Some people say that the town I live in, Ages Death, is haunted. However, I just can't come to believe it. Yeah, sure, strange things have happened, but I never, actually SAW a ghost. And really, I'm not a Doubting Thomas, nor a See-It-To-Believe-It Person. 1
It all started on a Sunday, when I was off to the Library as usual selecting a new book to read, typing up my homework, or doing research. You see, I live right next to the library, so really, all I have to do is walk across the streeet, and wa-la, I'm there. People also say this library is 70-years-old, and some girl was murdered there. Don't get me wrong, the place does look a little freaky, it'd old droopy trees, creaky wooden floors, and old atmosphere, I'm sure a few people made up that myth, because it's easy to believe once you see the place! But I think of the library as my second home, and nothing is wrong with it. Trust me, I've been in the bathrooms where they say if you flush the toilet, you'll hear the screams of the girl who was murdered, instead of flush. I've been here almost every day, and I've done all those freaky things, but nothing has gone wrong. 2
Today I was looking for the book 'My New Life Begins' By: Marisa, and I heard it was one of the best selling books and a top must read according to teens and tweens these days. So of course, it was the buzz of the school, and I had to read it. You know, I just want to fit in and all. At my school, I'm not considered popular, but yet I'm not considered a nerd. I searched the shelves and couldn't find it. I turned around to see if Miss Woodcock, the librarian, was there but she wasn't. So I continued searching. Someone tapped on my shoulder. I turned around, starteled.3
"Would you like some help sweetie?" It was Miss Woodcock. How'd she get here so fast? Wait ... she wasn't there five seconds ago ... right?4
"Um, I'm looking for the book 'My New Life Begins' By: Marisa. Is there any chance you have it available?" I asked.5
"Oh, I heard that's a good one. You know, I haven't quite read that book yet, but one of my favorite stories of all time is the 'Inspiraton Series' By: Hannah. I'm sure you'll like that too." Suddenly, Miss Turner started handing me a stack of books labeled 'Inspiration'. I guess I'll read it!6
"Um, Miss Woodcock, I appreciate this, but do you have by any chance 'My New Life Begins'?" I asked again with a question in my voice, my hip cocked to one side, and my hands dangling losely.7
"Hmmm ..." She searched the shelf nonchalantly like she always does, and out of nowhere pulled out a dusty book called 'My New Life Begins'. "Here you go sweetie." She piled this book on top of the 20 'Inspiration' books. 8
"Do you have the recently made one by Marisa?" I asked. Miss Woodcock scratched her head. "Forget it." I quietly muttered under my breath. Sometimes I think of Miss Woodcock as a second mom, but I know she isn't. When Miss Woodcock was finished checking out all 21 books, she went into a little room and dissapeared. That's strange, I thought. 9
I left the library, and started my way home. I opened the door and headed up to my room.10
"You've got quite a few books there Vicky. Don't you think it's a little ... um ... much?" My dad asked, as he poked his head up from the newspaper.11
"Tell me about it." I sighed under my breath, and went into my room. I figured I should start on the 'Inspiration' series, so I sprawled out onto my bed, and began reading. When I flipped a page I saw blood scattered all over the page, and could barely make out the word 'Help'. I turned the page, and to my surprise saw a heart-shaped locket. My own heart skipped a few beats. Of course, I opened the locket and saw a picture of a girl who looked just like Miss Woodcock when she was younger, and an older-looking man. 12
"That is strange. Could that be Miss Woodcock?" I asked myself. "And could that be her dad?" I flipped through more pages and saw a note tucked in it. It said:13
Dear Diary,
My name is Mary-Kate Woodcock. I love to read books, and my dream is to own a library. Today is April 7th, 1939. I can't wait to make new friends. Dad bought me a new locket, and it has a picture of me and him in it.
