Once upon a time, well actually last night, there was a big party. You know the ones where the friends of acquaintances of friends show up uninvited? Well, one of those big parties.1
Gen went with her boyfriend Alex, with whom she’d been with for 3 months now. As with all such parties, there was a lot of drinking… and who knows what else! Gen’s friend, Amy, wasn’t able to go. Hence she’s really curious this morning to find out about the party.2
Amy So… what happened last night?3
Gen (silent)4
Amy C’mon, you can tell me.5
Gen (mutters under her breath) I don’t need to tell you.6
Amy What did you say?7
Gen Nothing much… just “it was fun”.8
Amy Didn’t sound like it, c’mon…9
Gen NOTHING HAPPENED!10
Amy looks at her inquisitively. Finally, Gen looks away.11
Amy You know, if anything’s bothering you, you can always-12
Gen (quietly) I don’t remember.13
Amy (kindly) What don’t you remember?14
Gen What happened… well, not really.15
Amy smiles patiently at her friend while Gen looks imploringly at the floor.16
Gen Last thing I remember… Someone said the keg was empty so they’d get more. Alex? Alex was with me, but…17
She started sobbing silently. Amy put her arm around her and gave a sympathetic squeeze.18
Amy It’s OK, it’s gonna be just fine…19
Gen I don’t know, I don’t remember what happened. Who knows, I was SO drunk. (pause)20
Amy Gen…21
Gen I could’ve gotten seriously overdosed on drugs. I could’ve trashed the place. Hell, for all I know, I could be pregnant!22
Amy Gen! At least look on the bright side-23
Gen (sobbing) The bright side, the bright side!? It’s never happened to you, you can’t possibly know…24
Amy I know I can’t, I know…25
Gen But I’m so afraid to see him… What will he do when he sees me?26
Amy We’ll see… He’s coming now.27
Gen looks down as a worried Alex runs up to her.28
Alex You OK?29
Gen Mmm…30
Alex You were pretty bad last night, I was worried.31
Gen (looking up) Alex, what happened?32
Alex What do you mean? After you passed out, I got you a cab home. I needed to make sure you got home OK.33
Gen So… nothing happened.34
Alex I guess not… why?35
Gen It’s not important, don’t worry about it.36
Alex starts to walk away-37
Gen Alex!38
Alex Ya?39
Gen Thanks.40
Alex smiled back at her and, for the moment at least, they lived happily ever after.41
Author notes
This is my first attempt ever at dialogue, as a practice for something else I have to do. If you have any suggestions, PLEASE let me know!
As for the bonus part of the contest, I didn't consciously put in any of the 30 words, therefore if I did it was purely coincidence, yet obviously doesn't count.
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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*smiles*
I liked this because it was a really straightforward and simple storyline. Yet I felt worried about the character. I felt scared when Gen didn't know what had happened that night, I felt her worry, her nervousness at seeing her boyfriend. I was even starting to think badly of Alex. I felt her relief and her...gladness as she realized what a special person she had.
this was really nice.
Thanks.
good luck.
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I can tell you from experience, NEVER GET THAT DRUNK! Things will happen and pricks won't tell you what really happened. I don't hold liquor very well and I found that out the hard way. I woke up in a strange bed without a shirt and my underwear was missin'. Good times! *rolls eyes* This is very dramatic. The only thing I know to say would be, if she got that smashed, I don't think she'd be that upset or cheery or worried just yet, it takes at least 2 days for the worry to set in, but other than that this is pretty good. I enjoyed it. Keep up the good work.
-Miranda
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Edited on Oct 18, 7:51 p.m. because 'Because I'm retarded when it comes to verb tenses apparently...'. -
I like this. I especially like the plot. Well built with a great twist in the end. You did a good job.
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cute. very well written and entertaining. easy to relate to and I like how you tie it in to the happily ever after. sounds great. keep it up
ja ne
fea -
Good dialogue, it could be fleshed out a bit though. It has the makings of a fine scene. Good luck in the contest.
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WEEEEEEE
Whoa! Oh My God! I am so sorry! I commented on this one and I was thinking of another story! Sorry!
ANYWAY! This was actually really good! This write was fantastic. It really kept me entertained. Why would the person do drugs and think she might be pregnat... Well, I don't know but anyway it was really good I encourage you to keep up the good work my friend! GOOD JOB! 
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bleh
Hi person dude/girl i dont know who you are. Anyway, this was an okay write. Kind of bored halfway through, this story needs more.. I don't know. It was ok, I mean, it was GREAT, but not the type of stories I like to read. Other people will think it is awesome though. Good Job! Keep up the Good WOrk! Bye person!
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Interesting - dialogue - reads like a script ... a play. As a contest piece ... it is unique. Living happily ever after ... what a concept! hehehehehe
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Sort of like a drama script for a play. A different take on the topic of the contest. - all live happily ever after.
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