Obsessed-Chapter 3

I looked at the pregnancy test, in a daze, oh my god, I couldn't be pregnant, I couldn't.  I had been having this crazy affair with Alvin for a year now. I was almost 22 years old, and even though I loved him, I knew that we weren't meant to be.  The more time that passed by, the more I started to believe that it was time to break it off with him.  I felt so horribly guilty, I couldn't do this anymore.  But every time I heard his voice it sent shivers down my spine, and every time I saw him, I melted. I wanted him there, then.  Our relationship was very sexual, and while sometimes we would sit and talk, or joke around, we always, always had sex.  We took it to the extreme, we had sex everywhere.  I was once a modest person, I'm not exactly skinny.  But he made me feel and do things I would normally never do.  Once we went to Deny's at 1am to eat something, he was working third shift, so he just called out of work.  We ordered our food, and I left to use the bathroom, he came behind me and whispered,"use the family bathroom." I opened the door, it was a single bathroom, large.  He came in behind me, and locked the door.  My pulse was beating fast, and I knew that he wanted me.  He came behind me, pushed me to the floor, on all fours, raised my skirt, and pushed my thong to the side, I wasn't even wet yet, and he forced himself inside of me, brutally ramming into, and thats when he began to talk."God, I want you so much, I need you all the time, if you ever leave me, I'll kill you Vivian, you drive me crazy." We orgasmed together, he stood up wiped himself off, washed his hands, kissed me and told me he'd meet me at the table. I stayed in the bathroom in a daze, I loved him, but this was getting out of hand.  I never asked him to leave Lisa, but I think I needed to talk to her.  Lisa never knew, and sometimes I'd wonder if she suspected anything, but we hadn't spoken in a long time, just as well, I didn't think I could face her.  My guilt was horrible, non existing at first, but slowly, it builded up over this past year.  Alvin was starting to scare me, recently he started to say he'd kill me if I left him.  He used to say it before but I thought he was just saying it. Now I began to wonder if he really would.  Its time that spoke with Lisa.1