Fault

"Alright guys, Joe and I are going to Saturday Night Bowling. Matthew, Alex, and Timmy, watch Halie.. Halie be good for your brothers." mommy said.1

"Yes, mommy, of course I will." I said with cute voice. 2

"Your such a suck up!" Alex yelled to me. 3

"Alex you are seventeen.. Matthew you are nineteen.. Timothy you are twenty. May I remind you she is nine?" mom mentioned. All the boys rolled their eyes at me. My dad walked down the hallway. 4

"You ready honey?" he asked my mom. My mother nodded. My dad held out his arms.5

"Come here! Give daddy and mommy a hug before we go." he said. I squealed and ran up to him. I wrapped my arms around him and he hugged me tightly. My mom also joined in the hug.6

"Be good." Dad whispered in my ear. He released me and then stood up along with my mother. He nodded to the boys. He was always like that, he favored me because they weren't actually his sons. He was the closest they had to a dad though. Their real father was mean and always threatened them. When my mom tried to leave him, he tried to kill her. He wasn't a very nice man. My dad, on the other hand, was actually pretty nice to them. He loved them very much. It's just that they always got into trouble. My dad walked my mom out to the car. Right when they left I glanced to Matthew. My eyes were wide. I knew what was coming. He started to laugh. I started running up the stairs. 7

"AAAH!" I screamed. He was chasing me and he jumped and caught my foot. We both fell on the stairs. He pulled me closer to him downwards. I kicked my foot up and hit him in the jaw. he released my foot to put his hand on his mouth. I quickly got up and ran upwards. I was lucky my room was right above the stairs. I ran into my room and slammed the door closed. I turned the lock on the door knob and heard it snap. I quickly ran into my closet and slid the doors close. I heard him twirling the door knob around, trying to open it. 8

"OPEN THE DOOR! NOW! I WILL TELL JOE THAT YOU LOCKED THE DOOR! HE WILL BEAT YOU WITH THAT WOODEN PADDLE!" he yelled through the door. I didn't move. I didn't care if daddy would paddle me. I felt safe with daddy. He's never paddled me with the paddle, but it could happen. I tucked my knees to my chest and put my head on my knees. I heard the noise just stop. I held in my breath, listening for any sounds. I didn't hear anything. I just let all my breath out, and felt me choke on my tears. Tears poured out of my eyes. I sniffled a little and my head was pounding. I heard a little ticking noise at the door. I stopped. I held my breath again and heard the knob of my door fall. The door slid open slowly. I was still holding my breath and my face was red from the lack of oxygen. 9

"Where are you Halie?" Matthew asked calmly. 10

"I won't hurt you.. After all your my little sister.." he cooed. I knew that wasn't true. My face began to get redder. My lungs felt like they were shrinking. I needed air. My throat was getting raspy. I inhaled the air very fast. Enough to make a noise. Out of no where, the door of my closet slammed open. Matthew grabbed me by my hair and threw my on the ground. I looked to the door. The doorknob was on the ground. He must've unscrewed the door knob. He grabbed me by my forearm and whipped me up. He then slammed his open hand into my stomach, forcing me to fall on the bed. I hit my head on the back board and screamed. 11

"SHUT UP!" he screamed. I quickly got up and started to the door. He ripped at my shirt and pulled me back. He rammed me at the closet. I hit the door and the knob slammed into my back. I screeched out in pain. I fell onto the ground. He kicked me with his foot until I was all the way in the closet. He grabbed the rope that was on the floor and then slammed the closet doors shut. I tried to get up, but he slammed the doors back so that I couldn't move them. He tied the closet doors together, by tying the door nobs together. I laid there, unable to move. I cried and cried. I cried until I fell asleep.12

"Halie you alive?" Matt asked. I coughed and looked up, giving him a glare. He grabbed me lightly and pulled me into his arms. He set me on my bed. 13

"Mom and Joe are going to be here in ten minutes. How are you feeling?" he asked.14

"Like I got hit by a truck." I said.15

"You're tough. You can handle it." He got up and left. I fell asleep again. I woke up in the morning and felt stiffness flow through out my body. I walked down stairs and saw my mom on the couch and my dad yelling at her.16

"Well I don't understand why you have to lay in bed all day!" he screamed. I looked at the clock and saw it was 12:00 Pm. Matt, Al, and Tim were at their Dad's already. 17

