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Ok, here is my twenty question Quiz for you....are you the same as me? My anwers are in red...3
(1) What's your favourite Motto 5
A. Smile and the whole world will...think you're an idiot6
B. Do unto others before they can do unto you7
C. Get yourself a rubber chicken, you won't regret it8
D. Go sell crazy somewhere else, we're full up here9
E. One potato, two potato, three potato, four10
F. When in doubt act insane11
(2) When you're not writing how do you occupy your time...12
A. looking for empty beer bottles in ditches13
B. holding your title as the local leap frog champion14
C. approaching farm animals and yanking their teats15
D. talking to your reflection in store windows16
E. passing off Ex-lax as chocolate to relatives you hate17
F. doodling on some bald guy's head18
(3) While waiting in long a line-up at the bank you...19
A. wait patiently and move forward in an orderly fashion20
B. curse the people in front and behind, demanding elbow room21
C. sit on the floor and slide ahead on your arse22
D. pick your nose to pass some time23
E. challenge someone to a thumb wrestle24
F. blow spit bubbles25
(4) Who's your bestest buddy and a must have in bed...26
A. a fluffy teddy bear27
B. Mr. Rogers28
C. a rubber chicken with interchangeable beaks29
D. a dozen jelly doughnuts30
E. silly putty and a comic book31
F. all of the above, at the same time with your mate32
(5) Which of these is your favourite Country & Western Song33
A. Broken Hearted Hog-Callin`Blues34
B. How Can I Miss You If You Won't Go Away35
C. Git Your Biscuits In The Oven And Your Buns In Bed36
D. I Fell Into A Pile Of You And Got Love All Over Me37
E. Mama Get The Hammer, There's A Fly On Papa's Head38
F. My Wife Ran Off With My Bestfriend And I Sure Do Miss Him39
(6) The best way for you to eat ice-cream on a cone is...40
A. short quick licks41
B. bite and swallow42
C. big drooly dog licks43
D. mash it in your face44
E. mash it in my face45
F. let it melt and drink it through a straw46
(7) Which of the following is your favourite thing to wear47
A. knee high socks with sandals48
B. elasticized polyester pants that fit comfortably under your armpits49
C. flip-flops that spank as you walk50
D. lederhosen51
E. The Airssiere (blow-up bra)52
F. a clown suit53
(8) What is the most efficient way to rid yourself of a hang nail54
A. nail file55
B. rub it up against a brick wall56
C. hedge clippers57
D. bite it off58
E. tie a string around the hang nail and the other end to the bumper of a car..then wait for it to pull away59
F. crazy glue it back in place60
(9) When you get an embarrassing itch while grocery shopping, you...61
A. stop a shopper and ask for help62
B. stick your hand down your pants real fast and scratch63
C. lean up against the shopping cart and grind into it64
D. throw yourself on the floor and break dance65
E. ask for the manager66
F. go to the flea powder aisle67
(10) If you notice a booger hanging outta of a friend's nose, would you...68
A. discreetly point at it to let him know69
B. gag and throw-up70
C. laugh loudly and yell "ewwwwww SNOT"71
D. throw your drink in his face and then hand him a towel72
E. stare and direct your conversation at it73
F. slap'em in the head hoping to knock it off74
(11) Which of the following do you love best 75
A. Silly76
B. Naughty77
C. outrageous78
D. nonsense79
E. satire80
F. all of the above81
(12) Marvin Bottomsworth was recently hospitalized for the insertion of an or a "__________" in his anal opening82
A. couch83
B. banana84
C. o'ring85
D. encyclopaedia86
E. fork87
F. gerbil88
(13) What's your real name89
A. Bozo90
B. Captain Crunch91
C. Mr. Bean92
D. none of the above or below93
E. none of your business94
F. Shirley, Shirley bo Birley Bonana fanna fo Firley95
Fee fy mo Mirley, Shirley96
(14) What's the name of the last book you read...97
A. 101 Fun Things To Do With A Wiener
98B. How To Shave Your Schnauzer With No Pain
99C. Nutty Naughty Nonsense
100D. Sky Diving In One Easy Lesson
101E. How To Heighten (Interview with a mad midget)102
F. "Marriage For Dummies" and should it have an expiration date
103F. "Marriage For Dummies" and should it have an expiration date
104
(15) While using a public restroom, you've just discovered there's no toilet paper in your cubicle, you...
105(15) While using a public restroom, you've just discovered there's no toilet paper in your cubicle, you...
A. Shake the dribbles off like a guy
106B. look for an old scrap piece of paper in your purse
107C. take off your sock and use the under side
108D. stand there and let it air dry
109E. pull your undies back up and promise to change them as soon as you get home
110F. use your cell to call a friend for some toilet paper111
112113
(16) When you're upset with your spouse or boyfriend do you
114(16) When you're upset with your spouse or boyfriend do you
A. make funny faces behind his back
115B. fix him green eggs and ham for breakfast
116C. let his belly button lint build up
117D. flush the toilet when he's in the shower
118E.stick a wad of already chewed gum to the bottom of his shoe
119F. duct tape the TV remote to the ceiling120
121122
(17) You sometimes get this uncontrollable urge to....
123(17) You sometimes get this uncontrollable urge to....
A. sing every song from the movie The Wizard Of Oz
124B. throw a pie in someone's face
125C. break out into the "chicken dance" in a ball room dancing competition
126D. in a crowded waiting room, tell the person next to you , he/she is sitting on your imaginary circus friend
127E. blow a gigantic Bazooka Joe bubble in church while standing up and pointing at it proudly..
128F. at a funeral, while paying your respects to some staid old, meaner then hell, distant relative..let a big one go, plug your nose and point at the corpse
129(18, 1.) If you could incorporate more of something in your life..it woud be
131A. love
132B. laughter
133C. brussle sprouts
134D. jelly beans
135E. faith
136F. toilet paper137
138139
(18, 2) What is the one thing you never learned as a child and still don't know to this day
140(18, 2) What is the one thing you never learned as a child and still don't know to this day
A. to tie your shoes
141B. how to measure using 8ths and 16ths
142C.how to tell time
143D. which shoe goes on which foot
144E.abc's
145F. to stop saying - i went to the potty all by myself146
147148
(19) What do you look for in another person
149(19) What do you look for in another person
A. someone who thinks food fights are fun
150B. expertise with a water gun
151C. must be able to play "stairway to heaven" on a kazoo
152D. a serious and no nonsense type
153E. a posh uppity full of decorum sort
154F. everyone has a least one positive quality and your willing to work with that155
156157
(20) Which three words best describe your life
158(20) Which three words best describe your life
A. confused, abused and refused
159B. live, love and laugh
160C. alive, strive and survive
161D. nuttin, glutton and struttin
162E. mad, sad and bad
163F. blob, slob and i dont feel very well
164
Adding your comment:
Go out with a laugh 
Yer just a yankin my chain aint ya 
thanks!
"Hey, darcy, can you come to me at walmart and... spare a square" 
