would bring some light to her unknown life. She saw faces and remembered bits of conversations but not enough to be able to identify herself or any of her friends and acquaintances from her memories. Sometimes it was most frustrating but by keeping her frustrations in check and concentrating on what she could remember she knew that one day it would all be made right. 39

After a while the last of the scheduled interviews were over with and she was told by the secretary she could take her things and go on in. The head of the school was waiting to interview her.40

Picking up her bag and portfolio, brushing a stray strand of hair from her face and taking a deep breath she entered the office expecting nothing like what was going to happen. 41

There sitting behind the desk was a familiar face. A face from the past. One that brought tears to her eyes but she was not sure why. She sat the bags down, and quickly before she fainted sat herself down in the nearest chair and just stared. 42

Nicholas ran over and knelt in front of her…“Oh my God Kathleen !” he Exclaimed. “Where have you been.”43

She was stunned. She knows this man but why does she know him? Why does her heart feel like it is going to explode? Why can’t she remember? Why is he calling her Kathleen? Is that her given name?44

Finally after several moments of staring she regains her composure, asks him to listen with out interrupting and begins to tell him her strange story of waking up in a hospital with no memory, no sight and no idea of who she is or why she is apparently well educated and speaks French fluently but is living a life behind the deli counter making sandwiches when in her heart she knows she should be doing something more. Nicholas listens patiently, smiling, then frowning, sometimes nodding his head in agreement and other times in dissent but always with attention. 45

Then he began his story. As she listened to Nicholas all of her life in the form of memories came surging back almost overwhelming her in it’s intensity and bringing tears once more. 46

After more then an hour of sharing all the information they have between them Iris, oh but now she is Kathleen, finally learns some things about herself. Things she has been waiting for since leaving the Couture House in Paris she herself started by living on a shoestring, so many years ago . 47

Her name is Nichole Kathleen Ranae O’Leary. After growing up in the Hells’ Kitchen part of New York, her parents, seeing the immense talent she had were able to save enough money to pay for her to travel to France to further her education. Her mother had always said she would do some thing great. She attended art school in Paris and after graduating attained a position in a couture house where she honed her skills as a designer. After many years of hard work and frugal living she had enough know-how and money and backers to start up her own house of couture. Aptly called ‘Kathleen O’Leary Designs’ 48

She ran a successful line of designs that often made the list of ‘most wanted’ but always in the back of her mind was a nagging feeling that some thing was missing. Finally, after so many years she sold her design house and took a trip back to New York to see the old neighborhood and pay her respects to her parents graves, both died unexpectedly while she was abroad. With the communications not the best at that time she was not able to come home for their funerals. She knew her parents would have understood but now she was looking forward to the trip with much anticipation. 49

The day she had arrived in New York. She had just gotten out of a taxi when, after walking a few yards and stopping to ask a directions of two unsavory boys leaning on a broken down fence, some one came up behind her and smashed her in the head with a heavy object. The next thing she knew she woke up in the hospital with no memory of any of her life before. They took her purse with her passport, identification and money but placed no value in her drawings nor did they take the time to explore the beautiful fashions she had carefully packed in the small trunk. Other wise they would have been taken and ruined. Ten thousand plus dollars of couture dressmaking ruined. 50

She continued on, telling him all about her struggles to regain her memory and of all her interesting experiences after leaving the hospital. Told him of the nice people who had helped her along the way and all that had transpired before now…51

She learned from him that he was a dear friend she had met in France when she was still in the business and that he had ask her to come see him if she ever came to America. He knew she had sold her business but nothing of her reached his ears after that. She just sort of fell of the face of the earth. With no ties here and no relationships left behind no one realized she was missing. No one came looking for her. 52

The sun was gone and the street lights had long ago been turned on by the time Nicholas and Kathleen finally got caught up with their lives. As fate would have it Nicholas was the next one on Kathleen’s list of people to look up. Right after her ill fated visit to her old neighbor hood in Hells Kitchen. 53

There was no interview necessary after the long hello of two old friends. Nicholas owned the school and Kathleen, wanting to lead a simpler less stressful life had left Paris to come here and ask him for employment as a teacher of design. She had just taken the long away around. Now with both of them ravenously hungry they donned coats and left the office for a quiet meal at a fine French restaurant Nicholas knew about…54

Tomorrow was Monday. She would call Doctor Sean Fitzgerald. They had become good friends over the months and she had a standing dinner date with him on the first Monday of each month. Tomorrow was the first Monday! She could not wait to tell him all the good news since she last saw him. 55

Already planning what she would wear for dinner with Sean she thanked the fates that she did not get the generous breast she had so wanted as a child. If so she would never have been able to wear the beautiful garments, she learned from Nicholas, that she had designed and made for her models to wear in her runway shows in Paris. 56

She heads for the bath and a nice long soak in the tub. It’s late, she knows with all she’s learned today from Nicholas that she will have a hard time falling asleep but she needs to get up early tomorrow. She is going Christmas shopping and after that she finally has a life to explore, people to look up from her old neighborhood and some old friends left behind in Paris. They will be surprised to hear from her after almost a year. 57

She has a past! And now she has an even better Future! 58