Chapter one: What's new is nothing I haven't already lost.

When I thought it could all come to an end, it has to start up again, "Beep, Beep, Beep" I groaned as my alarm clock went off.1

I rolled over onto my stomach grabbing a stray pillow and putting it over my head hoping that the noise would soon disappear.2

To my disappointment it didn't disappear but seemed to get louder by each passing minute, "Oh goodie, why did I want this alarm clock anyway?" I grumbled, I laid there for a few seconds trying to wake up properly.3

Then, “Sean you have to get up now it’s a school day”, I heard my little sister Angi yell from outside my door, which made her voice sound muffled.4

Then my door swung on and she stood in my doorway, excitement showing all over the features of her face…Man I don’t know how she could be so happy in the morning…A SCHOOL MORNING FOR LOVE SAKES… Oh wait, yes I do, I remember now but I wish I didn’t.5

This is all because of that Jake Davidson kid who lives five houses down from us, apparently his going to ask her out today, there’s something about that kid that just annoys me… I mean it’s not like it’s not oblivious at all… Well I mean its not like his not following her around like a lost puppy all day.6

And buying her ridiculous amounts of junk she doesn’t really need… Talk about buying someone’s love… ARH!!!... I just don’t like her okay?!.7

“Go away annoying sister” I said opening my eyes to look at her annoyed, “Well Mum said you have to get up now hon-ey”, Angi said sarcastically before she went to walk out the door.8

“You know his not going to ask you out” I said smugly at her, “Pfft you’re just jealous because at least I can get a REAL boyfriend…Unlike you’re IMAGINARY GIRLFRIEND”, Angi said smugly back and walked swiftly out my bedroom door.9

Man I hate her, I hate her, I hate her, I hate her!!!...This is all because when I was younger I must of said her name in my sleep and Angi heard it or something… It was about my past, when I didn’t really have any friends, when I didn’t really fit in to the crowd.10

So let me give you the load down on my past which has came back to haunt me from my little sisters mouth…GRR!!... So I guess I made up an “Companion”, a friend… NO! a best friend which eventually after awhile turned into my Girlfriend, I remember how much fun I had with her.11

I remember calling her “Honey”, I never really did call her by the name I gave her, Samantha was her name, I called her that after my first crush “Samantha Wells”,
But I guess all good things come to an end and Samantha moved schools, I didn’t even get a chance to talk to her… Damm my shyness.12

If you don’t get what I mean I meant the real Samantha not the imaginary one… Just if you got confused.13

I can still remember Samantha exactly how I created her just the way I wanted it, her long brown her that sometimes curled when it got wet, her stunning blue eyes that pierced through my heart every time she turned in my direction.14

Her warm smile it was so perfect but hands down no doubt her personality was the best thing ever, she was so sweet, only got angry at me when I was doing something stupid.15

Her laughter was musical to my ears and her voice… Words can’t even describe it, just so wonderful… I can even remember the first time that she cried, it was the day she disappeared into the sunset at my grandmother’s house.16

I recall her last word through her sobs…It was a long time ago… I was about ten years old, standing on the step outback my Grandmothers house, she was facing me the tears stringing down her perfect face, her eyes were puffy red and sad… When she spoke here words were weak and cracked, “It’s time for me to go now Sean”, another tear fell down her face.17

A whole minute passed but it seemed to quick that I didn’t really realize until she spoke again, “I’ll always love you and be watching over you…Don’t ever forget who you are… I’ll always be with you… Through happy and hard times…I’ll always love you forever.18

I remember telling her “That I wont ever forget her and I loved her too and I didn’t want her to go”, then she just disappeared out of my sight… Out of my reach.19

I recon I cried for a whole week or so after that, I was defecated a loss worse then a thousand sharp knifes stabbing into me… I guess that’s what they call being broken hearted.20

But somewhere in my week of depression I thought… NO I knew she was still with me… Laying by my side just like she said she would be… I’ll always love her.21

After that a few weeks passed and Grandma died… I’ve never been to her house since then… Grandpa joined a special “Navy” group and died the proper way he would have called it, and now it’s five years later and I’m you’re average fifteen year old teenage kid.22

Angi is only ten now… That’s why I’m worried that the same things going to happen to her, but she’s always been what we call a social butterfly… I bet you if she was an eagle she would saw every mountain just to talk to someone.23

I guess I have a little bit more faith in her then what I have in me.