Donning the Cloak

Sasori of the Red Sands didn’t mind donning the cloak of the Akatsuki. To many, the red clouds symbolized responsibility, sacrifice, and organization. It meant giving up the freedom associated with being a rouge shinobi, and sacrificing personal wants to satiate the group’s agenda. And, all things considered, perhaps those assumptions were correct.1

But for Sasori, draping his shoulders with the symbol of an organization gave him much more freedom than anything else had before, when he had been a rouge shinobi—or even when he had been a shinobi belonging to Suna. There was a completeness felt within his wooden exterior; a sense not of sacrificed self-worth, but of enhanced self-worth. When those red clouds adorned his body, he was not Sasori of Akatsuki, but Sasori of the Red Sands, and the world recognized his strength.2

As far as Sasori was concerned, there were three major benefits of working in the Akatsuki. The first benefit Sasori recognized was the lack of organization within the Organization. Sure, there were a few major goals that all members worked to achieve, and the occasional odd-jobs for Leader-sama—but besides those, members worked within their pairs to achieve their own agendas. Rare was it that a pair of partners met another pair—whether on the battlefield or just in passing. And it was nearly unheard of for all ten Akatsuki to congregate under the same roof. It just wasn’t done. And that’s why Sasori liked it. All the benefits of the cloak, with bare minimal responsibility in return.3

The second benefit, which Sasori liked nearly as much as the first, was the cloak itself, and what it represented to ordinary villagers and lesser shinobi. Half of the time, a full blown-out battle with any adversary wasn’t necessary—his opponent would take one look at his garb, associate him with the villainous group of S-ranked criminals, and flee the field (if, in fact, Sasori allowed him to flee). Just that one cloak; a nearly three-dimensional black offset by vibrant, red clouds and accentuated with white lining ... it gave Sasori so much power, and he loved it. One look and men are sent running. Just a twitch of a finger and doors all around him slam shut, bolted firmly. Just his mere presence, in that cloak, changes the entire atmosphere of the whole town. 4

And the third benefit, the one Sasori liked the most, was that he—Sasori of the Red Sands—was the only exception to the Akatsuki “buddy-system.” He was the only one bearing a red-clouded cloak to work as a solo act, with no ties to any partner. While others had to sacrifice their daily routines for their partners, and learn to compromise when it came to habitual and domestic duties, Sasori could do what he wanted, where he wanted, when he wanted to do it (unless on a mission specified by their leader, Pein.) He was the freest Akatsuki of them all, and it was perhaps because of this reason that Sasori felt so free as a member of the organization.5

So, all this being said, Sasori was currently understandably upset.6

Very upset.7

First of all, he was currently working not for his own agenda, and not for the Akatsuki’s goals … but for Pein’s, their leader’s personal preferences.8

Second of all, he wasn’t wearing his cloak, so people paid him no more mind than to brush past him thoughtlessly, too caught-up in the rush of everyday life to notice a small, child-sized red-head in common clothes getting pushed aside as if unimportant. Sasori didn’t like it.9

And third—the biggest factor of Sasori’s unhappiness—was the nature of his job.10

His hard, cherry-wood eyes narrowed at the sight that lay beyond the dirty, smeared window of some insignificant bar in some insignificant tourist town, during some insignificant little festival.11

Soundlessly, Sasori pulled out a profile, and unfolded it carefully, making a show of smoothing out the wrinkles, upturning the corners, and other picky little details so he could delay the reading the summary. A pointless performance, for Sasori knew well and with acute detail what lay on that piece of paper. It did not take a trivial little document to surmise that the person he was watching with hawk-eyes, the person on the other side of that dirty little window, was to be his new partner. 12

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He had only agreed to one round. One little shot of sake, to celebrate his recent promotion to S-rank missing Nin.14

So why did they keep coming?!15

Deidara rested his head heavily in his hand, glaring unfocusedly at the stack of empty sake cups in front of him. A better question was, why did he keep drinking them?16

He was vaguely aware of someone sitting on his immediate right, whispering to him seductively as another sake cup mysteriously appeared in front of the dizzy Iwa Nin. Deidara blinked at it. Where did they keep coming from?17

A hand was splayed across his lower back, and the voice-in-his-ear whispered, “Come on; drink up!”18

