Accidnets Happen

He spent the rest of the day with Her on His mind. Who is She? Where did She come from? Why was She so god damned beautiful?1

It wasn't until that night, on His way home from another failed Blind Date that He got the chance to hit on Her...Literally.2

He was going so slow that the light tap given to Her calf by His bumper was nothing, but He checked on her none the less, in a minor state of shock that He was given the opportunity to see Her beauty again.3

Just as He expected, She was fine, but He gave Her His cell number "just in case", and continued on His merry way.4

About a mile from home, just as He started day dreaming about how Her hair framed Her face perfectly, or the way Her eyes sparkled when She talked to Him. And how Her face turned the  slightest shade of pink as She and Her friends walked away. The shy, yet beautiful smile She gave Him as She contained on her way, when His phone rang.5

"Unknown Number6

764-817-2061"7

~ ~ To Be Continued...Maybe...~ ~8

Author notes

I suck at romance...This is the sequal to Love At First Sight...Did I mention I suck at this...

What did you think? Please comment!

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    : Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have 0. (?) (Line numbers)
    Ratings:

Comments

1 - 12 of 12

  • Lonely Spirit
    November 25, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Interesting, not enough information in the story so I'm still left with a few unanswered questions. Though maybe that's because you'll add more information if you carry this on. I like the way the end keeps you guessing, I'd really like to read more.

  • Lost In Isolation
    November 9, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    you better start finishing these stories bitch they are awesome do u hear me because i love the and want to know the ending you are not goin gto be a good writier if ur fans want o kill you do u hear me


  • Ethereal One gold member
    October 12, 2005
    Edit | Reply

    very good writing

    I think you are at the start of a good story. I will check back and see if you add to it. I know you are probably busy with school work now. Take care and be well.
    etherealforu


  • CountryButterfly
    October 6, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    HAHAHA this is great, but you are keeping me in suspense!! please continue!! great so far!~becky

  • I Hope You Choke
    September 21, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    lol you're doing good so far, i would probably suck more than you.. so keep it upp! ^_^


  • XWingsOfSilverX
    September 5, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    I definately Don't think you suck! I this this is really good. But i have to agree with the others in I think it could use more. It is a little short, but the end keeps me guessing. (That's a good thing ) Okay, I'm off to read some more!
    ~Amanda


  • lady8
    September 5, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Well Dear you sure dont suck but have a way with words! a talent indeed.Off to read a few more!


  • Cyber Artist Moderators member
    September 4, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    She contained on her way, I guess should be continued
    I think its great that you write a little bit this is how you lean to write expressively write a short piece and play with it until its right the write the next part its not rocket science
    all the best
    Paul


  • BeyondTheSurface
    September 2, 2005
    Edit | Reply

    Great start

    A great start to a story.I would say spend more time on developing things (which might help with the length). I agree with the other reveiwers so far, it really is a bit too short. It does, however, have some great potential, keep at it.

  • chasedbythecows
    September 2, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Like Katerina Ivanovna said, it's too short. This is just the beginning of a story. For a beginning it's okay, but everybody's written a story like this. I think you should go back, make it longer, and shy away from the whole cliched topic that's lurking in your beginning. Also, I think you should get rid of the capitalization of he, her, blind date, blah blah. It just seems silly. But overall, this certianly looks like it has potential.


  • Katerina Ivanovna
    September 2, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Meh, this is almost too short to have anything said about it. It really needs just a TAD bit more to have any thing in it at all. I'd say, write a few mroe pages to it, then come ask for help. Right now, its just sorta silly, like a small grasp of a relationship (or budding one), not the relationship (or lack of one) itself.

    Put some more meat into it, and you'll be getter off.

  • Kilrah
    September 2, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Hmm...not bad...

1 - 12 of 12