Unbeatable


I felt my happiness build up and almost get to the bursting point. It was the moment I had been waiting for my whole life. I could have sworn there was sunshine coming from the tips of my fingers, or that I grew wings and was about to fly away. Like all the sorrow in the world ended, and was replaced with an unbeatable feeling. Like all the times my heart was shattered got erased, or never happened. 

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A contest entry

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Comments

  • Wow nice entry. Really loved the depth in your words. Thanks for entering, and I wish you the best of luck in the contest. -Chantale

    beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.


  • franklynx
    June 15
    Edit | Reply
    nice job......... really good


  • Fizbop
    June 14

    Edit | Reply
    Felt it could of used something more and it feels as if it's missing something. I feel you could have made it longer and a bit more enjoyable. It is well written just feel that it needs more.


  • So Strange Greeters member
    June 13

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    This was very well written, especially for someone of the age of twelve. I feel that you will have many fans in the future... you may get signed quickly with writing like this, if that is truly what you want. It's not perfect, but a really good short paragraph like this one would be a great start to a longer short story. I like it and hope to read more of your stuff soon.

    Welcome to the site and may you continue having fun writing... I'm sure you will, but wishing you fun isn't going to make you have less fun, so I'm wishing it. Continue and never stop, unless you feel it in your heart to stop writing.