Love,
M.K.14
M.K. probably stood for Mary-Kate. ... And Mary-Kate must be Miss Woodcock. And this was made 70 years ago. After all ... 2009-70=1939. I am rather smart for my age. But this must be a different Woodcock, for Miss Woodcock at the library is only in her early 30's. I walked over to the library again to do some research. 15
"Hey kiddo, you again?" Miss Woodcock asked.16
"Yes, me again." 17
"So what's up?" She asked.18
"Research."19
"On what?" Miss Woodcock was being a little nosey, I must admit.20
"Social Studies. I decided to do some research on this library for school. I heard it was 70 years old!!!" I half-lied.21
"Oh, you surely can look up something different dear." She suddenly said, looking a little worried. 22
"Like what?"23
"Like ..." She hesitated. "Like that Marisa girl who wrote 'My New Life Begins'." 24
"But it has to be a place." I lied.25
"Uhhh ... just don't to the library." Her face looked paler than usual. "I like it to have a little mysterious side to it." 26
"Why?"27
"Just don't." Miss Woodcock went behind a shelf, and dissapeared. Of course, I looked up the library. Why was she so worried about what I did research on anyway? And it wasn't even a report! I clicked on a website. It read:28
Ages Death Library is rumored to be haunted. But we know it can be possible for the following reasons:29
It's 70 years old.30
Mary-Kate Woodcock was murdered there around her early 30's31
The town is haunted ...32
I stopped reading there, and reread the second sentence. Mary-Kate Woodcock--murdered? Here? At the library? I typed in the computer Mary Kate Woodcock Biography. It went on and on about how she died in 1939, and haunts to this day, the Ages Death Library. The hairs on the back of my neck pricked up, and I heard a hiss behind me. I turned around frantically and saw Miss Woodcock.33
"WHAT DID I TELL YOU?!" She raged. "I THOUGHT WE HAD A DEAL?!?!"34
"What do you mean?" I asked worriedly.35
"What do you mean? What do you mean?!?! Victoria Justice, you know to much."36
"That you're dead?" I asked.37
"SILENCE!!!" Miss Woodcock yelled.38
"But Miss Woodcock, you're right here in front of me. How can this be?"39
"Do you have EYES YOUNG GIRL? I was MURDERED HERE BY FRANCINE JACKSON AND HAUNT THIS PLACE!!!" She bellowed.40
"Miss--"41
"Call me M.K." 42
"M.K. ... I thought you were ... real ... alive ... breathing ... flesh and bone ... you were like a second mom to me!!!"43
"I was all that." She sighed.44
"Tell me what happened." I begged.45
"Fine. Sit." She brought me into her little room. It was old, and filled with pictures of her and her dad. There was a nightstand with a knife and a little blood at the top sitting upon it. "I was a bookworm, just like you. And I always came to the library! It was my favorite place, and to me, it seemed like my second home." She sounded just like me, which gave me the chills. "I was also one of the popular girls in school, and some people just flat out hated me. So years went on, and I married the school quarter bacl hottie, blah, blah, blah, and then it happened. Francine Jackson murdered me." 46
"Miss--I mean M.K. I don't understand. Why would he murder you?"47
"I don't know Victoria. I don't know .... But I know that there is a word called jealousy out there ...." She slowly made her way to the knife and picked it up. She played with it in her hand a little bit. "So did you read the 'Inspiration' books like I told you to?" She asked.48
"Yes, I did. And I found blood scattered on a few pages and a locket."49
"Yes. Bring me that locket, and nobody gets hurt." She started playing with the knife a little more. Luckily, I brought the 'Inspiration' book with me in my knapsack, to show Miss Woodcock. I unbuckeled my knapsack and took it out. Quickly, I skipped through pages looking for it. But it was missing. My neck felt a little heavy, like something was holding a million of memories. I skipped threw pages. "Where is it?" M.K. asked. 50
"It was here somewhere. I swear I didn't touch it." I looked frantically through the pages. 51
"What's that on your neck?" M.K. asked. She reached for it, and there it was, sitting on my neck. The locket. "YOU THEIF!!!" She hollered. "YOU STOLE IT!!!"52
"No--no I swear! I don't know how it got there!" I yelled. The knife came darting at me, but missed. 53
"GIVE ME THAT LOCKET NOW, VICTORIA JUSTICE." I quickly untied the necklace off my neck, and dodged the knife a few more times. Then, quickly, I threw the knife at her. As soon as Miss Woodcock caught it, she materialized away. 54
Now I'm positive.55
Miss Woodcock IS a ghost.56
And I have her locket. Still.
Author notes
I wanted to try writing a murder.
HowDoYouSayLove's Contest: I entered ages 15 and under.
A contest entry
- Almost Anything Goes double entry by Jennywinnie.
170 points, ended July 3, 24 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - G is for Ghost by tonialoise.
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Honorable mention
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Gold trophy winner
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Silver trophy winner
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Did you like it???
Comments
1 - 38 of 38
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Wow. That is really, really, REALLY excellent. You made a couple of typos tho besides that woop-de-doo without the sarcasm!
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Yeah, I do have a lot of typos in this ...
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I REALLY LIKED IT, BUT IS IT REALLY TRUE?
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I've read this before
Still a cute story and I appreciate you entering it in my Halloween contest.
Thanks and good luck
Pixie
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It's lovely. Very oringinal, and You'll be in the finalists for it.
good luck!
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This was a very good story, and your murder was engaging. A few things you could change:
The name of the town. Ages Death? Really?
The number 70 should be should be seventy
Wala should be voila, for I believe that was what you were trying to say.
Un needed commas in some places
Other than that, good job, good luck, thanks for entering! -
This was a good engaging story
My only suggestions are that the number '70' should be written out (seventy) and to be careful with your commas. Normally, I'm telling people where to place them/that they don't have enough... but with this, I found in a few places that you had a few un-needed commas actually. Should be easy to spot if you do a careful read-over (I always suggest reading out loud if you can; it helps spot the places that may or may not need a comma.) there was also a typo in P26: "Uhhh ... just don't to the library." (I think you meant 'do' not 'to')
Overall, it was an interesting story with good writing. I did enjoy the read here
Thank you for entering the contest
Pixie
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Thank You So Much For Reading!!!
