Leaving the Light: Season of Darkness Ch18 excerpt

Emotions are like snowballs and when you depressed they don't start rolling down the hill they slam you in the face. You then become cold, clammy and even more upset than when you first started. Bram, unfortunately, thought I needed to be around other people and experience a slight change in activity so he invited me (dragged is more like it) to one of their "games." Vampires have a strange sense of what a game is. No, baseball wasn't even a consideration, nor any other sport as we think about it. The closest you could call this is fencing.1

Try twenty people in a small room trying to kill each other with sharp, shiny, pointy things with no rules and you'll come closer to what their "games" are. The practice room was full of people. Everyone laughed and seemed to be having a good time. Each were choosing their weapons or practicing. I felt crowded out and I know my blood pressure went up about 20 points as a sword swung next to my arm. Why did he bring me here?2

The crowd was another snowball to the back of the head. It was bad enough rubbing up against people but to hear their thoughts too. I really didn't want to know what Heremon thought when I walked in the door or how much anyone thought I didn't belong. Sweat dripped down the back of my neck and froze over. I turned to leave.3

Bram grabbed my arm and said, "Nope, you're staying. Come on, it's not like anyone's going to die."4

"No, but the last time I cut someone in here it didn't end well." I wasn't even going to think about my last adventure in here with Keir. I didn't want to reignite his anger.5

"You won't be punished for anything you do in here." A big snowball slammed me on the top of the head.6

"Please, Bram, you know this isn't my thing."7

"Yes, but I also know you need to get used to it. Think of it as another lesson. There are times you'll be fighting in tight quarters."8

I hated him at that moment. "Fine, are there teams or is this a free-for-all?"9

"Either, it depends on who's playing. Sometimes alliances are formed part way through."10

"Great," I said without enthusiasm. He handed me a sword, I used this one once or twice in practice so the familiar grip weighed well in my hand. The "game" started before I looked up as the clang of metal on metal assaulted my ears.11

I hadn't ever been in a real snowball fight but I imagine it would be a bit like this. Snowballs came so fast at me that an avalanche couldn't bury me so well. Disorganized madness spread through the vampires as threats were hurled harder than snowballs and the clamor of the great swords echoed louder than the splat of ice.12

I felt as if everyone ganged up on the weak one: me. I ducked every couple of seconds and could only defend myself from what seemed to be a hundred swords coming at me at once. About a dozen slices bled my skin a minute. I was lucky my clothes weren't falling off me. Twice I was stabbed somewhat deeply and movement around me stopped while they made me off-limits until I could heal. My hunger grew as fast as my fury. I hated being picked on.13

I forgot all my training and just started swinging wildly. It at least had the desired effect as almost everyone stepped away from me. Except for Keir. He somehow snuck in-between my swings and shoved me to the ground. I winced in pain and felt as if my blood was going to shoot out my veins from my heart beating so fast. Keir put his sword to my neck, which really wasn't necessary. I wasn't planning on moving anytime soon, well, except to escape the embarrassing stares of everyone watching me.14

I gripped my sword; its chain-link hilt dug into my skin. I readied to hurl it in self preservation. If Keir wasn't my genitor I would have. Something inside me stopped me from hurting him. Maybe it was his blood, maybe it was my feelings for him, or maybe it was embarrassment. I felt so torn.15

"You are pitiful," he growled.16

God help me, a tear fell from my eye. I felt useless for disappointing him, yet I couldn't do a thing. I couldn't help myself with all the pain, physically and emotionally, I was feeling. It was the last thing I wanted to do, to show weakness and prove his point, but it built up so that I couldn't control it.17

"Come on, Toni, get up," Bram urged silently. "Don't let him show them that he's better than you."18

"He is better than me." 19

"Do you think you're going to gain sympathy from any of us here? Get up!" Keir poked my neck with the tip of his sword and I felt my warm blood dripping down with the cold sweat.20

That tiny piece of me that wanted to keep myself alive forced its way forward and feebly I began to rise. He brought his sword up with me as if leading me with it. Once on my feet he took a step backwards and prodded my sword with his. "Let's begin again." He took a defensive stance. I stood there unmoving.21

"Fight him!" Bram tried to lift my hand for me. 22

Heremon made sure he was in the front row laughing at me. He was probably one of the one's who stuck me when I couldn't defend myself. I abhorred his superior attitude. If I could, I'd take my sword to his throat now just to hear that laugh gurgling through his blood. I gritted my teeth and fought to keep from doing something stupid. I wanted, no needed to escape into another world. Not here. I couldn't be here. This was not my life; I wouldn't let it be. I felt myself slipping away from the laughter, the humiliation, and the pain.23