1
Police watched the grainy footage of the security tape unfold. 23
A teen approached the counter of McDonald’s; he ordered and his meal arrived.45
He shuffled away with the tray, but seconds later, he flung his drink and raged around the restaurant.67
“Whatever is his problem?” 89
“It was the last straw.”1011
12
Author notes
For a contest. There are exactly 50 words - just don't trust the SW word counter - it is somewhat screwy.
A contest entry
- Can You Write a Story in 50 Words?? by KillerQueen.
225 points, ended October 7, 20 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - How Random Are You? by iCats.
175 points, ended November 8, 20 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Boredom.... by blackvamp.
175 points, ended November 8, 9 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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Haha the scary thing is that I can actuely see someone doing something like this and making a huge deal about it. =D
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Hey.
Firstly thanks for entering.
Hmmm, i'm not sure about this one. It actually makes sense and to me that means it isn't as random as it could be.
Thanks once again for entering best of luck.
Staci
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LOL nice!!!! It doesn't fit Staci's contest unfortunately..
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LOL that was funny. Good luck.
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awesome
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hahaha. this is a great play on words.. I was a litte confused in the beginning, but the end acutally made me laugh out loud. A rare moment indeed. Gotta love a piece that makes you smile.
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Velly Goot!
I reckon he ordered 10 McNuggets but only got 9! that would cause even the most rational person to act in such a way!
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Very funny!
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Haha this is great. I love it. Nice use of words etc! Good luck.
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I DON'T CARE
I will risk a Big Mac or a Whopper anytime...better than that Neuvelle crap laced with garlic...or the new chic Italien in the U.S. where a bowl of pasta and a "tri-colore" salad (worth about .25-.50) will run you $125. Or how about a nice slice of pizza (used to be .15 -.25) for a mere $2.00 ($2.50 with sausage or pepperoni)? So there was no straw...no napkins...no condiments. Let him bring his own next time. But keep him out of the chic garlic palaces. Imagine his upset at a $125 dollar check? In answer to your posed: "WhatEVER was his problem?" The contemporary culinary/dining out problems are cleverly secreted above. Many "last straws."
GA -
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$125? Wow, you lucky sod. I wish we could get food that cheap down here.
And $2.00 for pizza? Now I know why my friend likes America, all your cheap food.
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I thought this was really well written for under 50 words. It was both humorous and engaging. You did tell a story in that span and it had a double meaning which I found to be hilarious. Good imagery. So simple !! Good luck with the contest Blondie.
Cheers
Blair
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