Thanks for reading and commenting! I'll try and fix up my mistakes, thanks again!
-Marisalyn13 (
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Wow this was good and kinda scary. I like scary stories. Thanks for entering and best of luck to you in the contest!
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Wow. Intreguing! Very creepy! Love it!
Plot: 5
Language: 3
Theme: 3
Total: 11
Great job on this. Kept me interested all the way to the end. Seriously, wonderful story. Keep it up and thanks for entering! -
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Triple Thanks!
Thank you so much!!! Thanks for reading and commenting t!!! Hahaha, triple thanks! Glad you liked it!
-Marisalyn13
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Yes I did!
Wow I really liked it. very FREAKY! lol I had to just keep reading on after she read that diary entry...I was really intrigued by it all. (: well done.
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Thanks for commmenting!
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Really Good :)
I admit, your story was spine-chilling and if I had read this at night then I would definitely had had nightmares. Your story was very good, however, it could definitely use some tweaking. The ending, perhaps, should have a more full ending and fill the reader with her last thoughts - we already know she's a ghost. I think that a little description could help improve it, but I wouldn't say it's exactly necessary. One last main point, is I think the story is moving a bit too fast - I'd suggest you put in description to make it move to a normal and good speed because the story jumps a little, especially the ending.
Other than that, the storyline and the whole general idea of this sad ghost is a very good idea. Just work on the ending, yeh?
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I'll work on my story, and the ending. Thanks for commenting!
-Marisalyn13
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It was very good.
I was at the edge of my seat almost the whole time. I thought that it was very interesting. But the ending of the story could have used a little bit of help. By the end, we know that she is a ghost. So there is no need in telling us. And in it, the girl figures out that she is a ghost. So why would she come to that at the end? It's the little things like that are kinda...annoying in a sense. But other than that, I thought it was a very good.
beginning: 5, plot: 5, ending: 3, dialog: 5.
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I'll edit some of it and add description ... this was my first time writing a murder!!!
-marisalyn13
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wow it was awesome i liked it a lot it gave me the chills.. keeping writing can't wait to hear a nother...
beginning: 4, language: 4, plot: 4, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 4.
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Oh there'll be more!!! Thanks for reading, and commenting!
-Marisalyn13
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Awesome.
I like how you wrote it out!
beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.
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Thanks for reading and commenting! I appreciate it!
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niceeeeeeeeee
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Thanks for commenting and reading!
-Marisalyn13
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That was really good... Well done!
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I wanted to try something new and write a murder, so this was actually my first time. Thanks for commenting, I'm glad you enjoyed it!
-Marisalyn13
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It kept me hooked from the beginning, kind of scary to me... Great job!
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This was my first time writing a murder! Thanks for reading and commenting!
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Welcome, you did a really good job for that being your first time!
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I really like how you made it where she believed M.K. was a real person, and you did well with keeping her realistic.
This is very well written with very few punctuation issues.
I did notice a couple small typos that you might have easily missed,
p29 "Uhhh ... just don't to the library." I think you meant the "to" to be a "do."
p45 seems odd for her to suddenly get a little personal right after yelling at her.
p49 "quarter bacl hottie" should be back
I enjoyed it, thank you for entering.
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I would cut the opener, just jump into the library scene. Take us straight into it...but that's just my preference on beginnings.
Be careful with using too make exclamations, and such...they should only be used when they can't be implied by the story itself. So if you can explain how they said it...
"What did I tell you?" she nearly screamed in fright....
Ohhhhh scarey. great job -
OH No!
This was over 1300 words, so I must DQ it. SORRY! -
I loved it.
It was awesome from the strt. -
5 out of 5...
That was good, I can see you as being an author. -
Very intriging,I was drawn to your story by the title. I just love the series The Ghost Whisperer, but as the title of your story has already been used, it's best to use amother title for your story.
It was an interesting read, never the less from someone so young. There were a few typos, but I ENJOYED your story.
Keep up the good work!
beginning: 2, language: 3, plot: 4, ending: 4, dialog: 3, characters: 4.
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sweet
it waas cool i like it
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wow really interesting.... I saw the story unfold right in front of my eyes.
I also really like ghost stories and a good story about murder once in a while. I also think that it was pretty creative by victoria not ever seeing a ghost before when she has seen one all along. so I really enjoyed this story and I hope that you keep writting!
~Alyssa~ (RandomGirl24) -
haha I found it hilarious when you used your own book name for the most popular book hinting towards people to read it. I also like your name. Victoria justice is awesome
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I like where you took this. Very nicely written. A refreshing piece, and rather unique. Try working on the title though - there's already a tv serial named Ghost Whisperer!
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