New Monster

"We found and old doll, out in the grass,1

She has special powers, we set a black mass,2

We sat in a circle, all holding hands,3

The doll-bed held together with old rubber bands..."4

-Rasputina5

~6

Emma laid the ratty dolls in a line on her bed, like patched up marchers waiting for their death parade. She grinned an insidious grin that creeped through her dirty blonde hair and was complemented by her brown eyes. She laid there next to them, thinking of the endless possible ways to "kill" the dolls by dismantling them; razor blades, knives, broken glass, her own little pale fingers. She felt the anticipation build until she could bear it no longer. She stood up and brushed the dirt off her old hand-me-down skirt made of Jean fabric and her brown long sleeve shirt that only matched her skirt in its shoddiness. She walked across her wooden bedroom floor, as it creaked cryptically. She opened the door and walked out of her attic-like room and down the spiral staircase which creaked as well, as it was made of wood too. 7

"Mother...", said Emma. "Yes," Her mother replied, sitting on the puke green couch with a near empty bottle of vodka sitting next to her and a novel in her two hands. Emma noticed how she always seemed to have a vodka bottle next to her ever since Daddy left. "May I go out to the outhouse? There are some school supplies I may need tomorrow", "Like what kinds of school supplies might you need?" Emma's mother replied trying her best not to slur a syllable. Like daggers to murder all my fellow students and teachers with Emma thought, but of course thought not of saying. "Like..." Emma stopped and knew she had taken too long to appear honest. "Perhaps I should have taken us to church this morning so you could've been taught about how the lord frowns upon lies and the little girls who make them", her mother said saucily. Perhaps I should have thrown out the liquor so you wouldn't have had such a nasty hangover in the morning and then we would have been able to go to church, Emma thought, but once again deemed her thoughts a definite taboo. She just lowered her head a bit and feigned feeling disgraced.8

She walked upstairs looking as shameful as possible. When she got to her room she thought of any sharp utensils she had in her room since she had hidden most of them in the outhouse because of her mother's aversion to them. Then she replayed the scene in her living room with her mother. Her thoughts now revolved around a question that was forming in her mind. Why does mother care so much about me going into the outhouse? Emma pretty much assumed her mother must be keeping an embarrassing amount of liquor out there. It was part of her mother's preparation for when her little lady church friends came over with their big gossip topics and even bigger church hats. She decided she sneak out later that night, or morning in all literality. She didn't feel like doing an imitation of her new aptly practiced ritualistic hobby. 9

She looked at her little clock sitting on her wooden night stand beside her bed; the big hand pointed to the twelve and the little hand pointed to the two. She knew she would regret staying up this late while in school tomorrow, but ever since she could remember she could not sleep knowing there were dolls in the house. She used to get them on her birthdays and on Christmas, but her mother made sure to end that when she realized she had ruined every single one she got.10

Earlier that day her acquaintance, Mary, came over and let her borrow some of her dolls. Emma knew she shouldn't consider Mary any more than an acquaintance considering most girls her age usually came to despise her for ruining their dolls. And most girls who hadn't had their dolls ruined by Emma had friends who did. However, Mary was new and she only would've had to spend one day at school to realize being friends with Emma wasn't in the least bit trendy in which case she would most likely have stuck to ignoring her. However, Mary wasn't to be enrolled until tomorrow. Emma didn't care though, it would be too late for her dolls tomorrow. In fact, Emma thought of what she was about to do as revenge in a speedy fashion, so speedy it happened before she had anything to be vengeful about.11

Emma snuck out of her room and down the spiral stairs again, only this time the house was dark. There seemed to be a sense of fear in the air, a fear of getting caught. She snuck out the back door and walked across the yard filled with more dirt than grass. She opened the outhouse door and pulled a string and the light flickered on. She looked to her left to see a big shelf of liquor. Why does the feel the need to stock up? Then, Emma considered the fact that she should not be judging anyone's source of contentment. She walked to the back corner of the outhouse and found her little plastic bag. She picked it up and headed back for her room. 12

