Once upon a time, handsome customer were lonesome and went to the very special shop.1
- Good morning. Said customer.2
- Good morning. Said shop-keeper. - May I help you?3
- Oh yes. Of course. I have only 105...Here is my nomenclature. I need something zaftig.4
- What are you interested about?5
- I am looking for two good legs, good women's back, nice breasts, tiny waist...red lips, something like strawberries.6
- That was 40... Anything else?7
- Deep blue eyes.8
- 15...And hair? What color of hair?9
- Light brown.10
- 3... Skin? 11
- Ivory...yes, ivory will be good.12
- Do you need her to be fertile?13
- Not now. May I add that option later?14
- Yes, but it is time restricted. It could be done surreptitious.15
- I will have to think about...And of course without any phobia.16
- Talking options?17
- Not necessarily. Notwithstanding to her beauty don’t like onomatopoeia. Don’t like interrogatory. Don't want her to be exacerbated.18
- Hm, good strategic plan. (But, shop-keeper’s thoughts was: Sounds very disingenuous)19
- That's all? Do you need any good skills for her?20
- Not too much, few usual.21
- That will be our donation. Anything else? Facetious?22
- Yes, that would be fine. Does she need any extraordinary ornamentation?23
- That’s your choice.24
- How much?25
- 40.26
- Do you have something inexpensive?27
- Like what? Heart? 28
- No, No heart. Love is evanescent.29
- But this one has her own heart.30
- Than please eviscerate it. Do you have any other switch?31
- We have little electronic hybrid circuit. But, than you will need remote control.32
- How much?33
- 2.34
- With remote? 35
- Yes.36
- OK. How much that was total?37
- 100.38
- Something else?39
- Yes. Beer. Six bottles. Those for five. Please extrapolate...40
- 105. With no further reimbursement. Do you need an advocate for your contract? I know one with representational international knowledge...He is straightforward.41
- No, no thank you...42
- We have a little wedding chapel here... 43
- No, thank you.44
- Flowers? Do you need flowers?45
- I said NO!46
Customer went home, satisfied with his doll and they lived happily ever after.47
Author notes
Used words:
Zaftig
Surreptitious
Eviscerate
Exacerbate
Interrogatory
Disingenuous
Facetious
Reimbursement
Ornamentation
notwithstanding
Nomenclature
Onomatopoeia
Extrapolate
Strategic
Straightforward
International
Representational
Evanescent
Phobia
Advocate
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
1 - 19 of 19
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Well, for English not being your first language, you sure used a lot of the bigger words. Anyway, I didn't really enjoy this, but that's just because I'm a grammar Nazi. This needs work, but whatever. Keep penning and your English will get better!
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Thank you for your kindness and your time to read my work.
~Sonja~
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ummm..ok.. i guess...well i can say that the word usage is interesting. but i simply must say that this wansnt at all what i was expecting. sorry. just not in the mood for this stuff. anyway, sorry i cant say anything good about it i'm just under a lot of preasure to get this contest finished so i'm kinda quickly eliminateing instead of contemplating. well if u have anything else that i could look at that u have that could make up for this then feel free to tell! thanx for entering!
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Thank you for your time to read my story. You comment is funny and I hope that your testicles will stay on their place lol
I agree with you, maybe I made few mistakes, sorry, but, English is not my language, and everything is possible.
¡
~Sonja~ -
Thank you Kylia for your review and yes, it could be a little shop of horrors. I am glad you like it.
~Sonja~
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This was a very cool idea.
very "little shop of horrors" in my opinion, at least that's what I thought of.
It's an essay on the human condition that we spend so much time thinking about how someone looks opposed to other things like intelligence, courage, empathy, etc.
lol as long as everyone lived happily ever after.
good luck here.
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Well, Miranda, there is no need that everybody like it. Also, relation between customer have deeper meaning that you "caught", but, that is also ok.
~Sonja~ -
This was bizarre, a little too Stepford Wives kinda bizarre for me. I also didn't like the way it was written, don't get me wrong it was humorous, but just the back and forth. I would have liked it to have been more of a story instead of the back and forth between the customer and the shopkeeper. I wish you luck in the contest and a beautiful day to you.
-Miranda
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Thank you Kethry. Yes, the main point was that he still have enough for beer.
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Well I guess he got what he paid for, it's nice that he had enough left over to buy beer. Good luck in the contest.
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You are always welcome to my site raspberry. I am glad that you enjoed this story. Lately, my muse spent a lot of time with me lol.
Thank you for your good wishes
~Sonja! -
Ha.. dear.. now this is soo sweet write. if u had not mentions the used words, we might have never known that u used words to frame this lovely piece. coz.. they all flowed soo well..
Good luck in the contest and a good write ! Thansk for directing me to this..
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Thank you Discordia lol Well, you are not the only one in the queue for this very special shop lol.
thank you for you great comment
~Sonja~ -
ARRRGGGHHHH!!!!
Braver then me dear girl. Holy cow that was some odd words. Ha ha. Kudos to you. This was funny, clever, and man do I wish I could order me a new body that way. LMAO. Great write girl
DL~ -
Well, I wasn't sure about readers reaction, but it looks like I have done a good choice. Thank you for your kind and nice comment Joe.
Edited on Sep 13, 3:36 because ''. -
hi sonja, nice little tale there, straight from spielberg's studios, lol. some for t-rex, some for woman... lolol... i enjoyed this read and its light tone very much.
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Thank you destiny. Surprised?
I will check for this mistake.
~Sonja~ -
Lol! I never realized he was talking about a barbie all the time. It was very entertaining to read. Just one mistake I spotted:
Dot want her to be exacerbated.
Dot should be Don't I think. -
Thank you. Well, this is only a tale, but you never know who could be on your road...
Actualy I knew some...
~Sonja~
Edited on Sep 12, 6:32 because ''.
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