The Jointer Chronicles: The Pearl River Adventure (chapter 1)

It all started with a news program. Pretty retarded, actually. But then again, if you had this strange obsession with science fiction becoming reality, you'd have ended up tuning in to the program to watch as well. As soon as the reporter said his first word in that highly scientific lab, I knew. And my first thought was "Cool!"1

Well, actually, it was, "Oh my gods, the man is talking in a high squeaky monotone!" My second thought was, "Cool." But then he asked the first cloned human to step out of the machine. That was the moment. That was the second my life changed.2

"Oh HELL no!" I screamed at the television, leaping off the couch, the blanket slipping of my shoulders. What idiot in his right mind would clone the man on the television? I stared in horror at Adolf Hitler. Then my program flicked off. apparently, there was more pressing news.3

"There has been a... a revolution. Adolf Hitler is now in power. Heil Hitler." spoke a nervous news anchor, tears in her eyes.4

"Damn it!" I screamed at the television. That montser was back? Wasn't the first time bad enough? I continued my midnight triade as I stormed about my house. My parents were in Valdasta, Georgia, at the drag races. I couldn't just sit here! I had to do something!5

I started packing. Two words were bouncing around my brain. Kill Hitler. Kill Hitler. Kill Hitler. Clothes, a pair of shoes, some non-perishables. I dressed in some clothes that would make it very hard to see me in the night. I pulled a scarf off the hanger I kept them on. The soft red fabric imprinted with skulls hid my pale white facial features.I didn't have to worry about my hair or eyes, those features were pretty generic. Both a dark brown that would easily blend into the night. I shrugged on a black leather jacket and scribbled out a note to my parents. The newscaster was stating how many of the governors in the states were being replaced by men chosed by Hitler.6

Logic said I should be able to get to Montgomery quickly if I started out now. I bit my lip. How would I get there though? I fetched one of the guns and put it in my bag, along with a good supply of bullets. The newscaster stated that Hitler would be in New York for the next month. 7

Apparently, I was going to head to New York. I locked the house up and started down my street to the highway. It was a two hour drive to Montgomery from where I lived. I should be able to walk there before dawn. My legs would kill though.8

Hours later, I arrived outside the place where the governor lived. A kind trucker had given me a lift just outside of Enterprise. I had made my way through Montgomery on my own after arriving. The moon was covered slightly by a cloud, giving me an advantage as a dark red convertable mustang whipped to a stop by the house. I crouched in some bushes. The engine was still running as the man got out and walked to the door.9

The idiot had left the keys in the ignition. I heard the door slam shut behind the man. I slid out of the bushes and sprinted across the dark lawn towards the car. The top was down as I catapaulted into the vehicle, gripping the wheel and pressing the gas. The car took off. I careened down the streets, running a couple stop light as I headed out of town towards Atlanta. Thank god it was the early morning still. I'd probably get the hang of the vehicle by the time I reached the large city and bypassed it. then it was on up through the Carolinas and such, until I reached New York.10

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The sun was setting over the horizon as I sped through Virginia. so far I hadn't called the attention of the police to me. I had shed the scarf and jacket a couple hours earlier, my short brown hair tossed about by the wild wind as the landscape passed me by. The dude I had stolen this from was probably pissed, and probably worked for Hitler. It was a situation I could deal with. I coaxed the vehicle over the 100 mark, enjoying the thrill of speed.12

I drove late into the night, following roads that allowed me to keep the gas pedal pressed to the floor. Soon, I passed over the border into New York state. I bought a room at a seedy motel so I could catch up on sleep. And make a plan. Plans were good things. One did not try to assassinate a cloned monster without a plan.13

The sheer hilarity of that statement never hit me as I flopped on the bed, and passed out. I had forced caffeine down my throat so I wouldn't fall asleep driving my stolen mustang. It suddenly occured to me I was guilty of grand theft auto. Now that was funny. I let myself drift asleep. I was in some obscure town called Pearl River. It tickled something in my memory. I fell fast asleep before I could remember why.14

Dawn trickled in my window. I stood up grumbling, going to peek out the window. Something had woken me up. What had soon became apparent.15

"Give them back!" screamed a blonde girl, only a few years older than me it seemed. See? I'm not the only mental one running about trying to fight evil.16

"Grab her!" Ordered a fat man. Two men dove for the girl, who danced out of the way, swinging down with a baseball bat. the attackers quickly rolled away.17

"Give me back my family!" She ordered again. I continued staring out the window. Who was she and why did she look familiar?18

"Get her! Before she gets away!" Yelled the fat man. I pegged him as one of hitler's inner circle. Humming softly, I picked up my bag, and swung it over my shoulder. It was time to make a casual exit, like a traveling grad student. A pity I looked extremely young for 15. I stepped out calmly, walking towards the mustang.19

"My family!" Said the blonde girl. I was drawing near the mustang now.20

"How do you know we have them?" demanded the fat man.21

"I live under the porch!" She declared, I had to force myself to keep moving. It could be any one. After all, this was New York, right? Granted, not the city, but coincidences happen.22

"You live under the porch?"23

"And bond with the ants!" Well, that phrase from the blonde girl cemented who i thought she was. I put the bag in the mustang, then calmly walked back towards the room where I had slept the night before, acting like I had to get something else. But instead of entering the door, i turned on my heel and charged the fat man. It seemed to be the smartest way to attack, catch every one off guard. 24

"Get in the mustang!" I yelled at at blonde girl, swinging around to the fat man's back. I pulled his hat down over his eyes, digging my knees into his back. The girl was still standing in shock. "now, Fayge!" That got her moving. She leaped into the mustang, driver's seat, and revved the engine. (Apparently, i had left the keys in it the night before) She took off, heading straight past Fat Man. I took a shot, and leaped, landing in the backseat.25

Thank god Fayge knew how to drive, and the surrounding area. She had us hidden safely in no time. Then she twisted around to look at me. I was still laying on the backseat, too terrified to get up. The What if scenarios had attacked.26

"Des?"27

"What gave it away? the fact I know you're name, or when IO leaped into the car?" I asked to answer the question sitting up. I had landed on one of the buckles.28

"A little of both. How'd you get here?"29

"Drove."30

"Where'd you get the car?"31

"Nicked it from a Nazi in Montgomery."32

"Any doubt of you being a spy has disappeared by the pgrasing of that statement," She said, laughing.33

"We need to get out of New York. They'll be on the look out for us here," I pointed out as I climbed into the front seat.34

"True. But where do we go, Des?"35

"Michigan."36

"And we'll get there how?"37

"Canada."38

She was silent for a moment, and then started the car. "Passpiorts?"39

"I'm already guilty of grand theft auto, Fayge."40

"This is true. But what if you want to go back?"41

"I'll live."42

With that we began the long drive through New York state, and crossed the border into Canada in the dead of night, by driving on the wrong side of the road.