What makes me feel like this!?

What makes me feel like this, this sick display of loneliness, invisible tears on my pillow case. The girl I love, who I can't bring myself to talk to, sucking every spot of sunshine out of my hollow heart. I stab at my wrist but the blood won't come, I wan't to spill my guts to her but I fear her response. I'll just keep making desperate suicide attempts until my carcass rots into these sheets. I'm just not worth all these girls that I meet, I don't deserve an ounce of attention, I haven't earned the love or affection. 1

These fuckers just can't see how hideous I am inside, I'm a sack of shit, dressed up in a tux with expensive cologne and a dictionary full of smooth words. So I'll feel like hell, while she's kissing his lips, their tongues tied in a sloppy knot of sleazy inabitions. 2

I don't give a fuck! I'll get wasted for the time being, and I'll let her see him for what he really is. And I'll laugh my ass off till her goddamn slutty heart is busted to bits. She'll know how I felt, she'll know how it hurts. That bitch will pay for what she did to me! She'll burn in hell for the shit she put me through. Then let's see who thinks life isn't goddamn fair. Like satan takes sad fuckers like her anyway, she's the queen of pissing people off, she thinks she's so damn amazing. I'm going to fucking slit that bitches throat, then see how she likes it.3

Fuck me, for my ranting, and fuck you for listening, that's all I had to say.4