Simply Life - The Final Chapter

Josh turned the corner seeing Alex walking into the boys toilet. Now was his chance. He needed to act now. He grabbed a piece of paper from his bag, scribbling his number on it with a pen. I hope this is going to work, yeah it will, he thought. He put the piece of paper in his pocket. Breathing in, smiling. The smile quickly finished, deep down he was scared. He was finally going to show someone his true feelings. Josh shook his head.1

“Stop being a wuss, and get in there.” Talking to yourself was always good reassurance he thought. He walked into the bathroom, slamming the door behind him. 2

*3

Matt’s front door silently opened. Sofia appeared, holding a glass of alcohol. She watched, as Alex and Zach made out, in the dark alleyway. She couldn’t’t believe it. Alex was always going on about Josh, how amazing he was. Now he was kissing Josh’s twin brother, and not even trying to hide it. 4

Music from the indoor’s stereo was turned louder. A few tipsy girls were trying to impersonate Rihanna “And don’t tell me you’re sorry cause you’re not. Baby when I know your only sorry you got caught.” Oh the irony she thought. She couldn’t let this opportunity get wasted. Even though Alex was her best friend. She could at least have something against him. She took her phone from the pocket, changing the settings to video capture. She tried to hold the camera steady, but she did have quite a lot of alcohol that night. She zoomed in. Smiling. Perfect evidence.5

*6

Sofia walked into the tent. Trying to find her hairbrush. Her head felt like it was going to explode. Alex had been going on about Josh all of the journey. How that he was so much a good kisser. How he was the perfect boyfriend. I didn’t’t care. I’m pretty certain they aren’t’t even going out. I laughed.7

“Pay back time.” She searched through her bag for her notebook. She found her pen, scribbling on the piece of paper ‘Is Zach a good kisser? X’. Hoping her handwritten was too messy for Alex to work out it was hers. She looked around the tent, perfect place, his pillow. She walked over placing the piece of paper neatly down.8

*9

I disconnected the phone, throwing it at the wall. I’ll show him. He thinks he’s straight. I’ll show him. I walked back into the kitchen. I poured another drink, downing it in one. I could feel Sofia watching me. Her eyes watching every movement. I moved over to Sofia. Running my hand down her leg. Softly picking up her hand. Leading her off the counter, down the hallway, into the bedroom. 10

The room was dark. The only light coming from the crack under the door. I switched a lamp on. Illuminating the walls. I pulled my t-shirt over my head.11

“Don’t worry, I’ll take it slow . .”12

I kissed Sofia’s lips. Her mouth wasn’t moving much. Her tongue wriggling around like a worm. Alex could kiss much better I thought. Much much better. I needed to get him out of my thoughts. I pushed Sofia down onto the bed. She giggled, snorting loudly. Whatever atmosphere that had been created had just been lost.13

“I cant do this.” I picked my t-shirt up. Storming out the room. Alex. He popped into my head again. I couldn’t handle this. I needed a drink. I walked to the kitchen. Pouring another drink. Downing it in one.14

Sofia appeared in the kitchen doorway. Fully dressed. Holding her coat. “ I think its best if I leave.”15

I didn’t want to let her go this late. It was past 12 now. About the time the drunken men were leaving the clubs and pubs. But I didn’t want her to stay. “Please stay, you can stay in Zach’s room. Then tomorrow morning I can walk you home.”16

“Ok if you insist. Has to be early though. Need to get ready for prom. Want to come with me?”17

I wasn’t sure what to say. A few hours ago I was still going with Alex. But now I had nobody. “Of course ill go with you.”18

Sofia put her coat on the side. Pulling herself a drink, “that’s all we ever do is drink together. We might as well have fun. Lets play I never game. Know the rules?” I nodded. “Right I’ll start. I’ve never had sex.”19

Shit. First question and I had to take a swig. Sofia laughed. “You knew that would happen. Right my turn. Ermm I’ve never been in love.” Both of them swigged. Then laughed.20

“I’ve never been in love with Alex.” I swigged again. Sofia knew how to play this game. And she knew how to play it well.21

She topped the glasses up. “Last question. I’ve never lied about my sexuality.” I shook my head. Damn this game. I gulped down the vodka.22

*23

“Oh my god. That bitch has the same dress as me.” Millie-Rose lifted her finger pointing. Alex followed her line of sight. Sofia was stood in front of the buffet table, with Josh, wearing the same dress. 24

“I cant stand this. I want to be with him. I’m going to do something about it. Tonight before its too late.” Alex walked in the opposite direction to them, trying to hide the embarrassment on his face. “Lets find a table. Then we can think of what to do.”25

*26

Both of church door’s opened. Twelve men, six on each coffin, entered. The church was silent, except for the occasional sob, or the sound of the men’s boots against the stone. A little old lady, that looked almost ninety, started playing the organ. The men walked down towards the front. 27

When the coffins had passed, every single person sat down, gently trying not to make a sound. When the men reached the end of the walkway, they placed the coffins on the glass tables. Like the tables, everything in the church looked immaculate. You could tell that both families paid a lot of money to make it look nice.28

