Moving On Ch.11.-No

There was no staying after that night. There was no doubt in my mind that I needed to get back to Texas, back to where Chris wasn't. My parents were shocked to find my note the next morning and all of my things gone. I cried the whole way back to college, just like I had the first time I'd left. The wound that I thought had healed over had just been re-punctured and it was still as fresh as ever. 1

'He still loves you, he still loves you.' Those words replayed themselves over and over again in my head and it was driving me insane. How was I supposed to deal with this? I couldn't, I wasn't ready. Deep down, though, there was this sliver of me that felt excited. It was just a little pain trying to release itself from all the furious screaming of the rest of my body. For so long I'd wished and hoped that something like this would happen and now that it had I wished it hadn't, but how did that make any sense. It didn't and that was all there was to it. I made it back to Texas in record time and the first place I ran was to Justin's apartment. I knocked rapidly on his door and when he opened it I flung myself into his arms. I let his strong arms comfort me, secure me from the real world. He picked me up and brought me in, slamming his door shut with his foot. I only remember being laid down on the couch and warmth covering my body. Quickly, I feel into a deep sleep, but even my dreams felt like reality and I felt safe nowhere.2