Dear suckers... er... Storywrite friends and patrons:1
Through some rather recent and bizarre occurrences of late that I cannot explain because you will think, obviously erroneously, I made them up, I have recently learnt that I am, in fact, the Clown Prince of Latvaria. Yes! I know! It came as a shock to me as well! Imagine my feelings when I learnt that my true father, King Fritzlekatesch III, when upon his bed of death revealed me as his first born, albeit illegitimate, but thusly still bestowing clown privilege status unto me (as per Latvarian law, passed 1649). Upon his passing I immediately inherited his kingdom and personal fortune of one hundred million gazillion dollars.2
Unfortunately for me, and all my dear Storywrite friends and patrons, civil war broke out four minutes later. As such, royalty at this turbulent time is to be raped and shot and hacked to one hundred pieces on sight. Obviously I cannot venture into my newfound and deserved empire to collect my newfound personal fortune.3
So here is my offer and my plea, available only exlusively to my Storywrite friends and patrons and everyone else: 4
Send me all your personal and financial information, signing powers a must, blank cheques with my name upon them, debit cards with PIN codes attached, your credit card numbers and PIN codes if apply, plus anything else to do with your finances. Also, I need a quick infusion of cash to get the money out of the country as bribing the right officials doesn't come cheap. 5
For each and every Storywrite member the responds with said cash and information, I will reward you by depositing one gazillion dollars into your account.6
It's as easy as that. Help me out! I'm in dire straits and you're my only hope! My life is at risk and you are my only hope!7
Once the one hundred gazillion dollars has been moved we can all get back to normal. Naturally I... er... we'll all be richer for it!8
Thank you so much!9
Sincerely:10
DreamWanderer, Clown Prince of Latvaria11
Author notes
Yeah. Got another idiotic email. Couldn't help myself... :-D
Anything
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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What can I say. It was hilarious and very clever. I'm still laughing.
You are the master. I want my gazillion in tens, thank you.
Tricia ?????????
???????bank
???-??-???? SS
&)*$%^* pin number.
I expect it to be in my account right away.
Trish
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Done. Thanks for helping out a fellow in a tough spot! :-)
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haha nice
what a waste of time
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sorry to waste your time. I get this crap mailed to me almost daily. total waste of time
(
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Ehhh mon...
You muzz be wid dem bruhthers dahn in lil' ole suth ifricca!
Ahz areddy sent dem bruhthers alla me cash, mon! Still wayt'n t'hear back frum dem doh...
(nice try)
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Ahh. I know dem bros. You be hearing from dem soon. They showed me how to do dis proper... :-D
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XD haha I laughed my butt off while reading this.
do you take debit?
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Yup, I do. And I'm sending you your gazillion dollars for it :-D
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