I would miss New York, but Michigan was worth it. Anyways, I was tired of living in what felt like the middle of the universe. I couldn't stand the bright yellow of taxis or the buzz of all the people. It was too much for me. I was always the quiet type, the mouse in the corner. But I loved lots of things about NYC, too. Broadway. The Jekyll and Hyde Club. My frenzied and big-hearted cousin. My room, from the blue sheets to the pink walls.1
"Ashie, do you want to miss the plane?" My 25-year-old cousin, Melissa, laughed from her car. "I don't have all day!" she added.2
I obediently plopped down onto the back seat of her dark blue Infinity QX4.3
Her fiancé, Malcom Stone, sat in the front passenger seat. Malcom had always seemed a bit annoying to me, but I would never tell Melissa that. He made her so happy. "Hello, Malcom." I said blandly.4
"Hey, Ash."5
That's not my nickname.6
I pulled out The Graveyard Book (by Neil Gaiman) to flip through as my cousin drove me to the airport. I glanced at a few of my favorite parts, only to feel a bit sick and look out the window for the rest of the ride.7
She and Malcom were whispering about something. I couldn't make out any of the words, so I tuned them out and hummed to myself.8
"Heeeere we are!" Melissa announced. I opened my door and pulled out my stuff, ready to leave. "Remember, you can call me, you know my number, if anything's wrong, or something." 9
"I know, Liss." I muttered, running my fingers through my long, tawny hair. I fixed my headband and got my other bags from the trunk. 10
"Okay, love ya." she said.11
I turned around, pulling my bags behind me. "Bye, Melissa." 12
As soon as she drove away, I did a bit of a victory dance into the airport. 13
***14
I rushed through the building, through customs and all that. I found my gate and grabbed a Starbucks iced mocha.15
I sat down, waiting for them to call flight C-17.16
"Meow." my cat, Cinders, cried from her airplane case. 17
I laughed. "Yeah, baby, you'll see Sunny soon."18
Sunny was my other cat. I had to give her to my best friend, Jacob, ever since my parents disappeared. I didn't have the allowance money to feed and take care of two pets. Unfortunately, Jake had recently moved to Michigan- my current destination, if you've forgotten.19
Three months ago I moved in with Melissa and Malcom, not particularly enjoying it. School was starting in two weeks and with the wedding commotion and everything, I needed a more stable place to live.20
And of course, this deliciously refreshing change. Michigan. Jacob's parents were adopting me. Weird, I know. But I can't wait.
Author notes
next chapter: http://storywrite.com/story/335830
:D
Comments
1 - 17 of 17
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I like this... You describe the people well, and with their speech and descriptions, give him a very personal connection to the reader.. example, I wanted to know why, she found malcom annoying.
I like the way the main character speaks and I think you should definitely keep that tone..
a few suggestions though;
para 7 - maybe use "for hte rest of the ride" ? you don't have 'the'.
para 10 - comma after long, before tawny.. which, is a great word choice.
para 15 - a starbucks what? latte? cappacino? coffee?
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Thanks!
Ooh, thanks for spotting those mistakes for me!!! ^^;
I'm glad you like it
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good. I can imagine this. Michigan is a beautiful place, but Ive never been to NY so I cant judge. ANYway, good write, totally. very good.
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I like it, you handled character development very well. Good job.
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I like this slice of life piece. It handles change in an upbeat way.
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Thanks!
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This is a nice pleasant read. I really like The Graveyard Book by the way. I guess you can read any story of mine you want
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Heh, yeah, awesome book, right? Thanks!
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yes
Yes you're right. I like just about everything Neil Gaiman writes. -
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Me too! Have you read American Gods? A.G. and Coraline are my favorites.
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Thanks! I read your live-laugh-love story, it was soo amazing!!!
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I don't something about this story is just really likeable, I don't know what it is maybe it's just your writing style. You wrote this very well and I don't think I can spot an error or any flaws anywhere so good job!
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Thanks!
that means a lot to me!
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[title]
m m m m m m I see forgot [title]
I like this story is it going to be continued
I wrote a true vertual story about Michigan
I had a computer crash its disappeared
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well, I didn't forget the title, I just didn't know what to put -.-
thanks! and i'm not sure if i'm continuing it... sry about your story, that's sad!
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Adding your comment:
I enjoyed it! 
1 - 17 of 17