Or something like that. Deidara’s ear wasn’t paying attention, much. Fair eyebrows sloped downwards and pales lips puckered in a kind of pout as Deidara shifted uncomfortably, the unfamiliar weight pressing into his back urging him to do things he really didn’t want to do. Dammit, it was probably some stupid young Jounin, thinking he was a woman again!!19

“Don’t … d-don’t … touch,” Deidara muttered drunkenly, trying to dispel the man’s hand away from his body while simultaneously brushing the additional glass of sake aside. “I … I’m … a man …”20

To the blonde missing-ninja’s chagrin, not only did the hand not go away, it moved higher, settling around his shoulders. He felt himself slide in his seat a little, pulled by the foreign hand, until he was pressed firmly into a warm, muscular chest. No doubt the chest of the voice-in-his-ear.21

Speaking of which, the voice began again, whispering something huskily in his ear that Deidara didn’t pay any attention to. Instead, he brought two gloved hands up to push against the man’s pectorals, valiantly (though needless-to-say unsuccessfully) trying to free himself from the grip.22

The man brought Deidara closer to him, and pressed the neglected sake glass into Deidara’s hands. Through the ringing of his ears, the missing Nin heard, “Drink!”23

To any girl, such a forceful command as “Drink!” would be an automatic red-flag warning that something sinister was lurking beneath the pleasant, though fiery, ripples of alcohol. However unfortunately, Deidara was no such girl, and any warning signs there might have been flew straight over his head. Thinking it might rid himself of voice-in-his-ear, Deidara resolved to take just one more shot, and then wash his hands of the establishment and the infuriating voice with its manly chest.24

Tipping his head backwards, Deidara poured the sake down his throat, wincing as it burned all the way down to his stomach. He slammed the empty glass down, where it joined all the others littering the table, and hiccupped delicately. 25

The effects of the ketamine, which the man had so rudely dissolved in Deidara’s sake, were nearly instantaneous. Deidara’s limbs suddenly became very sluggish, and his thoughts wandered aimlessly. A dream-like consciousness settled over his mind and body, and he lost himself to it. People were moving blurs; shooting stars almost—Deidara giggled as the sensation of being airborne took over. He was moving! He attempted to hold out his arms, for balance, but his arms were too heavy and sagged towards the ground.26

The next thing Deidara was aware of was the disappearance of the stars. He looked around, suddenly confused. It was quiet. Where had all the loud noises gone to? A sudden thump shook him out of his tendril of thought. He realized it had been him. He had gone ‘thump.’ But, Deidara didn’t mind. The place where he had thumped to was moist and cool, and felt good on his flushed body. He giggled again, stretching out his arms and legs, brushing the skin of his limbs against the wet, cool surface. It must be feathers, Deidara sluggishly mused, staring up into a black abyss, dotted with little lights. Oh, were those the stars that Deidara had been flying through, not too long ago? They were so far away now … he must have fallen. He and the bird that had flown with him through the hot little balls must have fallen.27

A voice, cooing at him from the night sky. It seemed so faint … was it a star, teasing him, telling him to go back and fly among them again? Deidara smiled, trying to speak, trying to say that he would love to …28

And then a heaviness settled upon his body. Something had fallen on him … Deidara struggled, trying to heave it off of him. But his arms were not coordinated; they ended up flopping uselessly around.29

Oh, and then the slug—the slug that crawled up his face and into his mouth, leaving a trail of warm slime in it’s wake. It traveled along the roof of his mouth, and then settled on his tongue, wrapping around it in a choking embrace. Deidara grunted in disgust, and tried to spit it out. But it was stronger than it appeared, and evaded being dispelled. And now, as if he didn’t have enough problems with the invasion of the slug in his mouth, the heaviness on top of him grabbed his midriff shirt and tried to tear it off his thin body. Deidara struggled to yell at the heaviness, to tell it to steal somebody else’s clothes—but that damn slug was still in his way!30

He suddenly didn’t want to be lying down anymore. He suddenly wanted to get away, to get as far away as possible from this slug robbing him of speech and this heaviness robbing him of clothing. He suddenly wanted another sake …31

But first things first: this heaviness had to go. He grinned, doing his best to put his hands together despite their lack of coordination, to make hand signs. Little did the heaviness know … he had slugs of his own …32

