So, there I was. I was walking through aisle after aisle in a store so badly named, Jo Ann. I came upon the painting section and stopped dead in my tracks. There he was, my first true love. He looked as good as ever. 1
He's slim but not to slim. Still with blond hair you could tell it's soft just by looking at it. He had a touch of gold around his neck, and that nice brown color of him, I wish everyone could see.. I mean, he was and still is just perfect in every way. 2
So, I took a few steps toward this great work of art only God could think of creating for all of mankind to be in the presence of and smelled his sweet aroma. 3
He is just as I remembered.4
I cleared my throat and took another step. I suppose I was hoping he would remember me, remember how I cherished him so much, treated him with such love and care, and maybe forget about how I just threw him out when I was done with him. When I was in arms reach of him, I took hold. It felt like he had embraced me with all he had and all we ever shared together came rushing back. All the good and bad and I would gladly take what ever hardships I came across with this one. What did I care what the world thought of me or my Art? Hell, all I knew was that I was going falling right back in love with my first true love...Painting.5
Author notes
This event realy happened although the inspiration to write it came from Warrior Poet.
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
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PS..Some of your writing, like this one for example, you should consider posting as a story instead of poetry.
Geeshe, girlie... I could have earned an extra three points on my comment...lol
Grandma
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Well, my dear granddaughter, I agree with Warrior Poet...there is a striking resemblence to Hemingway in this piece. It's a sort of humorous story...the ending...after leading us on to feel that we were about to meet a long lost lover. But over all, yes, a decidedly Hemingway style.
I did notice an error or two...I'm sure if you go back over it carefully, you'll see them, if not let me know and I'll give you a clue or two..or is that to..no, maybe too...hmmm...hint, hint
Good going, Hon. You are becoming such a good writer
Love and
Grandma
beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.
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Thank you so much for your comment. I'm not sure how to react, you compared me to Hemingway which I'm certain I couldn't compare. None the less, thank you so much.
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