The pain that lived with my family...

I want to tell you a story, a story that has never been told, the story of my family. 1

I was young, very young, I could not believe it when I saw it with my own eyes. It was my father, my own father, my own blood, he stepped into the house, looking fearful holding a knife, "I'm gonna end up this nonsense in my house especially you." He shouted pointing at my elder sister who was pregnant at the time. Hiding behind my mother who was walking toward my father to distract him. He wanted to kill my sister but accidentally stabbed my mother. 2

We cried and screamed, as my father checked her pulse and ran outside the house screaming "No!" until I could no longer hear him. The police came and took her body away.3

My mother was gone, she was dead. I was left with my sister who was HIV positive and she had a baby who was positive too. All the responsibilities layed on my shoulders, I was to take care of my sister and her baby, when I looked at her, I could see there was no life for her. 4

Before she died she said to me "When the lord closes the door somewhere, he opens a window." which mean't I was the only one left to represent our family in te near future. Tears rolled down my cheeks, I cried uncomfortably. 5

Later on I heard my father was shot, he was killed. I knew he was difficult, he was hard to know; if he was understanding maybe my family could have lived. He made situations tough for my sister and very uncomfortable. Deep down my heart, I knew life was just a rollercoaster, sometimes you're strapped in but sometimes you're not. On the other hand my niece died.6

There I was lingering in the dark, no family and I was born to see pain that ate my family away. I had nobody to lean on, nobody to talk to, I was an orphan. All I knew was that nothing speaks our grief as well as to speak anything. Somebody can ask me why I hhad to say this painful story and my answer would be it's wrong to sorrow without ceasing.