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Sasori had every intention to do the unthinkable and complain to Leader-sama and flat out refuse this blonde twit as a new partner. The ex-Suna nin watched from afar as the blonde’s companion secretly dumped what was no doubt a date-rape drug into a sake cup, letting it dissolve fully before forcing it on the already past-gone Iwa nin, who made a drunken attempt to refuse it before relenting and downing the whole thing in one gulp. 34

Sasori’s eyes narrowed at the blonde. Pathetic. An S-class missing Ninja falling for a trap usually only clever enough to trick teenage girls? What a fool, allowing himself to be so vulnerable in public … Sasori had half a mind to walk away now, and let whatever the blonde’s shady companion had in store for him to occur. But the other half of Sasori’s mind overrode the first, and he stayed put to observe, or step in if need be. If he was stuck with the blonde for a partner, Sasori would rather he remain un-traumatized.35

By that time, the effects of the drug had fully kicked in, and the fair-haired missing nin collapsed against the shoulder of his aggressor. The man, grinning at his catch, (Sasori noted the hunger in his eyes with disgust, and fought urges to kill the man right then and there) quickly stood up and threw the blonde over his shoulder roughly, lacking the gentle touch of before. He downed his own glass of sake, and then shouldered his way through the crowd and out the door, Deidara swinging limply in rhythm with his abductor’s steps.36

The man walked in the direction of a wooded knoll on the outskirts of town, Sasori following a safe distance behind him. No doubt the man felt the little hill to be deserted enough to do whatever dastardly deed he felt like to his barely-conscious victim.37

Once in the discretion of thick, curling trees, the man dropped Deidara on the ground. Sasori’s lip curled in disdain as the young Iwa missing-Nin giggled, stretching himself suggestively out on the grass. Idiot! Could he not sense what was about to take place?38

The aggressor cracked his knuckles, and then languidly draped himself on top of Deidara, fiddling with blonde locks before delving into his neck, trailing a wet tongue up the throat, over the chin, and into the drugged man’s mouth. Sasori heard Deidara struggle.39

The ex-Suna nin sighed in aggravation. It looks like he had to step in, after all … he pulled a summoning scroll from his sleeve, ready to summon a puppet to aid his pathetic soon-to-be-partner.40

A motion caught Sasori’s eye. Surprised, he watched the blonde missing-nin join his hands above his head, (with some difficulty) forming sloppy hand signs. A grin peeked around the invading man’s tongue, and suddenly several miniature explosions occurred in key places along the man’s spinal cord. Letting out a scream, the man rolled away, off Deidara, and down the hill, hitting trees and smacking into rocks on the way. Sasori, still surprised, calmly stepped over the man as he rolled past him, already dead. Narrowed cherrywood eyes continued to watch the drugged blonde, who was attempting to rise.41

Hmm … maybe not so pathetic, after all.42

The young blonde Iwa-nin suddenly tumbled down the opposite side of the hill. Sasori closed his eyes.43

Still an idiot, though.44

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Deidara laughed, trying to pull himself up so he could fly again. Grabbing fistfuls of feathers, he yelled, “ART IS A B ... b-bang, unn!” and dissolved into more fits of laughter. But then he was annoyed. Why wasn’t the bird moving? He wanted to fly with the stars again.46

He yanked hard on the cool feathers, urging their owner to spread its wings for him. To his confusion, the feathers simply ripped off, and the bird remained motionless.47

Then he was angry. “F-fine, stupid … stupid …” he currently didn’t have enough focus to finish his sentence, so he left it hanging. He turned around, and rolled off the bird.48

It ended up being a longer way down than the flaxen-haired ninja had previously anticipated. He rolled, and rolled, and rolled, occasionally hitting a bump that would shake his whole body, inside and out. Letting out a noise halfway between terror and enjoyment, Deidara curled himself into a ball and waited until he would stop rolling. When the ground indeed leveled out, his body came to a gentle stop.49

Yep, he was definitely off the bird. The ground was different here—softer but wetter; encompassing his body like a soft bed. Deidara smiled, closing his eyes. Time to go to sleep!50

Time faded out of existence. The Iwa nin was in a state of suspended animation, neither awake nor asleep. His limbs were numb, and he could no longer feel the ground beneath him. He simply lay there, floating in his dreamscape, unmoving, unthinking. When he again became aware of time, he wondered idly how much of it had passed.51

