A Moonlit Night

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The silvery glow peeking through the canopy above was just bright enough to trace the outline of a young girl sitting below a tree. She was huddled on the ground, hugging her legs to her chest, and resting her head against her smooth, bare knees. You could see her small, frail body shaking with silent sobs as she wrapped her shawl around herslf tighter. The only shound you could hear were the occaisional scurrying of feet and snapping of twigs as a small forest animal moved from one place to another. 11

“I didn’t mean to run away,” the girl whispered. “I just didn't understand. I love you mom; I love you dad. I want you back.” But Elsa knew this would never happen, for she was lost in the forest, where no one would ever find her again. 22

She imagined she could hear the voice of her loving mother, calling her name when breakfast was ready, or telling her for the third time to go to bed. Elsa made a silent wish that some miracle would happen, and someone would find her, or she would find her way out, but she knew these were childish wishes. She's already tried to find her way out, with no success, and had screamed herself hoarse for help. She knew now that it was too late, it was too dark for her to find her way out, and most-likely too dark for anyone to see her who was just passing by. And, after all, who would be passing by at this time of night? Besides, Elsa could feel her ankle throbbing in pain, and tried to ignore the warm trickle of liquid on her skin. She wasn't sure exactly what she'd tripped on, but she'd tried to scope around for a way out of the forest when it was getting dark, and now she regretted it. Elsa had tripped on something hard and sharp, which threw her to the ground and caused her to not only get a huge gash, but sprain her ankle as well. With the amount of blood she was losing, Elsa knew her time was almost up. 33

"I didn't mean it. I don't hate you." Elsa whispered aloud. 44

She hoped somehow, by some chance, her parents would be able to hear her, and understand her love for them. She felt a warm feeling behind her eyes and felt the tears come once more as she remembered the last words she'd said to her mom, I hate you. She regretted those words almost more than how much she regretted running away. Elsa thought she'd just run away for the day, and then return, now calm, and apologize. But no. She was now sure to die. Elsa suddenly got an idea, and found a sharp rock and carved the words. 'I love you mom and dad, and I didn't mean what I said. I hope you understand,' on the trunk of a tree. Elsa hoped that, by some miracle, her parents, or someone would find her body, and see the message she left on the tree. 55

“Goodbye,” Elsa whispered, as she started to grow faint, and took her last breath. 66

And there, she fell silent, never to move again.7

Author notes

My favorite waffle topping is strawberries and whipped cream, and my favorite book is Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows.

Also, just so you know, this story isn't a new write. My computer, for some reason, won't let me submit any prewrites, so I had to copy and paste to enter this contest

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Comments

1 - 5 of 5

  • Luci Ferraris
    October 18

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    Why do good stories always have a bad ending? I don't mean the end of your story was bad...it was great.
    I enjoyed reading it, you made it very detailed with the right atmosphere.

    beginning: 4, language: 4, plot: 4, ending: 4, dialog: 4, characters: 4.


  • MJ Luver
    September 23
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    Thanks!!


  • Raining.Fire
    September 6

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    amazing story! The only mistake I found was in the 1st paragraph you wrote "shound" instead of "sound". But that is the only one I noticed. I love all of your descriptions, and I really feel like I am in the forest watching Elsa drift away. I really liked the end and how how she carves the message in the tree. GReat job!!!!!!!

    ~Meagan


  • DecoDog
    September 2

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    hey there the title of this story is very similar to one i read yesterday. good job though i really like it and it was interesting enough for me to be glued to the scrren from start to finish


    • ELFgirl12 silver member
      September 4
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      well...it probably is the same one. I had to rewrite it to enter it in this contest because my computer wont let me submit prewrites for some reason

1 - 5 of 5