The Art Amidst The Sorrow

 1

 2

3


The acrylics of night etch before her eyes, like a stretched canvas dotted with white stars. 4

5

Her fingers play callously over the imaginary fabric, the star of creation alive within her.6


She dreams of tinted hues: the yellow of the sun, the green of the sparse trees, the brown of her mother’s eye. 7

8

As if entranced, she reaches out in tip-toes, trying to capture the stars.9

10

Her feet strain to keep her weight, planted firmly on the parched earth.11

12

Her mind forms a picture unseen.  13

14

And with her thumb, held out like a brush. 15

16

She joins: one dot with another. 17

18

19

20

21

22


23

Author notes

This is actually an idea I had been playing around with.

It is about a girl in an obviously poor and depraved region, who finds art within the night skies and uses the sky as her canvas to quench her creative thirst ...

vegan chihuahua

A contest entry

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    : Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have 0. (?) (Line numbers)
    Ratings:

Comments

1 - 13 of 13

  • BlackTide
    September 5

    Edit | Reply

    WOW

    I lvoed this! So creative and well thought-out, I see how you won the silver in the contest "In 100 Words!", nice job here! I love the meaning and the way you painted a picture (with onely 100 words)
    XxLexixX

    beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.


  • killerkb
    September 4

    Edit | Reply
    Well written. I really enjoyed the concept of connect the dots. Art can be found in the most unlikely places.


  • Glitflyer
    August 25

    Edit | Reply
    Awesome and well written.
    The imagination in this piece is good.

    I particulary like this line.
    "Her fingers play callously over the imaginary fabric, the star of creation alive within her."

    Great Job! Good Luck inmy contest.


    • Asfand
      August 25
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you so much! The feedback really means a lot and I'm glad you enjoyed this piece!

  • Wonderful, Asfand.

    I was looking very much forward to a great entry from you and you didn't dissapoint me.

    Thank you so much for entering my contest and good luck@


  • londonparisNYC
    August 19
    Edit | Reply
    so beautiful....


  • Intoxica
    August 13

    Edit | Reply

    Well, well, well...

    I think i have some serious competition in this little 100 word contest...
    That was really just...beautiful. I love art. You captured imagination really well.

  • That was very well written.

    I loved this line-

    Her fingers play callously over the imaginary fabric, the star of creation alive within her.

    I thought it captured a nice emotion and the description made it very vivid. Almost like you could see the girl.

    I don't know why but I imagined her as a thin, short girl with worn out jeans and shoes. But yet strinkingly brilliant green eyes with long straight black hair.

    Great job over all! (:


  • lavanya
    August 11

    Edit | Reply

    Beautiful wording Asfend,

    Here you really painted beautiful piecture of a little girl's craving for art with you silky soft words...you know sometimes your style of writing reminds me of 'Sufi shayer'deep and beauitufl....well done dear,keep writing and smiling too.

  • Cry

    The beauty of this made me cry. I have tears about to stream down my face! thanks for the beautiful entry and good luck!

    CreaterSk8er

    • Asfand
      August 11
      Edit | Reply
      I consider that a big compliment ... if my words had that effect than that's great! Thank you so much! I'm glad you like it!

  • rustic
    August 10

    Edit | Reply

    I feel stupid

    I only really got it after reading your author notes but the story was pretty


  • Farhan
    August 10

    Edit | Reply
    It was really awesome dude. Not the story you dunderhead fool, the painting. Yes i have seen it. Where??? don't ask me. I am saying you don't ask me. OK i will tell you. I saw it in the sky. Well i really saw the sky and imagined that i have seen the painting. And about story, ummmmmmmmmmmmm it was OK but not so impressive. could have done better. I mean what is there to read about a girl who is watching the sky and making a painting on her stupid canvas????? You could have gone into details that her painting was so beautiful that one could give anything to get a hand on this painting or the girl was sooooooooooo beauteous that one could spend whole of his life watching the girl no but you just finished the whole story in hurry. sooooooo bad
    JUST KIDDING :-)
    Nice story and if i am not mistaken, you have also written a poem similar to this

1 - 13 of 13