"You know exactly why Joe!" she yelled back. I walked into the living room and saw my dad raging. 18

"Daddy! Stop it! You know Mommy had Lupus! You know she is sick all the time! Leave her alone!" I yelled at him. He rolled his eyes and walked away. I sat on the couch with my mom and cuddled next to her. A couple hour go by and I hear the doorbell ring. I stood up and ran over to the door, since my mom was asleep. I pulled the door open and saw two cops standing there. 19

"Ma'am do you know Matthew Christopher Johnson?" The first cop asked. I already knew the drill. 20

"Yes sir. He's my brother." I told him.21

"Is he here?" the other one asked.22

"No, he moved out last year, when he turned eighteen." I lied23

"Do you have an address or phone number?" he asked24

"No I do not. He left. I haven't seen him since." 25

"Really? May I have a look at your house?" he asked.26

"Do you have a warrant?" I asked.27

"No, but if you're not hiding anything, then what will it hurt to check out the place?" 28

"If you don't have a warrant. Then you may not come in. Goodbye." I said while slamming the door shut in their faces. I ran to the other room where Dad was. 29

"Daddy! The cops were here looking for Matthew!" I yelled. He looked pissed. 30

"What did you tell them?" he asked.31

"I said that I haven't seen him in a year, because he moved out at eighteen." 32

"Good girl.." he said. 33

About four hours later.34

"Matt! What did you do!" I yelled at him, when he entered the house.35

"I didn't do shit!" he screamed.36

"Then why were cops here you moron!" 37

"Shit! Drinking.." 38

"MATTHEW YOU ARE MORE STUPID THAN I THOUGHT!" I screamed. He gave me a glare. Dad and Mom charged in the room. I watched my Dad grab Matt by the collar of his shirt. 39

"YOU ARE AN ASS MATT! YOU KNOW THAT! DRINKING? YOU ARE SO FUCKING GROUNDED!" he screamed. He dragged him to the wall and slammed him against the wall. I felt a tear stream down my cheek. I was scared for Matt. My Mom stood there yelling at my Dad.40

"Joseph stop!" she screamed. I saw him slam Matt's head against the mirror on the wall. I screamed. I couldn't take it. 41

"DADDY YOU'RE SCARING ME!" I yelled. He dropped him onto the floor. He walked down the hallway. I saw Matt get up and run out the door. 42

"You can't do that to my son!" Mom yelled. 43

"Well your obviously not doing anything about it! You just sit there and expect him to ground himself!" he yelled back. He walked into his and my Mom's room and slammed the door shut. Mom looked at me with tears in her eyes. 44

"Mommy.. Why do you and Daddy always fight?" I asked innocently.45

"I don't know." she responded.46

"Why was daddy calling you those names at Aunt Debby's?" I asked her.47

"What ?" 48

"Daddy and Frank were talking about how lazy you were." The hit her. She looked like she was slapped in the face. 49

"JOSEPH!" she screamed. I saw Dad barge out of the room and sigh.50

"What?!" he yelled.51

"Were you and my sister's fiance calling me lazy?"52

"Well you are. I'm sorry." 53

"YOU KNOW WHAT! WE'VE BEEN TALKING ABOUT A DIVORCE FOR FOUR YEARS NOW! LETS GET ONE! OBVIOUSLY YOU DON'T LOVE ME OR EVEN CARE ABOUT ME! YOU TREAT MY SONS HORRIBLY! LET'S GO HALIE!" she screamed while picking me up.54

"YOU AREN'T TAKING MY DAUGHTER ANYWHERE!" he screamed. 55

"I'M TAKING MY DAUGHTER!" she screamed back.56

"I'LL CALL THE COPS!" 57

"GO AHEAD I'LL TELL THEM THAT I'M TAKING HER FROM A CRAZY MAN WHO JUST BEAT MY SON!" 58

She left with me in her arms and we went to my Grandparent's place. Which was only ten houses down. When we got there, I ran into the woods. I ran over the bridge that led to the woods, and into the shed. I ripped the shed door open and grabbed the rope hanging on the door. I ran to the nearest tree. I wrapped it around the tree branch and the tied it tightly. I tied the other end of it and made a loop. I swung the loop around my neck. The rope was too long. I tried to make it though. I was standing with the rope tied around my neck and jumped. I slid my legs up and tucked them, so I couldn't touch the ground. I felt the rope tight against my throat. My throat moved to the side and pulled up. I couldn't breath in out out. I felt the rope tingling around my neck. My lungs sunk and screamed for air. I couldn't do it. I slid me feet down and inhaled quickly. I gagged and gagged from the lack of breath. 59