“You have to be the biggest fool I’ve ever seen,” an emotionless voice floated over from his left. “A grown man, falling prey to a date rapist. Pathetic.”52

Deidara rolled over, grunting quietly as his head spun. “Unnn … what?” His head swiveled, so his only eye could peer about blurrily. “W-who’s there? Slug-man, un?” 53

Sasori, sitting Indian-style next to the prone blonde, scoffed at him. “Sit up, Deidara of Iwagakure. You are a shameful sight to any Ninja.”54

Deidara, though less drugged, was still plastered. He didn’t pay attention to a single word the voice said, all attempts to make out the figure beside him abandoned—he decided he didn’t care anymore. He just wanted more sake. So, he got shakily to his feet (he was successful after about three tries) and started to stumble away, talking over his shoulder.55

“You’re not slug-man. But I don’t care who you are. I don’t want you,” Deidara slurred, and then stuck out his tongue in Sasori’s direction. “I want more sake,” he concluded. He turned fully away then, focusing on getting back to the bar.56

Sasori rose as well, with a sigh. It seems this would be more difficult than he had originally intended. Oh well.57

Fingers twitching, invisible chakra strings latched onto the blonde’s key joints from behind and Sasori moved the blonde to sit next to him again. Deidara, very confused as to why he was suddenly sitting down again, tried to get up a second time. Unblinkingly, Sasori pulled out several kunai knives and pinned the drunken blonde to the ground by his trousers.58

“U-un?!”59

As much as he didn’t like repeating himself, Sasori made an exception for his new partner. “Sit up, Deidara of Iwagakure. There are more pressing matters in need of your attention than simply getting smashed in a local bar,” he said colorlessly.60

Again, to Deidara the words coming out of the Suna Nin’s mouth were unintelligible. The only thing he registered was that the said Nin was keeping him here, when he really wanted to be over there.61

“You’re persistent, un … just like slug-man. Are you slug-man? Because if you are I have to show you my slugs again …” He put his hands together again.62

Sasori’s eyes widened, recognizing the hand signs from earlier. Quick as lightning, his chakra strings were attached to Deidara’s wrist and finger joints, and he wrenched the man’s hands apart.63

“Get your wits about you, you vagrant! I am not your previous attacker!”64

Suddenly unable to move his hands, Deidara gave that half-pout again and replied, “I don’t care if you’re slug-man or not! Leggo, un!! I don’t want you!!”65

Sasori was really starting to hate this man. “Likewise, I assure you,” he ground out through grit teeth, struggling with Deidara’s tendons over control of the blonde Iwa Nin’s hands. 66

Deidara, out of energy, gave up fighting the man. Instead, he leaned closer, peering closely out of one foggy blue eye. “Who … who are you, un? You’re really persistent. I’m a man, you know,” he commented off-handedly. His gaze turned away from Sasori then, and zeroed in on his hands. He watched his palmouths’ tongues flop around with sudden fascination, and Sasori had to clear his throat to win the drunken man’s attentions back.67

“I am Sasori of the Red Sands, here on behalf of my employer to extend an offer to you to join our organization,” Sasori explained tonelessly, cutting right to the chase. Deidara simply stared at the red head, for once silent. Sasori blinked.68

“Did you hear me?”69

Deidara blinked as well, and then leaned back, grinning. “Sa-so-ree … Sasoree Redsands, yeah? Haha, that’s a silly little name. Sa-so-ree … Sa-so-ree …”70

Sasori growled. How infuriating could one individual be?71

Then the blonde missing-Nin registered the other half of Sasori’s succinct speech. “Organi … zation? Employer?” Deidara’s lone eye clouded over in confusion. “What, un?”72

Sasori closed his eyes in impatience. “Yes, Deidara of Iwagakure. My employer wishes for you to join our Organization, the Akatsuki. You have heard of us, no doubt?”73

Deidara, somewhat sobered by the mention of the infamous gaggle of S-class missing Ninja, made a show of mulling over Sasori’s request, while secretly and more seriously studying his powerful companion. Possible places of weapon concealment? Possible accomplices, lurking nearby and listening to the conversation? Escape routes, should they be necessary? 74