When she got up to her room she turned on the light and adjusted the dolls so they were all looking at her. There were five, five little ratty fiends staring her. She took one and slowly slit its fabric throat and watched the white fluff pop out. Then she went mad and started slitting random parts; the hand, the eyes, the leg, the thigh, and then on the next doll. After doing this five times she stared at the first doll she had ruined. She stared at the white fluff that was still popped out of her throat. It would look much prettier with red stained fluff. She first thought to go mix red food coloring with corn syrup, but then decided on a much easier and less riskier way of doing it. She picked up a razor blade and placed it up to her pallid finger tip. She pressed down and felt a shot of pain. "Bloody hell!" She said in what seemed to be a scream and a whisper. She then scolded herself for cursing. Mother always says "the lord frowns upon curse words and the little girls who use them".13

She looked at her finger, completely agitated by the pain, and realized barley a drop of blood had come out. She still longed for the blood-red fluff, but she had realized how much she despised pain. She was a victimizer not a victim.14

The next day Emma was standing by a stop sign waiting for her bus when Mary came up to her. "Hello", Mary said and Emma responded with the same. She nearly felt like vomiting due to her vast distaste for small talk and pleasantries. Emma also disliked Mary's pretty appearance. Today she was wearing a purple hat and her hair was dark brown and curly. She had on a white shirt, purple overalls matching her hat, and rain boots that Emma assumed were more for the outfit's complementation than protection against the rain that wasn't falling today.15

In school Emma's teacher told the class to draw pictures of whatever they like. So, of course Emma drew dolls. When Emma's teacher walked by she looked somewhat concerned while looking at the drawing. Emma looked up and could see contemplation on the teacher's face. Finally, the teacher knelt down to talk to Emma. "You seem to be liking dolls lately Em", she said. "You said we could draw pictures of whatever we like, and it's Emma not Em", she said rudely. The teacher sighed, stood up, and walk to the next desk. Emma wondered how concerned the teacher would be if she had drawn the dolls after she had had her fun with them. Emma didn't hate dolls nearly as much as she loved them when they were dead. She looked at her teacher, examined her face that so obviously attempted to comfort little ones. It was then that Emma compared dolls and humans for the first time. She hated humans, but she was sure the lord frowned upon the murder of humans and the little girls who did it. But she very much longed to do it. To slit the flesh of a real person and watch the crimson fluid flow out and see the look on their face as life slowly fleeted from their eyes. To not have to worry about hurting herself to see that beautiful liquid.16

Emma was thankful not to see Mary on the bus while going home. She didn't feel like listening to or answering any of her silly little questions about what all the little girls said about her. Emma wondered if the rumors had scared so much she would forget coming back for her dolls. Mary had only let Emma borrow some of her old ugly ones any ways, she had kept all the clean new ones for herself.17

When Emma walked into the house her mother was sitting on the couch with the same novel she had last night, she was only on an obviously different page and had a different half-empty bottle of liquor by her side. Emma was heading for the spiral staircase when her mother's powerful voice came out, "Emma?". "Yes, mother", Emma replied. "Why did you ruin the poor girl's dolls, and after she was so nice to you? If I had known she let you borrow them I would have made sure to put a stop to it, with your crazed addiction." "I didn't ruin them, Mother!", Emma said defensively, "They were already like that, Mary gave them to me because she knew I know how to sow. She wants me to fix them, Mother."18

Emma went up stairs knowing if her mother wasn't so relaxed on her liquor she would be punishing her, because she was a terrible liar. Although, she was pretty good at sewing, she would never in her life work towards the fixing of those little rags. 19

Emma was eating supper with her mother in the dining room when she heard a knock at the door. She automatically shifted into panic mode, because she knew if it was Mary then she would be causing a scene with Emma's mother about those silly little dolls. She could almost already see the hurt across Mary's sweet innocent-like face. 20

Emma's mother arose and made her way to the door. "Don't move until you've finished your meal, then you must rinse your plate", Emma's mother said before leaving the dining room. Emma arose not a second after her mother left making her way out of the dining room which led into the living room. She saw her mother talking to Mary at the door while she slipped into the backyard. She walked into the outhouse and found what she was looking for on the right wall resting on a huge rusty nail. It was a rope, and Mary grabbed it, and she then let every horror film clip she had ever seen with a noose in it flash across her mind as always when she looked at this rope. She tried to fit it in her pocket but it wouldn't fit, so she just crumbled it up as best she could and walked back in the house. 21

