Chapter 35 Freedom

Freedom.1

Freedom.2

Freedom from you seems easy to reach,3

As I free my soul and begin to teach.4

Teach of my pain, deep down in my soul,5

And learning to live, maybe one day be whole.6

Angel.7

The softest whisper came from above.8

An Angel so pure, warming me with love.9

Embracing me close, lifting my soul.10

Sharing my pain, making me whole.11

She held me so strong as my tears fell down.12

Giving me a smile and melting my frown.13

She made me see I did not have to be,14

So alone in torture, I could be free.15

She stayed so close through every day,16

Listening and caring in every way.17

And as I started to understand my pain,18

I realised I was not to blame.19

I opened my eyes to truly see,20

What it was that was hurting me.21

I know now, that the secrets I concealed,22

Kept me in chains, I could never be healed.23

But as my words began to flow,24

Something inside me started to grow.25

A smile, a happiness I never really knew,26

Until my Angel truly got through.27

She changed my life, made me see,28

There was more to my life than pain and misery.29

Now no longer need to hide away,30

For every pain I have, she will always stay.31

Faith.32

Alone I sit? Not anymore,33

A pure white light, then an Angel I saw.34

She spread her wings and took me in,35

For she saw I was pure and carried no evil sin.36

She washed away his touch from within my soul.37

She listened to my words, she made me feel whole.38

She held me tight as I woke in the night,39

Plagued with nightmares, filled with fright.40

She held me close as tears I cried.41

She told me to hold on as I nearly died.42

She whispered secrets of truth in my eyes.43

She made me see I did not have to wear a disguise.44

She took the darkness so shadowed with pain.45

She made me see I was not going insane.46

She showed me a path where I could be free.47

She had faith to believe that I could be me.48

Beautiful Souls.49

There are so many beautiful souls out there today.50

They smile and inspire, have positive things to say.51

These are the people who make me see,52

That this world can really be a nice place to be.53

They listen to every word you say.54

They show you the path when you have gone astray.55

They wrap their arms around you when you need a hug.56

They congratulate and praise you, when you do good.57

These are the people that should always stay,58

For they will be there when the rest have gone away.59

Hold on to their words, listen to what they say,60

And see as you get stronger, day after day.61

Angels Hands.62

God left me standing with fear gripping my soul,63

For the devil took me from Gods hand and my body he stole,64

Leaving me fallen and so empty inside,65

Never again trusting that in Gods hands I could hide.66

It remained the same for years, me hating Gods name,67

For all it brought was suffering, anger and shame.68

For I was only a child, I could never understand,69

How God let me go into the devils hand.70

But not so long ago, an Angel came my way,71

Telling me I needed to speak the secrets so locked away.72

I knew it was true, for I was dying inside,73

And the pain and anger I carried, I could no longer hide.74

So whenever life got too much for me an Angel would appear,75

Listening to my words and calming all my fear.76

Holding me when I screamed a pain that ached me from within,77

And giving me hope and faith that I could get over the devils sin.78

Saving Grace.79

I found my saving grace in a song,80

On the day that I thought I could not carry on.81

For I had been to my doctor and told him of my pain.82

Then I downed two bottles of wine and screamed out my abusers name.83

I was on the edge of losing this time,84

For the shame of my words telling of his crime,85

Made me fall heavy, screaming in pain.86

And I knew in that moment I was to deep inside my pain.87

Yet for some reason I wanted to play a song.88

A tiny bit of hope to help me carry on.89

So I reached for a c.d, anything to hand,90

But as I played the words, I did not understand.91

It was a song about an Angel always being there.92

Carrying the burdens us humans have to bare.93

Showing of their love within an open soul,94

And showing that with hope and faith, you can be whole.95

I was in shock as I listened hard.96

For it was like someone had broken my guard,97

And shown me a hope at the most precious time,98

When I almost lost the fight against his crime.99

Amazing Friend.100

A friend entered my life at the most precious time,101

When I was beginning to speak about his crime.102

And she let me talk, she held me tight.103

She taught me how to be strong enough to fight.104

She understood about my pain,105

And she helped me talk through why I felt shame.106

She did not tell me I was going mad,107

She just listened and made me believe that it was him that was bad.108

She helped me express my anger and my voice.109

She made me believe that my life was my choice.110

She filled me with confidence and gave me a friendship unreal.111

She really helped me believe I had the strength to heal.112

Special Friend.113

I was at my lowest when a special friend came my way.114

A friendship and a soulship she offered that I knew would always stay.115

This friend goes by the name of Laura,116

And I know I would not be alive if not for her.117

For she entered my life and she gave me hope.118

She taught that there were always ways to cope,119

With whatever life threw your way,120

For you can survive if you take it day by day.121

She taught me how to fight, how to be strong.122

She taught me that through anything, you can always carry on.123

For whatever pain or sadness taints your way,124

There is always hope to get you through another day.125

She showed me a way that I could be free,126

By releasing the secrets that were locked deep inside of me.127

And she helped me find a voice that I could speak,128

So the secrets deep inside I no longer had to keep.129

For Laura.130