Years has past since then. I am fourteen years old. Since then all of the following has happened:60

I was emptying the dishwasher and grabbed a knife and slit my shoulder. 61

My Mom and Dad got separated.62

My Dad met a new woman.63

My Dad didn't show up to my tenth birthday. 64

Matt got arrested for a week.65

Mom and Dad were finally divorced.66

Mom, Tim, Alex, Matt, and I filed through bankruptcy, and lost the house.67

Had to get rid of our two dogs, and our six lizards.68

Matt got arrested for three days.69

Alex moved to an apartment with his girlfriend.70

Tim moved in with his friend.71

Matt moved in with Grandparents.72

My Dad got married and didn't invite me to the wedding. I also found out they were getting married because she was pregnant.73

Mom and I moved to a two bedroom apartment. 74

Matthew hid underneath our sink from the cops.75

Dad, Step-mom, and Joey moved to a nice condo. 76

Matthew was arrested for a week.77

Tim moved into grandparents also.78

I had my baby brother named Joey.79

Only saw my dad on every other weekend; Saturday 6:00 pm till Sunday 6:00 pm.80

Tim moved out into an apartment with Alex, when Alex dumped his girlfriend.81

My Aunt Shirley was diagnosed with lung cancer. (Aunt Shirley is like my mother)82

We couldn't afford bills, so we moved in with Grandparents.83

Stopped seeing my dad for three months. (Difficulties/not liking step-mom) 84

Aunt Shirley got worse. So she moved in with us. 85

Matthew was arrested for three months. 86

Aunt Shirley was getting better, about a week before Matt arrived from jail and she passed away. 87

My step-mom's and my relationship got better. 88

I didn't leave my room for two months. 89

My Uncle Lyle passed away from heart issues. 90

My grandfather (Different one from who I was living with) had a heart attack and was in the hospital for three weeks.91

I had appendicitis and had surgery. 92

Now it's about two months after the surgery.93

I walked into the Science room and lined up along the wall. We were getting new seats today. I was clearly excited. She announced my name and I sat down at the desk. Then she called Cody Daniels. I was screaming in my head. He was the meanest kid ever and he's my ex boyfriend. 94

"Ew I hafta' sit next to you? Great!" he said sarcastically. 95

"Shut the hell up you dumb ass." I snarled at him. He rolled his eyes and pushed my books off my desk. I gave him a glare.96

"Hey your stuff fell. Go pick it up." he said with a grin. I got up and gathered my book, my pencils, my papers, my folders, and my purse. I set them on the table and began to work on my worksheet. He pushed them off again. I gave him the deadliest glare. I was so pissed. I pushed him off of his seat. 97

"Go pick them up." I snapped. He shook his head and sat back down.98

"They are your stuff." I cracked all of my knuckles and he flinched. 99

"Pick em' up." I repeated. He walked over to them and kicked them everywhere. I stood up and pushed him into the table. 100

"HALIE FARRELL! GO THE OFFICE NOW!" Mrs. Scalf yelled.101

Two hours later.102

"What do you mean you got a Wednesday!" my mom screamed. I left her room and ran into my room and slammed the door shut. My Mom hates me, I hate me, my Dad hates me, everybody hates me! If I could of just shut my little mouth about how my Dad and Frank were talking about my Mom, none of this would've happened! I left my mind to wonder. I gritted my teeth at the thought of everything being my thought. I stoop up and kicked a bunch of stuff laying on the ground. I heard glass snap. I looked down to see a picture frame broken. I grabbed the glass and laid on my bed. I played with the glass a little. I then thought about cutting. I have previously cut myself with scissors. I've never tried glass. I had to try it. But where would I cut? I want it where nobody could see it. I slid my shirt up to my bra and started slicing my stomach. I felt the warm blood slide down my stomach. I felt the cold, sharp glass scar into my stomach. I through the glass down when I was done and looked to my stomach. I saw the carving I had put, "HATE" with a cross. 103


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This is a true story, seriously. Everything in this story has happened. Do I regret it? Yes. 104

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