Puzzle

I'm thinking about those warm July nights.
It was the two of us sitting under the lights.
The only other thing we needed was firewood.
Either way, being around you felt oh so good.1

If I could put together a puzzle about you and I.
It would contain what you simply can't deny.
Let it be known our love is about to increase.
As a matter of fact I've found the first piece.2

and the piece is you. Oh the piece is you.
and the piece is you. Oh the piece is you.3

Our puzzle isn't like the rest.
For the both of us, it is best.
Because when this puzzle is complete,
No doubt you'll consider it so sweet.4

If I could put together a puzzle about you and I.
It would contain what you simply can't deny.
Let it be known our love is about to increase.
As a matter of fact I've found the first piece.5

and the piece is you. Oh the piece is you.
and the piece is you. Oh the piece is you.6

The second piece is yours to find.
Just close your eyes and open your mind.
The summer nights are coming to and end.
God knows I'm praying for our hearts to blend.
After the nights we shared in the middle of July.
I'm prepared to put together the puzzle of you and I.

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Comments

  • I Write naked gold member
    September 20
    Edit | Reply
    this is pretty good. There are a few places you should vary your word use a little as mentioned in a previous comment.


    • Marvin
      September 20
      Edit | Reply

      Thanks everyone.

      I would like to throw out there that this one of my poems that I have turned into a song. The usage of the word oh looks distracting but if you could hear the way I use it in the song I think you'd really like it.


  • StreetRider
    September 18

    Edit | Reply
    This really really good, and sweet. But the constant use of the word "oh" really messes up the vibe. Well unless this is song, which would make more sense. Maybe its just me. But overall i liked this poem. So keep writing!


  • EternalSouls
    September 17

    Edit | Reply

    Very Very Well Written!

    This is a very well written piece of poetry. The feeling is there, the talent is there. The rhyme through it all was consistent and it flowed so well. Again this was very well written.

    beginning: 5, ending: 5.