“I wish I may I wish I…”1
Naw it’ll never come true.2
“Hey! stupid star! I been wishing every night for three months what's up?” 3
Pixie stood, her hands outstretched, chin thrust forward and eyes locked on that first star .4
“You get one more chance. Bring my Daddy home, tonight!”5
Her lip quivered slightly, “Please?”6
Author notes
55 words inspired by a friend...
Oh yeah I drew that...
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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Good Job!
Oh! That is very cute! I really liked this poem and the 55 words idea. I don't think I'll even try writing a story of 55 words because I can never fit all what I want to say in 55 words... Great job! -
There is great power in the heartfelt wishes of a child.
Very touching and beautifully written. Extremely appropriate to our times.
John -
Beautiful, Susan, I loved this
Susan,
Inspiring words of comfort here. To wish is to hope. To hope is to accept. To accept is to achievement. From achievement comes wishdom. Wisdom brings knowlege. Knowledge accepts gratitude. Gratitude brings friendship. From friendship comes warmth. From warmth comes love. Love, an everlasting treasure. If only to wish.
Oh yeah, beautiful picture -you are definitely on a roll.
~
Kalen
Edited on Oct 07, 2:31 p.m. because 'typo'. -
Nice hook at the end.....to lend a backstory for the reader to imagine. Clever.
The art lends an atmosphere to this -- although I do like the snail better.
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Lovely. Nothing like separation and tragedy to bring out the wishes. A very hopeful story. This makes me want to go wish on a star. I used to do that a lot. They don't seem to fall here why is that? Maybe they're just cloaked
I love your artwork! Perfect for this story 
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This is so simple on the surface, but there is an undercurrent of loss and hope that make it poignant. Well done Susan, and the artwork is good too.
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Oh Susan...this is wonderful!! I love the art work as well. You could write and draw several of these 55 word treasures and publish them...children would love them.....both big and little.
Sam
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Well lets hope her dad does come home...the war I assume. Does wishing on stars work? Maybe that has been my mistake all these years. Which one is the Moxie star? I'm fresh out.
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When I was a kid, I used to make a wish a day to the stars and to the moon (the more the better)
This story has that lovely innocence typical of children.
I wish that your wishes and your friends come to reality.
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