Angel wings hide ugly, tainted things,
Dogma fights the dark that clings,
But the roving eye bends and turns,
Sidestepping right to find what he yearns for,
Those silly things that make his blood burn for more.1
He stops before his human love's door,
Will he become damned forevermore?
Is there hope for a creature such as he,
Who finds his heart's joy where it shouldn't be?2
It was love, no mistaking it,
And if his calling denied him,
He'd gladly forsake it,
The idea of living in sin
Made him deliciously happy within.3
Finally, he turned the handle,
White feathers burned black
As he discarded his holy mantle,
Now he could never go back.
Still, his heart sang at the familiar face,
And when those lips threw him a smile,
He knew there were better things,
Than obtaining Grace.
Author notes
Yes, this sucks, it's probably the first poem I've written in about a year. You better enjoy it anyways 
A contest entry
- Feathers of Araboth: The Second Coming - Contest by Mag the Chodja.
350 points, ended June 25, 6 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Very cool poem. I liked how you described his fall as a conscious choice. Your wording was done very well in my opinion and I liked the rhyme scheme too.
Awesome poem.
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Thanks, most people either love or hate the fact that I don't stick to a strict rhyme scheme all the time, or the way I word things in general lol. As for his fall being conscious choice, I think most 'falls' are conscious choices, people just tend not to notice the consequences of what they do until it's too late.
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I really liked this, especially the last stanza! Personally, I prefer the word 'mortal' rather than 'human', but other than that I thought it was great!
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It does not "suck" as you would say. I love the good and evil references in here especially toward the end. Aye there are better things than obtaining grace sometimes.
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Feathers of Araboth
xDDD
You're author's notes are silly. *playful slap*
You're silly.
I actually quite liked this. I don't know why, but this topic never crossed my mind when I posted up this contest, or even the first. xD
Which is odd, 'cuz this is, like, 'common' among the uncommon angelic portrayal. Brain fart on my part.
It flowed pretty well, it was a great topic, and your metaphors were rather well pursued. The only irksome thing I have is the rhyme scheme. It's a good scheme, I'm just not partial to that form - personal opinion.
Loved the last stanza, though. I think it was the best.
Really glad you entered, Bobo, and good luck in mah cawntest.
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Yeah, people tend to either love or be annoyed by how I use rhyme, I Can write more structured poems, but then they come out kind of artificial for me lol. When I do these, it's more like a freewrite I guess, I just subconsciously rhyme things with no attention to meter.
Yeah really, how did you not expect this topic?! lol.. I looked it over after and was like "oh noez, clicheeeee"
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xDDD
Well, it's good you're bustin' a flow up in this piece for Angelic conquest.
lol. I have no idea, dude. It completely slipped my mind, and as I read the entries, I see a trend going. xD
My last contest didn't get a single angel/human love poem, if I remember right.
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