His hands, free of their chakra possession, worked the kunai out of the ground, freeing himself. Though still dizzy, and though his movements were still drunkenly sluggish, Deidara’s mind comprehended the importance of remaining vigilant in Sasori’s company. This wasn’t any slug-man, after all.75

Wrenching the last kunai out of the ground, and so freeing himself, Deidara grinned up at the red-haired boy. “Akatsuki, yeah? Wow, what an honor! But, where are the red clouds, un? That’s right, isn’t it, what you wear? Red clouds, un?”76

Sasori noted with slight relief that the man had at the very least begun to pay attention. “Too conspicuous for current intent and purpose. But, yes, the cloak of the Akatsuki bears the red cloud of sunset before a storm. The only question that remains, Deidara of Iwagakure, is if you accept my employer’s invitation,” Sasori posed thoughtfully, watching as Deidara got to his feet with considerable more ease than previously. Good. He had begun to sober up.77

Deidara, lone blue eye scanning the riverbed and surrounding area, wandered slightly away from the Akatsuki member sitting nearby, waiting for his response. The recently-turned S-class missing Nin turned his back on him, so that the redhead could not see (to Deidara’s knowledge) what his hands were doing.78

“Join Akatsuki, really? Forgive my suspicion, Sa-so-ree Redsands … but I have only just been promoted to S-rank missing Nin, unn … it wouldn’t seem to me that I qualify for induction, un,”79

Sasori flinched at the name the drunken man had taken to calling him. His cherrywood eyes narrowed.80

“Believe me, Dei-dar-ra … if it were up to me, we would have never crossed paths. The cloak of the organization belongs no better on a Konohakagure genin than it does on you, as far as I am concerned. Fortunately for you, my opinion is outweighed by Leader-sama’s, and he has your qualifications in high esteem. It seems he sees something in you that I clearly don’t. But, enough chatter. What is your answer?”81

Deidara grinned, unseen by Sasori. His hands dropped to his sides, finished with their task. He had just under a minute before everything was ready. Lessening his grin to a haughty smirk, Deidara faced his adversary.82

“Hmm … well, Sa-so-ree Redsands … it all depends on the correct answer, un. Do you know the correct answer?”83

Sasori stood. This arrogant little child was beginning to try his patience. “Patronize me again, little brat, and I will forget Leader-sama’s opinion,” he spoke dangerously, fingers unconsciously twitching. “So, at this moment, the answer that would most benefit the keeping of your life would be yes.”84

Four … three … two … one …85

Deidara let his smirk grow. “I’m sorry, Sasoree-no-danna … but the correct answer is … BANG!” 86

Sasori’s eyes widened and he let out a curse, jumping away. But it was too late; the ground exploded beneath the puppet-master’s feet, sending him flying. Deidara put his hands together again, making more hand signs, and the little clay bird he had been working on previously expanded to monumental size. Jumping on its back, they became airborne.87

Meanwhile, Sasori had twisted in mid-air, so that the tree he would have slammed headfirst into became a landing pad instead. Attaching himself horizontally to the trunk of the tree with chakra, Sasori watched as the blonde summoned a colossal bird, and jumped on it’s back. The bird immediately took to the skies, and Deidara turned briefly back to Sasori before distance separated them.88

“Really, Sa-so-ree, it’s nothing personal, un. I’m all for belonging to wayward group of miscreants,” he called out cheerfully, nearly loosing his balance on his hovering clay craft. “But, you see, I work alone—so it never would have worked out between us, unn!! Well, that, and I really want more sake. Nice meeting you!! Send my regards to slug-man, yeah? Bye now!”89

Sasori’s blood boiled as he watched the tipsy man fly off, clinging to the back of his bird like a seahorse to kelp. Sasori blatantly wished for the man to fall off.90

The redheaded ex-Suna Nin jumped down from the tree, not sparing a second glance to the skies and his fleeing partner. Because, regardless of the blonde’s decision to decline the proposal, it didn’t matter. Pein Leader-sama requested that Sasori bring back this blonde Iwa Nin as his new partner …91

And bring him back he would.92

Sighing, Sasori pulled out a familiar black cloak, unfolding it with tender care, and draped it over his shoulders.93

No, Sasori of the Red Sands didn’t mind donning the cloak of the Akatsuki. It was the rest of the world that he couldn’t stand. 94