She had waited for this moment for years. She had prayed for it, wishing for him to talk to her. And now he was. He had come looking for her at her home. It’s not like this hadn’t happened before, they were friends, after all. But this time was different. She could feel it. He wanted her. Friends for years and now, finally, he felt the same as she.1
She noted him looking at her, so she looked at her friend and swallowed, hard. He looked away, and then back into her face again. Her green eyes met his brown ones. He opened his mouth to speak, but closed it again without a word. He sat down onto her velvet sheets and looked away again, lost for words. She realized he was to afraid to move forward.2
She sat beside him on the bed and slid her arm around his waist. He looked at her again, only to find her mouth searching for his. She found it and kissed him, now thoroughly immersed in passion, in lust, and in love. It was all she could do not to throw him to the bed and take him. Take him right there. But her self-restraint held as he slid his arms around her thin body. They held each other close, both unable to hold back any longer. Still kissing, he fumbled with the buttons on her blouse while she did the same to his shirt.3
They were undressed at last. He pulled her closer to him. She lay down onto the velvet, pulling him by the arm as she did so. He lay beside her, cradling her naked body against his. She overtook him once again with a long kiss, while her mind was yearning to have all of him. To have him inside her. And she knew he wanted the same thing as she, he said so with the mounting passion within his kiss, hidden in the depths of his eyes.4
He pulled his arms out from around her body. Using one hand, he stroked the area from her hip around to her flat stomach. Gently, cautiously, he drew his hand slowly up her torso, and finally found her breast. She was giggling at his every move, clearly enjoying every second. He cupped her breasts in his hands, looking uncertainly into her face, afraid she would sense his insecurity. But it seemed to him that she had no idea. She slid her hands around his back and gently stroked his skin, sending shivers down his spine.5
But she could tell how uncertain he was. She felt his constant hesitation, his fumbling. But she didn’t care. If nothing else, it made her love him even more. They were clearly each other’s firsts. And that realization was wondrous to her.6
He was teasing her now, tickling her nipples with his fingertips. She let out a gasp, which caused his stroking to subside; he worried he was hurting her. She whispered to him how much she loved him, attempting to reassure him, to get him to pleasure her further. And he obliged. And she moaned out her pleasure, all the while stroking his body, pleasuring him in return.7
He looked at her anxiously and stopped the teasing. She opened her eyes and looked into his gorgeous face. He asked her if she really wanted this. She gave him only two words as her answer. “Take me”.8
He slid his arms around her again, and felt her open her legs beneath him. He knew exactly now what she had wanted all along. He positioned his hips over hears and pushed himself into her. She moaned in pleasure and with an undertone of pain. He pulled out, realizing that he was approaching orgasm. She pulled closer to him, her eyes pleading for more. So he pushed in again. In and out and back in again. She was practically screaming in delight now, and he was close to the same.9
With a cry of pain and pleasure, his orgasm burst forth. He screamed with the delightful pain coming from down below. She knew she was close to the same. Her eyes grew wide as she felt an excruciatingly amazing feeling. She felt the liquid flowing out of her and onto the soft sheets. But she didn’t care. She felt fulfilled, knowing that her dreams of being with her friend had come true.10
He rolled off of her. She moved over, facing him, sliding up as close to his body as she could. He slipped his arms around her, again cradling her in his arms. She felt his warmth and shivered again.11
12
Author notes
A better title will come, I promise. This is weird for me. I've done adult stuff before, but never quite like this. Not to mention, I've never done any type of errotica involving anything but lesbian couples, so this is a little... odd for me. I will add more back story to this as it comes to me, but I figured I'd upload what came to me today rather than getting more and then realizing it sucks and that I've wasted my time.
I need to know if I should bother continuing this. Any good so far?
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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i did enjoy reading this. I like how your story was between two friends who liked each other already. I can better relate to it because of that and made this story more fun to read.
beginning: 3, plot: 4, ending: 3, characters: 4.
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Go for more...
flesh out each step with as much concrete details as you can and then go back and add more..
beginning: 3, language: 3, plot: 3, ending: 3, characters: 3.
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Not cold shower worthy, but has promise!
Even though I prefer a much darker, morbid style of sex and romance, this turned out to be quite a pleasant little
surprise.
Your grammar was solid, and I thought that you had the descriptions fleshed out pretty well. It's definately worth a continuation (and please msg me when you update!).
However, one thing I'd recommend is to change the title. "Love Story" sounds ultra bland to me...
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Yeah, I was thinking of finding a different title... problem was, my muse for this is missing. If you think of anything, please let me know!!
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Very good
you have captured love making in a very sensitive way with out the dark discriptions. Love is a wonderful thing meant to be enjoyed by both people. Keep writing.
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Thanks a lot!!!
seasons
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"Take me", "take me", " take me", I want more... lol
I really liked this story, I loved your descriptive skills it made the scene so real. Great job!
I hope you write some more
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Thanks. I definately will add to this whenever I can
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this is not only good but awesome! continue this. please
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I will. I'll let you know whenever i do if you want me to.
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I THINK YOU SHOULD CONTINUE IT. Not only because i wanna know whats gonna happen next (lol) but because its really good so far. I think that if the writer can draw my attention with a clear setting and picture, its good to go. Please finish it so i can continue to read it!!!
and dont forget!!! DESCRIPTION DESCRIPTION DESCRIPTION!!! READERS LOVE TO BE ABLE TO IDENTIFY EVERYTHING!!!
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Yeah, I do need much more description... I'll continue it a little more (ive got more, just no time to add it yet) and then will go back and add in imagery.
I'll let you know when I get the chance to add more.
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YES!
I think you're on the way to something steamy here. Perhaps you can describe the undressing and what he and she looked like a bit more. Very nice description of how she is feeling!
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good idea, paul, thanks!!!
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