A waitress approached the woman's table temporairly blocking Dunbar's view. As he manouvered to regain a visual, his cell phone vibrated. Not taking his eyes off the woman, he pulled his phone out of his pocket. Sliding it open, he glanced quickly at the text message on the screen. "We've got him." Dunbar shut his phone, put it back in his pocket, left some money on the table, and left the bistro without a word.2
He took a taxi to a parking garage in the business district and jumped into a black Impala. He screeched out of the garage onto 189th towards the freeway. He pulled out his phone and dialed. 2 rings later, "Ethan?" "Neil, I'm on my way to the airport. Have a ticket ready for the first flight to Chicago. I'm on my way to Atlantis." "Gotcha," Neil replied. Ethan heard the sound of Neil's typing in the background. "Ok. The next flight leaves in an hour. Which alias are you using?" "Gary Wright," replied Ethan. "Alright. One firstclass ticket to Chicago for Mr. Gary Wright", said Neil, "Pick the ticket up at the counter just before the gate." "Thanks." "No problem buddy. See you in 4 hours." Ethan hung up and took the exit ramp to the airport. 3
Pulling up to the United Airlines terminal, he was met by a man wearing a Hawaiian shirt and khakis. "Excuse me. Are you Mr. Wright?" Ethan was unsure of how to respond. "Uh, yes...Why?" "Roadtrip", the man said. Reconizing the code word, Ethan gave the man his car keys, grabbed his duffel bag and headed inside. He made his way through the busy airport, all senses on alert just in case. He took an escalator to the second floor where he walked down the long hallway to Gate 3A, passing restruraunts and gift shops as he went. He sat in the waiting area, back to the window overlooking the runway. He sat there until boarding time. 4
After the handicapped were loaded, first class was called. At the counter, Ethan picked up his ticket and then boarded. His seat was a one manseat on the left side of the aircraft. "Perfect", he said to himself. This would make it difficult to fight if the need should arise. It was unlikely he'd have to fight on a plane yet he liked to be prepared just in case. 5
He inconspicuoulsy studied each passenger as they boarded looking for tell-tale signs of a Creation. His trained eye could spot those mutant freaks practically anywhere. A young child entered the plane then. It wore gloves and a sweater with the hood coming down over its eyes. No one wore that much clothing in the spring. 6
The wowman who escorted it seemed nervous as she guided the child down the aisle. He made note of the woman's face for future reference and then continued to study the other passengers. He found that all, except the child, were 100% human. When the flight attendants began their demonstrations on safety, Ethan studied them as well. There were 4 in all. None bore the signs of a Creation. He relaxed a little then. There wouldn't be a fight because a child was easily subdued. As soon as the plane reached 30,000 feet, he would see what he could find out about the child Creation.7
After 30 minutes of remaining seated with seatbelts fastened, the captain turned off the seatbelt sign. That indicated they had reached 30,000 feet. An old man came down the aisle, passed Ethan and went into the lavatory in Ethan's section. "Now's my chance," thought Ethan. He rose and made his way towards the back of the plane where the other lavatories were located. As he passed the middle section, he spotted the woman and the child. He memorized their seat numbers with one quick glance and continued on. After standing in line for the lavatories, he entered the one on the right side and shut the door. He heard the distinct click as the door locked and then pulled out his phone. He turned it on and dialed Neil's number.8
Author notes
Creation- a mutant
The Chosen- a group of radical mutants. their purpose is unclear at this time
Atlantis- a top secret government facility
Ethan Dunbar- hates mutants with a passion, an agent trained for one purpose: to hunt down mutants
Ok. So this is a work in progress. I promise there is more to come. I don't know if this will become a series or not but I do know it will become a book. I'd love to know what you think so please don't be afraid to be honest. I am looking for ways to improve this. By the way, I'd like to give Kyleffi Jane credit for giving me this idea of someone hating on mutants.
A contest entry
- I want your best! by LindaIsMe.
225 points, ended July 18, 34 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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I liked how you wrote about secret agency/spy stuff, and it reminded me of the X-Files at times. It has that realistic, yet surreal quality to it. It's like something extraordinary is happening in our world, right now.
The descriptions were well thought, and they show this world you have created wonderfully. It's like a better Men in Black haha. I look forward to seeing more of this.
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Thanx! I'm glad u like it. It's funny u mention X-Files and Men in Black because I really love those.
I'm hoping this one gets somewhere. I have a tendency to start a story or a book but never finish it.. :/ Not the best quality in the world. -
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That is interesting that you say that, and it shows that the things you like influence your writing.
I think it sucks that the X-Files is gone. I would say they should make a new series, but it wouldn't be the same.
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YA-HOO!
Me Likey!! I love how you intertwine some of the ways you do things in with the story. It's AWESOME!!
But.... When you say that every of of them were human. You put himan. Is it supposed to be like that? lol