Mary and a girl from school were sitting on the love seat, that matched the couch. Mary had a very patient face, however, the other girl looked ready to snap at any one who glanced at her. Emma could hear the dramatic clanging of dishes in the kitchen and knew she had angered her mother by leaving the table. But her mother was too sophisticated to act angry when there were guests.22

"Your mom says I should get my dolls and leave as quickly as possible, and that you haven't behaved correctly", Mary said, "but she said she wasn't sure if you had finished with them yet, what did she mean by that?". Emma didn't have an actual response so she just mumbled, "follow me". Mary stood up but her friend did not follow.23

Emma was surprised to be able to make to her room without Mary asking about the rope in her hand. Emma walked in and let Mary walk in. Emma closed the door and locked it, she didn't believe it would stop Mary from running completely, but that it would delay her. Mary seemed to pay no attention to the door being shut and locked. Instead all of her concern went straight to the fact that her dolls lay nowhere in sight in Emma's bedroom. "Where have my dolls gone?", Mary asked with concern growing in her voice like a flower that Emma was soon to wilt. "Be patient", Emma said making her way to her closet door. She opened up the door and pulled a string as the light flickered on, just as the one in the outhouse. Mary stepped up next to Emma who was staring in the right upper corner of her little square closet. Mary's face shifted from Emma's demented looking stare to the pile of patches, fabric, and eyeballs in the corner of the closet.24

Emma looked at Mary's face and saw a tear welling up in her right eye. "What did you do?", Mary's voice had something in it that the word "shock" just couldn't justify. Mary was now staring at Emma and she shoved her into the frame of her closet door. The little bit of sympathy Emma had for Mary just vanished at that very moment as she felt her back bruise on the door frame. 25

Emma regained complete balance, stretched the rope out with her two hands, and wrapped it around Mary's neck. Mary tried to scream but barley even a sound came out of her. Her faced turned a bright red at first, but then a blotchy purple, and her eyes looked like they were bulging out of her little skull. Emma watch the consciousness fade from her face and then Emma realized how much she had pressed her body up against Mary's body because she felt Mary's body slowly relax.26

Emma laid Mary down on her bed in a horizontal fashion. She placed her face real close to Mary's, moved the rope out of the way, took the razor blade in her hand and shoved it into her throat. She watched the blood trickle out as she made other slits with another razor blade. It was then that Emma heard a knock at her door. She looked up really quick and panicked at first, but then remembered she had locked the door. Emma picked up Mary's body and drug to the closet and shoved it in the back.27

Emma grabbed the rope and went and unlocked and opened the door and saw Mary's rude looking friend. "Where's Mary", she asked with a hint nervousness and a hint of impatience. "She's gathering her dolls from the closet", Mary responded, "you might want to go help her." "Very well", the girl responded. 28

She walked to the opened closet door Emma had intentionally left open because she knew Mary's friend wouldn't think Mary would close the closet door to search for her dolls. Emma quickly shut but forgot to lock it  then ran up to Mary's friend. The closet light was off so Mary's friend could not yet see Mary's body. Emma didn't want to strangle her before seeing the look on her face. It was something Emma knew she would savor for the rest of her life. Emma pulled the string and quickly snapped her head back to see the girl's face. Her expression was blank at first, and then she just looked a little confused. It was definitely less than what Emma expected. Then Emma turned and realized it looked as if Mary was just napping in the back of her closet because her body was facing the wall and there were no injuries on her backside. Emma let out a almost inaudible laugh as Mary's friend turned Mary over and saw all the blood coming from Mary's wounds. She stepped out of the closet in shock. Emma could see her gathering air for a loud scream when Emma stretched the rope out and wrapped it around the girl's neck. She knocked the girl onto the bed and watched the consciousness flow out of her just like Mary. 29

Emma was having fun with the two corpses. She had dissevered all their body parts. She laid in a pile four arms, four legs, and two heads. And the best part of it all was the endless supply of beautiful crimson fluid she had at her disposal. Emma had the two heads in her hands when she heard she door knob turn. She then remembered in that split second that she had forgotten to lock the door. Facing the wall, soaked in blood like the rest of the room she turned her head to the door and watched as her mother walked in.30