Movie Star

Have you ever seen a movie, and thought it could have been better...with YOU in it?1

Check out the new Movie Star 12345678910, the new revolutiuonary, device everyone is talking about.2

Why watch a perfectly good movie (like Transformers for example), when you can ruin it with your own bad acting! Have you ever wanted endless publicity, that becomes sooooooooooooooooooo addictive, you find yourself doing stupid stuff just to get more of it? Well, now you can! With the NEW Movie Star 12345678910!3

Here's how it works. First, you take the 15 tonne Movie Star 12345678910, and attatch it to your DVD player with the non-inclusive titanium thread (this is done by placing it on top of the Movie Star 12345678910, then placng the other end on the DVD player). Next, you simply press play, and act your heart out!4

It's simple, and it's free! Normally, the standard price is $200 for every night you keep the damn thing (not includong GST/Tax, and delivery), but if you call within the next 100 Hours, you can get the free trial version which is only $0 for the first second you use it, with an additional $1000 per second for every second afterwards!5

Also, if you BUY NOW, you can get a free $2 with your purchase! You don't see other sales with offers like that, do ya?6

Side effects include:7

Tantrums8

Increased Swearing9

Partial Blindness10

Total blindness11

Publicity Stunts12

Puberty13

Barbie-Doll Syndrome14

Ken Syndrome15

Break-Up Barbie Syndrome16

Increased Paranoia17

Rational Paranoia18

Irrational Paranoia19

Movie Paranoia20

Inanimate Paranoia21

Pessimistic Paranoia22

Optimistic Paranoia23

And Much MUCH...MUCH more.24

Terms and conditions apply. Must be willing to become a slave of the corporation.25

Item non-returnable.