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Yeah. I meant human. Sry. I just messed up. I'll fix it. And I'm glad u like it. Seeing as u r my best friend, u mite b the 1st 2 c the rest of this chapter. lol U or my cuzin. It's a battle. lol jk
<3 u!
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Review from a friend
Gave the link to a mate that's not a member here.
"i quite like that
i like how its not really given much away yet, but makes u want to read on" -
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Tell ur friend thanx 4 me. I'm glad they like it.
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she says "i b waitin for more as well! so she better get writin!"
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Lol. Well tell her I am writing more as we speak. The rest of the chapter will hopefully b dun within the next few days.
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Like it
The describtion's good - I was instantly pulled in to the sandwich place.
You sound like you really know what you're talking about with the spy stuff. Feels more real than Hollywood gets it at bits. (Roadtrip was my favourite.)
I like how you protrayed the kid. He seems enough of a threat already for the reader to overlook the moral issue of him being young.
I'm proud to be grandmother to this piece and thanks for the credit (missed out a 'y' btw) but you made it your own. Feel no real resemblance between this and Only.
Well done.
(Creepy thing is Billy from Only Human was going to be called Ethan before I decided on his son being named after him so I changed it so it to something that can be shorted to diferent names that I both liked because lets face it, its confusing enough without two characters with the same name.)
Critical Critism-
-few spelling mistakes (but i'm one to talk.)
-The names you picked for the mutant and their group sound mythologic. Don't know if you were going or that. No rule saying they can't be both. Professor X's brother, Juggernaut got his powers from a magic crystal for example. I know you're not an x-men fan but if your going for this you might want to look up Scarlet Witch (x-men/avengers) for ideas.
-Chapter seems to just stop. I would have pushed on for a bit so in the call something cliffhanger-y can be said... either that our the cell can make a plane do a nose dive.
IN SUMMERY: I like. Do more!

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Wow. So Billy was going 2 b Ethan? 0_0 Interesting. And I know it just ended weird. There is more for this chapter but I haven't quite fixed it yet. I will put the rest of it on here as soon as it sounds decent. And I'm glad u r proud 2 b its grandmother. lol Oh! Btw, Ethan isnt a kid. He's actually in his early 30's. I gotta work on getting that idea across.
Oh yeah. I am actually a fan of the X-Men. I don't know that much about them though. Like I didn't no the Juggernaut was Professor X's bro and I've never heard of the Scarlet Witch. I will check it out though so thank you for the advice.
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I pictured Ethan thirties/early forties. I was meaning the kid on the plane. My bad.
X and Juggernaut are actually step-brothers if I'm really going to go nerd on you. I try to hold it back to function in normal socity.
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Lol. That's ok. I'm a nerd 2 so feel free 2 share watever u'd like. lol
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heyy cousin ^_^
ok so i am absolutely in love with this
i need more...NOW! lol
alrighty you have two typos that i noticed...one the car would be an Impala not Empala.
and two is you put himan instead of human in the second to last paragraph ^_^
i love this and i want more soon!!! <3

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Thanx 4 noticing where i messed up. lol And I'm glad u like it.
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oh and your editor, *cough*riderarabian*cough* is falling down on the job
lol
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Yes she is. lol but we still luv her.
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This is awesome! Can't wait for more!
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Wow. Thanx editor. lol
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I really enjoyed this! Great description!!! PLEASE KEEP WRITING!
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Thanks. I'm glad u liked it. I will be adding more shortly so keep an eye out.
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