A babe of youth,1
A man of years2
of great quantity I dare say,3
passed one another on the street4
upon a fateful day.5
one had with him a burden6
of all that he had learned,7
the other heavy ignorance8
of knoledge not yet earned.9
I watched them pass, but they knew not10
what teachers they had been.11
To witness the beginning12
and end in unicen.
Author notes
This is, yet another poem by my future character, Nayan. He is a people watcher, and he has a certain... ability that makes this more interesting then it would be otherwise. In case you haven't noticed, based on my other poems, he does not write visualy. lol! I have become very fond of him. Anyway, many of my poems will be given to him, tell me what you think of this one.
A contest entry
- Poetry Contest (rhyming poems) by DominoDan.
250 points, ended July 9, 18 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Your Best Poetry. by tsh369.
175 points, ended November 5, 34 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Tells the story in passing
Wonderful poem that speaks to the gravity and weight of knowledge and ignorance. Excellent observation by your alter-ego. I would not change a thing about this. I very much enjoyed it.
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Thank you very much for reading. ^_^ This is one poem I wrote out of a cluster. Have you ever had the ability to write somthing one day at random and then the inspiration never seems to really want to return? I'm happy you liked it.
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I loved this poem. It takes the basis behind a lot of philisopical (sp?) phrases and makes it personal without losing the message or overdoing it.
I love your style, too. It sounds so old worldly (is that even a word) and is so lyrical. I can almost hear all of your effort in every stanza. I must say that all of your poems, because of your style, make me feel like I'm in a fairy-tale.
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I like this! The rhyming is nice, but could be better with a few replacements! I love your protrayal of emotion! Great work!
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Well written
Well written and great rhyming style too, nice poem and a bit different too, so well done
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