The strong smell of roses whiffed through the church. The flowers were all red and blue. Red Matt’s favourite colour. Blue Zach’s favourite. Some family members, from both sides, moaned that they should have separate funerals. But both parents were certain they wanted it this way. The vicar stood up on the stand. 29

“We are gathered here today for the funeral of young Matthew and Zachary. Two boys taken from our lives forever. Please all put your hands together, ready to read the first poem that has been selected. . .30

I walked into the hall. It was unbelievably loud for a funeral reception. Many different looking people were talking to each other. But you could see clearly which people were from Zach’s family and which people were from Matt’s. As I looked around the room for Josh, people started to stare. Some of them not even trying to hide the fact they were.31

I finally found Josh, talking to his parents over by the buffet table. I walked over, trying not to attract more peoples attention. I couldn’t stand even more people looking.32

“I’ve been looking for you everywhere.” I accidentally cut in the conversation. I didn’t mean too. It just didn’t look like anybody was talking. Josh’s dad gave me a funny look, and his mother, well his mother didn’t look very happy.33

“Josh please tell your FRIEND to let us finish our conversation before he butts in.” She emphasised the word friend. I knew that she knows about us, everybody had been talking about what happened at prom for the last 2 weeks. Even the parents. 34

I didn’t know what to say. Should I apologise, I thought. Or should I just walk away. Somehow I managed to stutter out, “sorry.” 35

She laughed. Causing everybody to look round, most of them wanted to know why the mother of the boy who died, was laughing at a funeral. “Don’t you dare say that word to me now.” My face turned a darker shade of red. “You should have fucking said that a few weeks ago. When you made my son kill himself. Because of you.”36

Because of you. Because of you. Because of you. Those words rang in my ears. Like I actually believed what she was saying. I didn’t know what to do. I couldn’t apologize again. For the fear of her screaming at me.37

“I think its best you leave.” Josh’s dad said which probably most people in that room was thinking. 38

I turned around, trying to keep the tears from falling down my face. But I couldn’t. Everybody was watching now. Watching me crying. I started walking towards the exit.39

“Your not seeing that boy again. Joshua. Ever again.”40

I looked back at Josh. Wiping away the tears. He looked at me. His face filled with sorrow. Then he turned away. “Yes mother.”41

I don’t know where I crossed the line. Was it something I said? I didn’t say this time. And I don’t know if its me or you. But I can see the skies are changing. No longer shades of blue. I don’t know which way its gonna go . . . 42

*43

A few days ago my room was covered in boxes. Now it was empty. The whole room looked bare. I shut the wardrobe door putting my hoodie over my head. It smelt of Josh. 44

Its been a week since the funeral. No texts. No phone calls. Nothing. Josh obviously listened to his parents. Cause nobody has seen him. I picked up my phone off the floor, and walked to the door. I got an overwhelming feeling of regret. Like I shouldn’t be leaving. But when my dad said we could have a new start. I jumped at the chance. We was going to be moving the other side of London, not to shabby I thought.45

I closed my bedroom door, walking down the stairs.46

“You ready mate?” My dad appeared from the kitchen. Holding a bag of sandwich’s and drinks. “We have a long journey ahead of us.”47

I smiled. He stood next to me. Putting his arm around my shoulder. “Made some good memories here. Didn’t we?” He put his bag down. “Just to make sure, have you said goodbye to everyone cause I’m not turning back halfway down the motorway.”48

“Yes. Lets hit the road.” Once again I lied. But he wouldn’t know any different.49

I walked to the front door, looking behind me again. Taking one look, one final time. I opened the door. Stood on the doorstep, looking gorgeous, was Josh. A part of me didn’t want him to be stood there. Part of me wanted everything to go smoothly, leaving without saying a final goodbye. Cause I knew I couldn’t handle saying final farewells. My dad walked past me, getting in the car.50

“Hey stranger. Looks like I’m just in time.” I smiled.51

“Yeah five minutes and I would have been gone.” Josh took my hands in his. 52

“Is there anything I can say or do. To make you stay. I should have never listened to my mum. I wanted to see you after an hour of you leaving. But trust me my parents can be very persuasive.”53

I smiled. “Its too late. I needed you. But you didn’t come.” My smile disappeared. I kissed Josh gently on the lips. “They say you have to let the ones you love go. And I love you.” I kissed him again. Tasting his lips one last time.54

Then I went. Leaving him. Leaving him standing on the doorstep. I got in the car beside dad. 55

“Just go.” He started the engine. Pulling out of the driveway. I tried to fight back the tears. But I couldn’t. I sobbed. “Stop the car.” My dad braked hard. Causing a few cars around us to beep.56

I got out the car. Running back to the house. Josh looked around. Looking like he would burst with happiness. His arms went around me. Kissing me passionately. “Don’t you ever ever leave me again.”57

I didn’t know what was going to happen. Whether I was going to leave him now or in the future. But I knew whatever happened. I’d still love him. Whether we lived miles apart. Or right next door.